Bitchy Brides

healyl99 · April 2010

honesty is one thing such as " I think that idea is rude and tacky and you shouldn't do it".. I think it's wrong to say that "Yes you are a b*tch, you are selfish, arrogant whiny brat, etc etc that I have heard said on here..

why would anyone say something like that to someone? Yes call their idea tacky, call it rude.. but don't go on to say all those things. That is exactly HS mean girls behavior. I didn't think grown ups in the real world (or internet world) talked to one another. If you want to give advice, then do it. But I didn't understand the need to tell some one they are a whiny, spoiled brat who doesn't deserve any friends or bridal party and we wish you get divorced etc. I have just seem this type of talk while on here, and didn't think this is how bride to bride should talk to one another.

beatlesgirl25 · April 2010

*sigh*

Meg, where are those "You are not THE ONE" badges already?

tidetravel · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:fc9a0e45-006f-49f5-b8e1-5c05c750a3fb">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]honesty is one thing such as " I think that idea is rude and tacky and you shouldn't do it".. I think it's wrong to say that "Yes you are a b*tch, you are selfish, arrogant whiny brat, etc etc that I have heard said on here.. why would anyone say something like that to someone? Yes call their idea tacky, call it rude.. but don't go on to say all those things. That is exactly HS mean girls behavior. I didn't think grown ups in the real world (or internet world) talked to one another. If you want to give advice, then do it. But I didn't understand the need to tell some one they are a whiny, spoiled brat who doesn't deserve any friends or bridal party and we wish you get divorced etc. I have just seem this type of talk while on here, and didn't think this is how bride to bride should talk to one another.
Posted by healyl99[/QUOTE]

So now you want to hear "that idea is rude and tacky and you shouldn't do it?" Good. Please read:

<a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-doesnt-want-chip-bachelorette_.0">http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-doesnt-want-chip-bachelorette_.0</a>

betrothed123 · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:fc9a0e45-006f-49f5-b8e1-5c05c750a3fb">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]honesty is one thing such as " I think that idea is rude and tacky and you shouldn't do it".. I think it's wrong to say that <strong>"Yes you are a b*tch, you are selfish, arrogant whiny brat, etc etc</strong> that I have heard said on here.. why would anyone say something like that to someone? Yes call their idea tacky, call it rude.. but don't go on to say all those things. That is exactly HS mean girls behavior. I didn't think grown ups in the real world (or internet world) talked to one another. If you want to give advice, then do it. But I didn't understand the need to tell some one they are a whiny, spoiled brat who doesn't deserve any friends or bridal party and we wish you get divorced etc. I have just seem this type of talk while on here, and didn't think this is how bride to bride should talk to one another.
Posted by healyl99[/QUOTE]

When someone titles their thread "Am I being a huge bitch?" They are inviting people to say "Yes, you're being a huge bitch." If the thread was titled "Am I wrong?" The response would not be "Yes, you're a huge bitch." It would be "Yes, you're wrong." The response parallels the question in most of these cases.

And again, if you don't like the way the ladies here respond, go to one of the other forums where the responses are much nicer. No one is forcing you to stick around here.

MeaghanandMichael · April 2010

Seriously Healy? Do you spend ANY time on here? I for one spend a lot of time and I have never heard some one tell an OP they hope OP gets divorced. The closest I have come was telling an OP I felt sorry for her FI because she was treating him like complete crap.

I could go on, but I would rather just show you this:

beatlesgirl25 · April 2010

Oh my goodness. Thank you for this, Tide. I thought healy's vitriol against this board just smacked of "no one has validated my horrible ideas and sense of entitlement." Now I see that it is true.

Healy, you just lost all credibility on what's appropriate around here.

MeaghanandMichael · April 2010

Oh good grief Healy, I just read the link Tide put up there and you were ridiculous. I am now dying laughing considering you think some people just have no common sense, when if fact you are one of those people. No one was being catty to you and every one gave you their honest opinions on how to treat people with compassion, friendship and respect.

No wonder you are so butt hurt.

beatlesgirl25 · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:843469a5-5655-482c-94ac-ddc9ad127461">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]Seriously Healy? Do you spend ANY time on here? I for one spend a lot of time and I have never heard some one tell an OP they hope OP gets divorced. The closest I have come was telling an OP I felt sorry for her FI because she was treating him like complete crap. I could go on, but I would rather just show you this:
Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

<3

And actually, the only time I've heard someone saying they hope someone gets divorced is in situations where the OP lashes out at the board. Things like, "I hope you ladies have expensive divorce lawyers" or "Your H/FI looks up porn to avoid looking at you, enjoy your divorce!"

tidetravel · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:6b2db318-1eb8-4c0d-a20c-003c81e02235">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bitchy Brides : <3 And actually, the only time I've heard someone saying they hope someone gets divorced is in situations where the OP lashes out at the board. Things like, "I hope you ladies have expensive divorce lawyers" or "Your H/FI looks up porn to avoid looking at you, enjoy your divorce!"
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]

Don't forget, "I hope you have a miscarriage."

MeaghanandMichael · April 2010

Tide, seriously, my stomach turns for you every time I even think about that.

betrothed123 · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:ac4b6fff-9b63-45f8-94d2-c1f557e1ec3e">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bitchy Brides : Don't forget, "I hope you have a miscarriage."
Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

That was disgusting, and most definitely over the line.

tidetravel · April 2010

It's ok, M&M. It's not like I took it any more to heart as anyone does w/ the "I feel sorry for your DH" comments.

It just goes to show how vile people can be when you don't validate their stupid ideas. And how it's usually not us "meanies" pull the childish cards.

MeaghanandMichael · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:ae6079f7-bbb4-474f-943a-cf070e871006">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]It's ok, M&M. It's not like I took it any more to heart as anyone does w/ the "I feel sorry for your DH" comments. It just goes to show how vile people can be when you don't validate their stupid ideas. And how it's usually not us "meanies" pull the childish cards.
Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

Good for you! That is pretty amazing you are that strong. I always think to myself there is not much any one could say to me on here to hurt me, except maybe something like that.

And yeah, it is definitely not us who are that vile. E is gone now anyway.

beatlesgirl25 · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:ae6079f7-bbb4-474f-943a-cf070e871006">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]It's ok, M&M. It's not like I took it any more to heart as anyone does w/ the "I feel sorry for your DH" comments. It just goes to show how vile people can be when you don't validate their stupid ideas. And how it's usually not us "meanies" pull the childish cards.
Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

Oh my gosh tide, I remember that too and it makes me sick. Kudos to you for handling it in such a classy way.

healyl99 · April 2010

omg that post is so old. And I learned from it. That was the whole point of it. She just dug up that post from like almost a month ago. From then I learned and moved on. Duh. And that is the post where someone said they hope my marriage doesn't last and feels bad for my fiance being with me. irrevelant to anything the post was about. geee thanks for bringing up old posts.

healyl99 · April 2010

ok so sue me bc I had a bad idea that my bm should chip in for the bachelorette ok. I understand I had a bad idea and learned from it. But all I got was I am selfish, etc.

salt78 · April 2010

Well thank goodness everyone smacked some sense into you then.

tidetravel · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:4229ee8f-84a8-44ad-8578-32855791c5b6">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]ok so sue me bc I had a bad idea that my bm should chip in for the bachelorette ok. I understand I had a bad idea and learned from it. But all I got was I am selfish, etc.
Posted by healyl99[/QUOTE]

Healy, you're still not getting it. If you ACTUALLY read that post, you'll see that you got good advice at the beginning. It was only after you continually defended the bad idea that the posts got ignorant and silly. If the conversation were to happen in real life, there is a point where people would throw their hands up in the air and say "I give up." or would start banging their heads on the wall. It was at that point that the responses turned "mean."

I'm glad that upon looking back, you've learned that the whole thing was silly. But, if it hadn't gone on to 9 pages of "you're being a tool," would you have changed your mind? Really? Think about it.

xoxob · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:f803b1d3-70c6-42ad-b927-8ad96aa39b72">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]omg that post is so old. And I learned from it. That was the whole point of it. She just dug up that post from like almost a month ago. From then I learned and moved on. Duh. And that is the post where someone said they hope my marriage doesn't last and feels bad for my fiance being with me. irrevelant to anything the post was about. geee thanks for bringing up old posts.
Posted by healyl99[/QUOTE]

It's really funny that you learned from it, because you seemed to think that we were all a bunch of ignorant hoodlums who wanted to be mean to you.

So, what did you end up spending more on, treating your feet scars or the BM gifts?

xoxob · April 2010

Also, Tide. I know you said that person was banned, but I hate them so much for saying that to you.

TroyandKelly · April 2010

1 - You are on the Snarky Brides board
2 - If you don't want opinions, don't ask for them
3 - Next time you post something, consider adding a footnote that says "If you don't agree with me, please don't post comments"

healyl99 · April 2010

who has the time for this seriously. I came on here a few times asking basi c things like music, beauty etc and that was my first time posting about a BM bc as a newbie and all I honestly didn't know the ettiquette or ways of what BM are responsible for. From what I learned, they are responsible for standing up at the alter and thats it.

healyl99 · April 2010

I have "lurked" on the knot and came across a link saying the responsibilities of bridesmaids and if says a heck of a lot more than you just named

healyl99 · April 2010

http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-planning/bridal-party/articles/bridesmaids-duties-in-detail.aspx

list of bm duties

betrothed123 · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:c9eef1af-0b97-48e2-a45a-2046613769d1">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]I have "lurked" on the knot and came across a link saying the responsibilities of bridesmaids and if says a heck of a lot more than you just named
Posted by healyl99[/QUOTE]

No, lurking is reading forum posts without posting your own for a time. You came across links on the portion of the knot that is solely advertising based. Those lists are a product of the wedding industry's push to make brides think they are entitled to everything (therefore spending more money). Please consider the source of your information before taking it as fact. PP is correct about BM responsibilities.

[Deleted User] · April 2010

I would rather claw my own eyes out than ask my BMs to do that bullshit. And of all of that idiocy, this one is my favorite.

Hit the dance floor when the music kicks in. Dance with groomsmen during the formal first-dance sequence. Also, be on the lookout for toe-tapping guests who might need encouragement and/or a dance partner

beatlesgirl25 · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bitchy-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:f2dab78a-6bb2-4ac3-aa09-9d5a174b512fPost:4ce9260e-cf45-4847-8c77-7d28b98957be">Re: Bitchy Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bitchy Brides : No, lurking is reading forum posts without posting your own for a time. You came across links on the portion of the knot that is solely advertising based. Those lists are a product of the wedding industry's push to make brides think they are entitled to everything (therefore spending more money). Please consider the source of your information before taking it as fact. PP is correct about BM responsibilities.
Posted by betrothed123[/QUOTE]

This, all the way. The Knot also gets traffic from BMs on here who are looking for wedding-related stuff for their friends, so this is the kind of article tailored toward them (but also with the end goal of generating more advertising). And notice how the article is NOT directed at brides, to use as a reference to dictate orders to their BMs. It is a suggested set of things to do for BMs who want to have some more direction in being involved in their friends' weddings. But by no means is it required of any BM to help plan the wedding, fetch snacks for the bride, or do any other BS on that list. Why would you want to treat your friends like servants anyway?

tidetravel · April 2010

Aww. Thanks, AP!

You need to get a siggy pic yourself

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