Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)

leia1979 · January 2012

Desert, at the risk of sounding corny, have I told you lately that I love you?

'Cause I do.

DanieKA · January 2012

I don't have a problem with FFF. I think people get called out, on that or during other times, and they take it or leave it. It's hard to have a thick skin over every single thing. Some people's weddings are really, really, (really) important to them. Obviously that's the case with CCO, so she's extra sensitive when we call her out on possible pre-planning and basically having everything set in 8 weeks (I mean, that's crazy fast, but some people live for wedding planning. Others hate it). Whatever, there's no "right" way to be engaged. Some start off strong out of the gate and "enjoy" their engagements after they have everything done. Some do one thing a month for 18 months. Both seem valid to me. I don't personally have a problem with either, though I do understand the annoyance at the amount of WR posts and some other gripes people had on that thread.

What confuses me is that when a newb or a sh!tstirrer or MUD comes along and calls everyone beotches and yells at us b/c we tell them not to pre-plan their wedding to their OMG BF of 4 months, we always rally around this board and say how supportive it is and how rock solid our foundation is and how many of us are friends on FB, offline, etc. We gchat each other, we share really personal things about family dynamics and our health and our relationships. Old Guard and new guard have come here saying some of their very best friends are on this board (Heck, LIv is Lunar's Maid of Honor and they met on this board not even a year ago!) Both OG and newer active posters have attended each others weddings, been there for babies, etc. We really love that about this board and trot out that fact when an outsider starts sh!t.

But when we flame our own it's all "oh this is a wedding board, full of internet strangers! Everyone does it! Thick Skin! Don't take it so seriously!!!!!!! WE'RE STRANGERS! BLAAARGGGGGHHH!!! INTERNETZ!" I dunno, it's kind of why I don't share a lot of my personal life on here. I don't ask for vibes when I have job interviews. I didn't ask for support when my dad had surgery this week. I'm not FB friends with anyone. I just know my limits. I don't want to fall victim to being too comfortable on a board full of internet strangers, only to be slammed over something that I really care about. It's not that I have thin skin, it's just that I realize that most people's response when someone gets their feelings hurt (a normal, human emotion when discussing something personal and important whether online or IRL) is "WE'RE INTERNET STRANGERS! GET OVER IT!" But that's just the dynamic I prefer. I'm more than willing to give support and not seek it out as much, b/c I know I would get hurt. Other OG posters have referenced opening up a little too much, too.

I just kind of find it hard to distinguish between the two mindsets. Either people are friends and this is more than just a message board. Or we're all internet strangers, so toughen up, cookie!

Now, I don't have a problem with people's constructive criticism. And maybe, (definitely) CCO could have handled her responses better. Unfriending everyone off FB is ridiculous and childish. Your friends SHOULD be able to tell you when you are on their f*cking last nerve.Blind support is not my idea of a true friendship. I don't need a bunch of "yes men" in my life. But they should also understand when/if you get it and back off a little. Or realize that she's not getting it and that beating a dead horse is no longer constructive or helpful and move on.

TL:DR- I don't really mind a weekly FFF. I don't think they'll all be like this.

dwest2201 · January 2012

Well, I'm late as usual. I came online late last night and read the entire FFF thread, but then I was exhausted and went to bed so here are my thoughts.

Do you think it will change the dynamics of the board?
We shall see, I'm not too worried about it. The dynamics of everything are constantly changing anyways.

Do you really think it will become a regular thing?
Maybe. I would much rather see people grow a pair and call someone out in the thread, at the time that they are bothered though. I think that FFF is fine and dandy and you really shouldn't take it too seriously if your flamed, but I also think that it's stupid to wait until someone else says something in a FFF post and then have a whole bunch of people go back and forth about it or simply,. 2nd, 3rd, 4th, the post. I am not a FFF expert though, maybe the way that it happened is the way they usually go...? I'm not too worried about it, even if I had been online I doubt I would have had anything too flame worthy of any of the posters, I usually say something if it's bothering me or just let it go and move on.

Will CCO ever come back? She never left, apparently.

Who got their feelings hurt? I think it's pretty obvious who did.

And most importantly...who is at home and drinking tonight? Well I'm eating breakfast and drinking water now, BUT I did have a few glasses of delicious wine last night!

ETA: I missed a ?

DanieKA · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:aa852b78-529e-4ec1-84da-27d53391f108Post:06d075e0-1226-4df3-96f1-c71c0738f9b1">Re: Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)</a>:
[QUOTE]Danie, you said some things I had been thinking far more eloquently than I could put into words. Thanks for that!
Posted by polo1425[/QUOTE]

<div>Aw! Thanks for this:) </div>

loves2shop4shoes · January 2012

Awww man! I can't believe I missed FFF! I didn't even get to distribute my flames! I flame my job for keeping me so busy yesterday!

Epic fail!

And, after having read it all, I will say that I don't think it was offensive AT ALL and was SUPER tame. You guys should have seen how bad the board used to be...

TheMutleys · January 2012

i2i, Desert. I2I! I have said the same exact things to my close friends. I have said "Hey, you are being crazy and getting ahead of yourself." In fact, I called my son's Godmother out on it the other day.

In reference to the whole 'we're internet strangers!' thing, I am NOT friends with everyone on this board and I do consider most people on here strangers. I don't ever plan on being friends with everyone on this board. Not everyone is going to get along. Not everyone goes about life the same way. It still gets down to whether or not you are confident in who you are and what you are doing. If you are not, then you are going to be more butthurt when people say things that just might be oh-so-very-true.

I also think that taking what was actually said and turning it into people saying that you are a bitch is crazy and self-absorbed. (Not that I am surprised on either count. FTR, this means that I think you are crazy and self-absorbed, not that you are a bitch. See how they are different things?) No one even came close to saying that. Oh no, someone got called out and others agreed. Panties got twisted. So effing what.

jaycee7389 · January 2012

Danie, I really don't understand your post. You seemed to jump around with everything you said. The part about MUD and BSCs confused me the most. We DO tell them that it is an internet forum and to get over it, as well as what happened with FFF. I definitely do not think CCO's case was handled like a MUD/BSC case is handled either. She is a regular poster so she was called out but no one was harsh or ripped her apart. I guess I just really have no idea WTF you were trying to say.

DanieKA · January 2012

Mutley, I don't disagree with you. I would quote but my old school iPhone is making it difficult. My point is just that yes, this is the Internet and yes we're not all going to be bff's and hanging out with each other IRL and becoming lifelong friends, but I'm also not going to fault someone for getting a little (emphasis of little) butthurt over a flame now and then. Especially when many posters advise that if you want to become an active and accepted member of the board you need to share as well as offer support. Sharing in a meaningful way is why a lot of posters like this board. Not everybody, of course, but some. And yes, opening yourself up means you might make some awesome friends but you migy also expose yourself to some harsh criticism from people you thought you "knew" better. Is it naive? Absolutely. Is it human? Sure. There are a lot of posters here who care (maybe too much) about what people think of them. I know we should all be super strong and not care. But people do. I don't know if theres a right way and a wrong way to live when it comes to that. And yes, any person's reaction is also what's going to diminish or fan the flames. Name-calling, twisting words and turning one thing into something completely different, mass unfriending like a child throwing a temper tantrum in target, yeah that's f*cking stupid. I'm in no way defending that. But I won't fault someone for initially getting butthurt. A lot of people were. But they manned up and took it like mature adults. It's their reaction that makes all the difference for me.

DanieKA · January 2012

Jaycee, I'm on my phone so it's hard to type. I will definitely try to make my post clearer when I'm in front of my comp. I just don't want you to think this is a post and run or that I'm ignoring you.<div>
</div><div>ETA:</div><div>
</div><div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">In Response to <a style="text-decoration:none;font-weight:normal;color:#1f1f1f;" href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:aa852b78-529e-4ec1-84da-27d53391f108Post:40b5d038-0256-4350-9182-d29f2f8ad6d8">Re: Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)</a>:
[QUOTE]Both OG and newer active posters have attended each others weddings, been there for babies, etc. We really love that about this board and trot out that fact when an outsider starts sh!t. But when we flame our own it's all "oh this is a wedding board, full of internet strangers! Everyone does it! Thick Skin! Don't take it so seriously!!!!!!! WE'RE STRANGERS! BLAAARGGGGGHHH!!! INTERNETZ!" I dunno, it's kind of why I don't share a lot of my personal life on here. I don't ask for vibes when I have job interviews. I didn't ask for support when my dad had surgery this week. I'm not FB friends with anyone. I just know my limits. I don't want to fall victim to being too comfortable on a board full of internet strangers, only to be slammed over something that I really care about. It's not that I have thin skin, it's just that I realize that most people's response when someone gets their feelings hurt (a normal, human emotion when discussing something personal and important whether online or IRL) is "WE'RE INTERNET STRANGERS! GET OVER IT!" But that's just the dynamic I prefer. I'm more than willing to give support and not seek it out as much, b/c I know I would get hurt. Other OG posters have referenced opening up a little too much, too. I just kind of find it hard to distinguish between the two mindsets. Either people are friends and this is more than just a message board. Or we're all internet strangers, so toughen up, cookie!
Posted by DanieKA[/QUOTE]
</div></div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">
</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">Jaycee, I'm assuming this is the part of my post that confuses you. My main point is that at the heart of it, in the beginning, yes, we are all internet strangers. But once you start taking things off the board, whether that's friending on facebook, starting to gchat, calls and texts and cards and secret santas, etc, the veneer of "we're internet strangers" starts chipping away. True or not, or naive or not, letting someone into your life like that appears to moves a relationship away from "internet strangers" and more towards"genuine friends."</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">
</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">So my main issue is that the "we're internet strangers" argument is that it starts to have holes in it when you've allowed the relationship to move past that. I know in this day and age people don't think friending anyone is a big deal. My BF is the same. He'll friend anyone, anywhere without ever having laid eyes on them. But then people know your name. They know your SO's name, your occupation, possibly your family members, conversations you have on FB with people you've known a lot longer than anyone here. It's a real peek at someone's life and I'm not saying I support the thought, I'm not saying people SHOULD feel like this, I'm not saying it's right, what I am saying is that I GET why people feel like they've moved beyond internet stranger and into genuinely making some connections with other people here, so I UNDERSTAND why it can be jarring to then come back here on the board and be told "Pshaw! We're strangers!" </div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">
</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">By creating a level of intimacy off the board (could be a shallow connection, could be deeper), you've chipped away at the e-strangers argument. So I see why CCO could think she was stronger friends than she actually was with people. It's B/C we create these connections without really thinking or really knowing the people here. </div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">
</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">I firmly believe, with a man or a friend, you don't really know someone after 6 months or a year. It takes time to really get to know someone. And you can't rush time. Yeah you can have fun, you can START forming a connection, but to truly know someone takes a while. We wouldn't advise a girl to marry someone after 6 months, but with friends we are so much more willing to rush that connection.</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">
</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">So yes, we tell both new posters and active posters that we're internet strangers, but I think in the case of active posters, once the line starts to blur and communication and connections are formed off the board, that argument no longer holds the weight it would have previously. It's talking out of both sides of your mouth. If you're friends, be friends, connect on fb, gchat, text, etc. if not, don't do those things and then wonder why people get hurt b/c they thought you were better friends than you actually were.</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">
</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">If you're a poster that hasn't taken things off board or offline, then by all means, we are internet strangers and be sure to flame me hard and then use this argument when I get butt hurt. But if there's even a little connection otherwise, I would just hope you'd understand why I would be a bit taken aback. (but my reaction wouldn't be nearly what's been heppening around here). </div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">
</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">I hope that clears it up a bit. </div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">
</div><div style="font-family:Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:10px;background-color:initial;background-image:none;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;color:#1f1f1f;font:normal normal normal 11px/14px Arial, sans-serif;text-align:left;line-height:normal;">P.S. Also, I agree that this has been way blown out of proportion. I didn't add this at the end of the thread b/c I didn't want to propel this dying thread forward. But I did want to come back and answer your question b/c I said I would. </div>

thejucheidea · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:aa852b78-529e-4ec1-84da-27d53391f108Post:0b4fffde-9dd6-4d6d-9241-0b21d607fc98">Re: Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)</a>:
[QUOTE]tl;dr
Posted by BookButterfly[/QUOTE]
And nothing of value was lost.

Elle1036 · January 2012

BookButterfly (if you happen to be reading this):

I'm sorry you feel that this board is not the supportive, awesome place you once thought it was. I understand that this board (and all message boards, really) isn't for everyone, and I totally respect your decision. If you decide that this isn't right for you, you shouldn't stick around.

I do have a couple issues with the way you posted your swan song, though. For one thing, like Beth mentioned, you've indiscriminately called out everyone on here. For another, you don't post very often as you mentioned in your own post). Had you left quietly, chances are nobody would have noticed. The goodbye message really wasn't necessary. Of course, you have the right to say whatever you want, but coming out of the woodwork just to tell us that we're mean and you're not going to play in our sandbox anymore seems kind of... lame.

wink0erin · January 2012

I am NOT a fan of snark and the FFF board left a bad taste in my mouth.

That is the primary reason I don't have many friends IRL, I can't handle the gossipy gang mentality that crops up every now and then. I've ditched a lot of my old friends because they kept talking negatively about others. I despise negativity. It's my belief that if someone here has a problem with someone else, they should say it either in the post that it crops up in, or say it to their face (PM).

So, if FFF becomes a regular thing, I'll probably stop reading/posting here, because I just can't handle that kind of stuff.

I thought everyone here was cool, but maybe I'm just naive. *shrug*

ETA: I say "everyone" because I really do (currently) see everyone as cool. I just have a weird feeling now that FFF came about.

thejucheidea · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:aa852b78-529e-4ec1-84da-27d53391f108Post:6c6c1ccb-d592-4fca-b711-45fe930c4215">Re: Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)</a>:
[QUOTE]... lame.
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]

<a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckForumPage=ForumImage&plckPhotoId=b51f4da3-8ddb-4851-a592-014a1da90995&plckRedirectUrl=http%3a%2f%2fforums.theknot.com%2fSites%2ftheknot%2fPages%2fMain.aspx%2fspecial-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight" title="Click to view a larger photo"> <div style="text-align:center;"><img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/5/5/b51f4da3-8ddb-4851-a592-014a1da90995.medium.jpg" alt="" /></div></a>

Elle1036 · January 2012

I don't get it, Allison. I mean, I know that's Cartman, but I don't understand what you're saying. What am I missing?

thejucheidea · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:aa852b78-529e-4ec1-84da-27d53391f108Post:7ecca6ce-7f4b-4a53-8a61-b63b2d7f5bba">Re: Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't get it, Allison. I mean, I know that's Cartman, but I don't understand what you're saying. What am I missing?
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]
lol it's from the planetarium episode of South Park. Cartman misses the trip to the planetarium because he's trying out for a Cheezy Poofs commercial. He ends up making it to the finals and is in the commercial because every other kid is sucked in by the planetarium. When the commercial comes out, there's someone else who sings 'I love Cheezy Poofs, you love Cheezy Poofs, if we didn't each Cheezy Poofs, we'd be...' and the last word is Cartman standing there in the Cheezy Poofs costume saying 'lame'.

So that's all I think about when I see that word. Cartman standing there dejectedly saying 'lame' dressed as a massive Cheezy Poof.

Elle1036 · January 2012

Hahaha. Thanks for the explanation!

thejucheidea · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:aa852b78-529e-4ec1-84da-27d53391f108Post:f1ac63fd-e9d2-4ac2-bc49-2c5f8bddd8de">Re: Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)</a>:
[QUOTE]Hahaha. Thanks for the explanation!
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]
I can't find a video of the final commercial at the end of the episode, but here's Cartman's original audition: <a href="http://youtu.be/-XlYj1iyAlk" rel="nofollow">http://youtu.be/-XlYj1iyAlk</a>

wink0erin · January 2012

I thought it was Cartman dressed as Kenny =X

thejucheidea · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:aa852b78-529e-4ec1-84da-27d53391f108Post:67daf003-5326-49e7-93e0-2d8dab421016">Re: Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)</a>:
[QUOTE]I thought it was Cartman dressed as Kenny =X
Posted by wink0erin[/QUOTE]
hahahahha

The planetarium episode is one of our favorites.

meamolly · January 2012

I personally did get a little butt hurt, but I do understand how the posts may have fallen into the "ok we get it". While I would have liked it better if they said something right away, once again I understand. That being said, yes we are internet strangers, but I do value your options just as much as I would my co workers. I have gotten to "know" the majority of you and had I known what FFF was, I probably would have skipped it. I guess flame me all you want in the future FFFs, I am avoiding them.

TheMutleys · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:aa852b78-529e-4ec1-84da-27d53391f108Post:4aa2d714-4400-4fc3-9a97-d08d28a76392">Re: Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)</a>:
[QUOTE]I am NOT a fan of snark and the FFF board left a bad taste in my mouth.

That is the primary reason I don't have many friends IRL, I can't handle the gossipy gang mentality that crops up every now and then. I've ditched a lot of my old friends because they kept talking negatively about others. I despise negativity. It's my belief that if someone here has a problem with someone else, they should say it either in the post that it crops up in, or say it to their face (PM).

So, if FFF becomes a regular thing, I'll probably stop reading/posting here, because I just can't handle that kind of stuff.

I thought everyone here was cool, but maybe I'm just naive. *shrug*

ETA: I say "everyone" because I really do (currently) see everyone as cool. I just have a weird feeling now that FFF came about.
Posted by wink0erin[/QUOTE]

FFF was not snarky. <a href="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/11/6/db9c2414-bf15-488e-a6a0-1931cd1c58df.large.gif" title="Click to view a larger photo" class="PhotoLink"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/11/6/db9c2414-bf15-488e-a6a0-1931cd1c58df.medium.gif" alt="" /></a>

Gossiping would be talking about the person behind their back. FFF puts it all out there for everyone to see. I guess I don't see the big deal about it. Maybe because this is all getting blown out of proportion. I still do not see where there were such HORRIBLY HORRENDOUS things that were said. I fail to see this extreme negativity that people are talking about. Someone please point it out to me.

Not everyone is cool. That is just life and isn't a dig on any one person. (Heck, I don't think that I am cool around here. LOL.) It doesn't mean that some people are better than others or that some people are extra cool. I mean it in the sense that not everyone is going to be cool with each other. Some people can be annoying. Some people are extra annoying. I don't see the big deal if someone finds me annoying or disagrees with how I do things.

Seeing as how this is a group forum, I think that PMing someone is pointless and takes it to a level that is more serious. I didn't need to PM CCO to tell her what I thought. There would be no point in that.

I definitely feel like this entire ordeal is stupid. It is stupid that anyone would think that it is going to change the board in a big way. I can only see positive things coming out of it. <a href="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/3/1/a39e1d72-1b2e-4f3c-917f-4e6385ece09b.large.gif" title="Click to view a larger photo" class="PhotoLink"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/3/1/a39e1d72-1b2e-4f3c-917f-4e6385ece09b.medium.gif" alt="" /></a>
<a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckForumPage=ForumImage&plckPhotoId=a39e1d72-1b2e-4f3c-917f-4e6385ece09b&plckRedirectUrl=http%3a%2f%2fforums.theknot.com%2fSites%2ftheknot%2fPages%2fMain.aspx%2fspecial-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight" title="Click to view a larger photo"> </a>

<a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight?plckForumPage=ForumImage&plckPhotoId=db9c2414-bf15-488e-a6a0-1931cd1c58df&plckRedirectUrl=http%3a%2f%2fforums.theknot.com%2fSites%2ftheknot%2fPages%2fMain.aspx%2fspecial-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_will-fff-change-dynamics-of-board-anyone-drinking-tonight" title="Click to view a larger photo"> </a>

thejucheidea · January 2012

I love you so much, Mutley. For srs.

Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)

Re: Will FFF change the dynamics of the board? (And is anyone drinking tonight?)

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