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Elle1036
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First Dance?
Elle1036
member
Are you/did you/will you take dance lessons or choreograph something in preparation for your first dance at your reception?
I'm just now starting to think about the fact that we'll actually be expected to dance... and neither of us knows how... and I'm wondering if people would really miss it if we just skipped the spotlight dances altogether.
What about you?
I'm just now starting to think about the fact that we'll actually be expected to dance... and neither of us knows how... and I'm wondering if people would really miss it if we just skipped the spotlight dances altogether.
What about you?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: First Dance?
Motolyn's House Remodel Blog Starting anew Nov. 2012.
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[QUOTE]We did not choreograph anything. I really enjoyed our first dance and mom/son, father/daughter dances. It doesn't matter if you just hold each other and spin around slowly. . . at least it wouldn't matter to me. I don't care if the couple knows how to dance.<strong> It it more about just sharing that moment for the two of you than what others are thinking/doing. Just my 2 cents. </strong>
Posted by cschiano[/QUOTE]
That's how I feel, too... at other weddings. At my own, I feel like people are going to judge us if all we do is stand there and sway from foot to foot, which is really all we know how to do.
If you are worried about it you can have the DJ ask people to join you half way through the song so that all eyes aren't on you for the whole song. Also, the father-daughter dance or mother-son dances don't need to be spotlight dances. At most weddings I've gone too the DJ announces those dances and anyone who wants to dance with their father or mother at that point goes on the dance floor. It's more fun for the guests that way I think. No one really wants to watch those spotlight dances.
It started with step-touch, moved to East coast swing (H's favorite), my fake Foxtrot, a spin, a little more East coast swing, and ended with the dramatic dip. It was awesome...except at the actual wedding, the dance floor was kind of uneven, and I managed to step on my own dress a couple times (it managed to get longer after it was hemmed).
We rehearsed in the parking lot of our condo complex because it was the only space we had.
ETA: To answer Elle's other question, I really wanted to take dance lessons specifically for the wedding, but private lessons are expensive and we just didn't have a lot of free time. We knew enough from having gone before to work out some basic steps.
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[QUOTE]Elle, I feel like after the first 30 seconds or so, I'm not watching the couple that closely anyway, unless they are doing a choreographed dance. If they are just swaying back and forth (like FI and I will be, because I can't dance), I usually stop paying attention, or just listen to the song. Maybe I'm bad wedding guest, though.
Posted by polo1425[/QUOTE]
I do the same thing. It's cute to watch for about a minute and then I usually shift my attention away from it.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: First Dance? : That's how I feel, too... at other weddings. <strong> At my own, I feel like people are going to judge us if all we do is stand there and sway from foot to foot, which is really all we know how to do.</strong>
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]
This is what I was worried would happen at our wedding. Then one day I randomly found a Groupon for dance lessons and bought it. We ended up having so much fun that we signed up to take even more lessons.
I get super freaked out when I'm the center of attention and people are looking at me, so taking dance lessons has been a real confidence booster. We're not doing anything choreographed, we're just learning how to do the foxtrot to our first dance song, plus some spins and dips and stuff like that.
Even if you don't take lessons, you could learn a lot just through youtube and stuff. You could look up what type of dance would fit with your song (i.e. foxtrot, swing, etc.) and find videos teaching you how to do the steps.
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[QUOTE]Elle, I feel like after the first 30 seconds or so, I'm not watching the couple that closely anyway, unless they are doing a choreographed dance. If they are just swaying back and forth (like FI and I will be, because I can't dance), I usually stop paying attention, or just listen to the song. <strong>Maybe I'm bad wedding guest, though.</strong>
Posted by polo1425[/QUOTE]
H and I hope people liked our dance and stuff, but it was for us, not for them, so I wouldn't care if people didn't watch the whole time.
I don't find the first dance boring, I love to hear the song they chose and watch the couple enjoying themselves.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: First Dance? : This is what I was worried would happen at our wedding. Then one day I randomly found a Groupon for dance lessons and bought it. We ended up having so much fun that we signed up to take even more lessons. I get super freaked out when I'm the center of attention and people are looking at me, so taking dance lessons has been a real confidence booster. We're not doing anything choreographed, we're just learning how to do the foxtrot to our first dance song, plus some spins and dips and stuff like that. Even if you don't take lessons, you could learn a lot just through youtube and stuff. <strong>You could look up what type of dance would fit with your song (i.e. foxtrot, swing, etc.) and find videos teaching you how to do the steps.</strong>
Posted by mookow86[/QUOTE]
I looked up some videos yesterday when I started thinking about this, and now I know the basic steps for the waltz and the foxtrot, but I'm not sure how to go about deciding whether that fits with our song or not. For example, since the foxtrot is a combination of slow and quick steps, how do you keep time with the music? I really feel like I need a teacher. Ha.
I don't feel like we need to choreograph the whole thing, but I would like to know enough dance steps to keep us going for the three minutes...
I'll totes be a judgey mcjudgerson.
Seriously though, it's a great "moment" but you can have an equally special moment out of the spotlight, if that makes you more comfortable. Stay true to yourself and your personality. No one will care.
True story, at my bff's wedding, I totally missed the special dances because I was talking with my friends. And I was in the bridal party.
"You're our early 20's BSC scarecrow. They cower at your maturity." - lennonkdc
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:First Dance?: I'll totes be a judgey mcjudgerson. Seriously though, it's a great "moment" but you can have an equally special moment out of the spotlight, if that makes you more comfortable. Stay true to yourself and your personality. No one will care. True story, at my bff's wedding,<strong> I totally missed the special dances because I was talking with my friends. And I was in the bridal party.</strong>
Posted by audrewuh[/QUOTE]
Awesome! I hope that happens for us. Maybe I can pay off my ringbearer to cause a diversion.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:First Dance? : Awesome! I hope that happens for us. Maybe I can pay off my ringbearer to cause a diversion.
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]
You wouldn't have to pay me, I can come and create a diversion in the middle of your first dance :) just feed me.
Motolyn's House Remodel Blog Starting anew Nov. 2012.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:First Dance? : Awesome! I hope that happens for us. Maybe I can pay off my ringbearer to cause a diversion.
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]
At H's friend's wedding, the ring bearer and flower girl were slow dancing during the first dance, it was adorable and consequently, most people were paying more attention to that. They were PISSED about it apparently.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: First Dance? : I looked up some videos yesterday when I started thinking about this, and now I know the basic steps for the waltz and the foxtrot, <strong>but I'm not sure how to go about deciding whether that fits with our song or not</strong>. For example, since the foxtrot is a combination of slow and quick steps, how do you keep time with the music? I really feel like I need a teacher. Ha. I don't feel like we need to choreograph the whole thing, but I would like to know enough dance steps to keep us going for the three minutes...
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]
It depends on the tempo of the song and the time signature...what's your song? Maybe I can help figure it out.
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ETA: I can also tell you that I am really good with latin dances (cha cha, rumba, salsa..), and while they aren't done very often for weddings, I think they'd be a lot of fun for a first dance.
We'd tentatively decided on "The One I Love" by David Gray, but we're not set on it. If it doesn't lend itself to a dance, we'll change it.
Friends of ours took lessons and had a choreographed dance, and I felt obligated to pay attention b/c I knew they'd spent so much time at it. It was a bit awkward, though, b/c it felt much more like something they did for their guests than for themselves, if that makes sense? They just seemed to be uncomfortable.
TBH, I'll watch the first 30 seconds of the theme dances, and then my attention usually turns back to my drink, app, and the conversation at the table.
Maybe this is terrible, but I don't think guests care that much about first dance or parent/offspring dances or any other theme dance.
So. I say do what makes YOU happy. I think that dance is really for you and your H, so whatever will give you guys the most enjoyment/feel most genuine to you, do that.
We've already agreed that our first dance will be Never Gonna Give You Up, and you can't ballroom dance to that.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: First Dance? : I looked up some videos yesterday when I started thinking about this, and now I know the basic steps for the waltz and the foxtrot, but I'm not sure how to go about deciding whether that fits with our song or not. For example, since the foxtrot is a combination of slow and quick steps, how do you keep time with the music? I really feel like I need a teacher. Ha. I don't feel like we need to choreograph the whole thing, but I would like to know enough dance steps to keep us going for the three minutes...
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]
Honestly, unless you really want to do the full song, I recommend cutting it shorter (to like two minutes). I can do that for you if you like--I cut all the music for my dance teacher.
Foxtrot's slow-quick-quick steps are done on counts 1, 3, and 4 of music in 4/4 time. If you can count the music as "1234, 1234" then just take the slow step on one, hold two, and take the two quick steps on 3 and 4. Foxtrot is basically a waltz in 4 count music instead of 3 count music.
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