So, here's what happened.
After a couple days, BF and I ended up talking. I realized that from his perspective, he had no clue what had really gone on. We hadn't taken the time to discuss what issues were coming up between us, and I had bottled it all up inside and exploded basically. I also realized that I didn't want to break up.
We discussed things. We figured out that we both have some personal issues that are affecting our relationship. He's had a hard time with his family. They've been less than encouraging, and it's really impacted his self-esteem. They never really encouraged him to work hard and succeed, and a lot of the time he's just been told he's a failure. I already knew that, but I guess I wasn't aware of how much that affects him and his decisions now.
And for me, I've been well aware that I have some abandonment issues. As soon as I feel like there is a shift in the relationship, I tend to shut down and reject the other person before they can hurt me. So I ended up making an appointment with my therapist, whom I've been seeing on and off for a few years now. I talked to him this morning, and he was really able to help me come up with some strategies on how to deal with this.
I've been putting too much stress on BF with some transitions that have been going, when he needs me to be supportive. And he now knows why I get upset with some of his reactions to life changes. We're both going through some big transitions right now. He just moved further away, started a new job, his grandpa is sick, he's trying to figure out school stuff, and just moved in with a friend. I'm writing my LSAT in 2 weeks, applying to law school in November, and dealing with family issues on top of that.
So we talked about this, and decided that we both felt we'd rather give it some work and try harder than just throw in the towel right now. We both feel really good about this decision. And we've both been clearer about our expectations and our needs, and what we can do to help each other. So I'm feely pretty positive about all of this.