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Uninvited guests attending the wedding.

brittanylemosbrittanylemos
in Chit Chat
My fiance and I are having a small destination wedding. 2 people who were not invited to the wedding already booked their flight and hotel. They found out our wedding info from another family member. We were having a small wedding for two reasons, first we only wanted it to be our closest family and friends and second we simply cannot afford a big wedding. What do I do at this point since they have already booked and paid? How do I prevent future people from booking? We did send out actual invites to our specific guest list, the 2 who have booked did not receive one of our invites
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Re: Uninvited guests attending the wedding.

  • kmbryant2413kmbryant2413 member
    1000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    You find out who told them and make them clear it up, and tell them they are not invited no matter what they booked. It's not on you, it's on whoever thought it 'okay' to share your invite. They did not RSVP with you, therefore you are not required to accommodate them.
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  • Knottie_22382102Knottie_22382102 member
    5 Love Its
    edited March 2013
    How presumptuous of them!

    Are you against them coming? Can you afford 2 more?

    If you aren't against them coming, and can make 2 more work, I would just send them an invitation. Obviously they like you enough to fly out to your wedding. I love a lot of my long distance friends dearly but I wouldn't fly out for a weekend for 90% of them.

    ETA: If you don't want them there, whoever told them should tell them they arent invited.
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    That family member needs to contact them. This is their mess, not yours.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • mrsbobfilsonmrsbobfilson member
    100 Comments
    i agree- the family member that told them all about it should call them and 'say i'm sorry if i gave you the wrong impression, her wedding is by invitation only!" or you can call them and say the same thing. maybe they can get a refund??
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  • Daizy106Daizy106 member
    100 Comments 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_uninvited-guests-attending-the-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f7371f6-d21a-43fd-89c3-19f5cfcf25bePost:8fe57914-69cc-43ed-8f8c-ea66463a3a59">Re: Uninvited guests attending the wedding.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Uninvited guests attending the wedding. : It doesn't matter.  They were not invited. OP- You have no obligation in this situation.  Talk to the family member that invited them and clarify that you've sent invitations to those that will be welcome at the wedding.  If you did not personally invite someone they will not be welcome at the event.  Then call your venue and make sure they know what happened.  They can work with you to prevent people you didn't invite from attending.
    Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

    your signature scared the crap out of me! she is my worst nightmare omg-my heart is pounding! lol
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  • lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Wow it's pretty presumptuous for them to think they are invited.    

    I also think it's presumptuous to think the family member "invited" them to the wedding.   Maybe they did? Or maybe the uninvited family is like Cousin Eddie from National Lampoon's Vacation who weasels their way into situations.        

    You should still contact the family member, just don't go accusing them of inviting people when your not sure who is making the assumption.  








    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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