Hi ladies, I may have mentioned before that there is some debate about my doing a bedeken. Can someone please explain the tradition a bit more to me? What exactly does it symbolize? How long does it take? Is there any way this can be done either completely before the ceremony (the veil is lowered and lifted before the processional) or is it possible do lower the veil at the start of the ceremony under the chuppah (or maybe right in front)?
Basically, I am somewhere in between reform and conservative. We are being married by my conservative cantor cousin, and our conservative/reconstructionist rabbi. Our wedding is not in a synagogue. My cousin is basically insisting that I do a bedeken after the ketubah signing, however I have a strong gut feeling against being walked down the aisle with a veil covering my face. I am appreciative and respectful of tradition, but I cannot seem to be okay with this. Its not a vanity thing, its just a personal thing. Perhaps more information and understanding will help. Thanks!