Need some suggestions...

allikl62 · May 2010

I for some reason havent really thought much about the dads and what they will wear, in doing a little talking I realized we have a slightly complicated situation and was hoping you guys could help.

My dad is fine to wear whatever we ask, he wears a suit every day so is comfortable in a suit or a tux. FFIL, on the other hand, is an old hippie and hasn't worn a tie since he was 18. FI is basically insisting that we don't ask him to do that because it would look weirder than him not being formally dressed, he'd be super uncomfortable and he's not really going to be in as many pictures as my dad. And then FI also has a stepdad, who he is not at all close with (his mom remarried when he was 23) but who is also helping out a little bit financially. Our groomsman are wearing grey tuxes.

So the questions are: What do we have the dads wear? What color? Do we put our dads in different things since FFIL won't dress up? Do we have the stepdad dress up too?

I would love any suggestions!! Help me dress our dads!

ejay · May 2010

Have you asked FFIL what he would like to wear? I didn't think my dad would want to wear a tux, but he was the one that asked me, "When should I get fitted for my tux?" and it turns out that he wanted to wear the tux over a suit or shirt and tie.

You may want to just ask him what he feels comfortable wearing... Maybe lead in by saying the guys will be wearing gray tuxes, your dad is wearing x tux, and then ask him if he would prefer to wear a tux, or suit? That way your giving him the options that you would like him to pick from. If he says he wants to wear jeans and a tshirt tell him the venue has a dress code.

jodyk23 · May 2010

Only my dad is wearing a tux since he is walking me down the aisle. The groomsmen will have black ties and vests, FI is wearing a white tie and vest, so I'm having my dad wear a silver tie and vest. Fi's dad and my step-dad and just wearing nice suits. I agree that you and FI should ask FI's dad what he would be comfortable wearing.

allikl62 · May 2010

I haven't talked to FFIL directly, but from FI and FMIL I'm pretty sure he's not up for wearing a suit or a tux. I don't think he would mind dressing up in nice pants and a button up or blazer, its just the tie that he doesnt want.

cmkuno · May 2010

I would have FI talk to him, you might be surprised. My dad is an artist (not quite a hippy, but close) and for reasons I have never understood, always does his best to do the opposite of what everyone else does just to be different. He doesn't even own a suit and hasn't worn one since probably his own wedding, so I was prepared that I might have a hard time convincing him to dress up. But when I asked him what he wanted to wear, he said he preferred to rent a tux! So I guess before you spend too much time worrying about this, I would have FI talk to him about it. He might decide to make an exception for his son's wedding.

But if it turns out you're right, and he refuses to wear a suit and tie, I think you're right that it's really not that big of a deal if he ends up in just dress pants and a blazer. I think your dad can similarly wear whatever he wants to -- we're not really coordinating the dads with each other or the groomsmen.

Knottie1435582995 · May 2010

My dad and FFIL are both wearing tuxes. All GMs, dads, and ushers are wearing the exact same tux. All are black & white. The only difference between them will be in their bouts. DF is wearing ivory rose w/ green hydrangea, BM is wearing peach rose w/ green hydrangea, GMs are wearing green hydrangea, Dads are wearing ivory gebera daisies, and ushers have white hydrangea. The end

Also, DF's dad is a total hippy as well. I'm talking long beard and all. I assumed he'd come in his normal clothes. DF insisted his dad was going to wear a tux. He told his dad he wanted to wear a tux, and FFIL agreed. He even decided on his own to shave his huge/long hippy beard off just for the wedding. It's going to be SOOOO weird seeing him w/o a beard!!!! You never know, your FFIL may WANT to wear a tux, but you have to ask.

If you can, I'd put them all in tuxes. It's so cute for the pics

thecatsfancy · May 2010

My dad, the GM, and the ushers wore tuxes.

On Bri's side, his dad and his mom's S/O both wore a suit. Neither were a big part of Bri's life and neither were a big part of the wedding.

ladysunkissed · May 2010

I agree with cmkuno...neither one of our dads own a suit and my FI and I have never seen our dads in suits let alone tuxes. We asked them if they would like to wear a tux and to our shock, they were both all for it.

If he doesn't want to wear a tux, I don't think it's a big deal. But maybe let him know your dad will be wearing one...just as a FYI. He might get bummed out on the day of the wedding to find out that everyone is dressed to the nines except for him...

Need some suggestions...

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