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Bridesmaid Issue

MrsSMRiversMrsSMRivers
10 Comments
in Moms and Maids
So my FI has 3 sisters I thought since I am asking him to have my homosexual best friend in his wedding party I would extend the invitation to him to have 1 or 2 of his sisters in my wedding party. I asked him which two he would like me to extend the invite to initially. We decided to only pick 1 or 2 because we both agreed we do not want a large wedding party with no more than maybe 5 people on each side. He stated he would like his oldest and youngest sister to be in my wedding party and if he could choose between the two he would pick his oldest sister because he is the closer to her. Initially, that was fine but my relationship with his oldest sister has since soured and I honestly barely want her at our wedding(biting the bullet on that lol) so while I would have no problem and be more than happy with his youngest or middle sister in my wedding party I want him to be happy and since he is up for my request I dont want to not fulfill his. I'm just torn because I want my wedding party and our events together to be fun filled with no drama and I feel like with my feelings towards her and her feelings towards me it would just be a bad idea for her to be more than a guest at our wedding. Any help?
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Re: Bridesmaid Issue

  • bachus79bachus79 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My advice would be that if it's important to your FI to have his sister(s) represented in the WP, I would ask all 3 or only 1.  I think it would be hurtful to leave out just one sister from the WP.

    Another option would be for your FI to have his sisters stand with him.

    Also, just because he was kind enough to have your friend as a groomsman, doesn't mean you have to have his sisters as bridesmaids.  Is this something he really wants, or was it just you offering?


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  • covejackcovejack
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Let him have whichever sisters he wants on his side.  Have your male best friend on your side.  You don't have to divide the WP by gender.
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  • MrsSMRiversMrsSMRivers
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    The reason we were going to do 2 out of 3 is because he feels his middle sister will not want to be in the WP or do any wedding activities just be a guest. We thought of having my best friend on my side but after mentally viewing it we really wanted to keep an even guys on one side girls on the other in hight line WP. I havent asked anyone to be in my wedding party officially but the issue with his sisters like retreadbride stated is a looming issue because I have my gfs who are asking to be apart of the WP and I am only having 5 this includes my MOH my sister, so i actually only have 4 spots. SMH! I truly dont want his sisters to compose my entire WP because I'm not close at all with any of them. I'd rather have my friends and although my FI says its ok for his sisters to just be guest I can already see(from previous drama moments) the issue being revisited later on. 
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Then his sister should be the one to make that decision by declining the invitation to be in the wedding party.  I'm sorry but it is rude and hurtful to choose 2 out of 3 for the sake of numbers.  Your wedding is one day, she will your family forever.
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  • MrsSMRiversMrsSMRivers
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Which I can totally understand but on my end honestly I'd rather have one or none because I am in no way shape or form close to his sisters especially his oldest sister we get along the very least. I would prefer having either his youngest or middle sister in my WP but he prefers his oldest sister. Its honestly something I was offering but from the looks of things none of them may get the invitation... 
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  • ootmother2ootmother2 member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    You sure do have a lot of problems for a troll.

    Didn't you have someone hold your bouquet at your debutante ball?

    Such a shame, isn't it, when you can't rely on friends.
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  • staybeautiful1717staybeautiful1717
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I agree with PP's about having his sister on his side, and your guy friend on your side.
    & if you're worried about it being even (though most people on here say it's "not a problem", but I'm very specific, so I understand that issue lol), I would do it this way...& then it truly would be. Just have your bridesman walk with his groomsmaid. ;]

    for example, five people on each side:
    Yours          His
    Girl              Guy
    Guy             Girl
    Girl              Guy
    Girl              Guy
    Girl              Guy
    image
    the reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected. ~nicholas sparks<3</center>
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  • Queen JaneQueen Jane member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_bridesmaid-issue-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:e6334325-9897-4a10-b157-2adede778530Post:ede882fe-4807-47ce-8fd8-bd740e625ba7">Re: Bridesmaid Issue</a>:
    [QUOTE]You sure do have a lot of problems for a troll. Didn't you have someone hold your bouquet at your debutante ball? Such a shame, isn't it, when you can't rely on friends.
    Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]<div>
     *snort*</div>
    Married! In New Orleans BIO Photobucket
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