In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_sweetheart-table-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:dbdadd11-02e8-4a6d-92bb-f7733941a367Post:be776d26-ba9a-491c-bfa6-41ec468da949">Re: Sweetheart Table?</a>: [QUOTE]I just don't get why it's so rude! Do what you wish! That's all... to each his own! Posted by omglah247[/QUOTE]
It's rude because you're splitting up an established social unit based on the desires of the bride and groom.
Established couples should be seated together. To split them up, particularly at an event centered around everlasting love is rude.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_sweetheart-table-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:dbdadd11-02e8-4a6d-92bb-f7733941a367Post:f5dc3022-f543-4097-a62b-db529a0ffed3">Re: Sweetheart Table?</a>: [QUOTE]I don't understand why people think it looks somehow pathetic to see the couple sitting alone. It's not like they don't have any friends; EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN ATTENDANCE is there for the couple, so it's not like they're there alone or that no one wanted to sit with them. They're just choosing to have a bit of privacy on a very public day. I cannot possibly fathom the thought process behind it being "sad." Posted by aerinpegadrak[/QUOTE]
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_sweetheart-table-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:dbdadd11-02e8-4a6d-92bb-f7733941a367Post:3921e98e-e22a-49e3-b373-13a670721652">Re: Sweetheart Table?</a>: [QUOTE]Awesome idea...as for separating you...don't! Just put the table in the middle of the reception!! It is so much nicer than a head table which, in my opinion looks silly andddd separates people from their date. STILL, it is your wedding so go with what makes you the most comfortable Posted by Heather Wood[/QUOTE] I like this idea! The more that I think about it...a sweetheart table isn't for me. I think they are fun and cute but I don't think that I want to do that. I do like the idea of having all of us, wedding party and dates, at a table in the middle of the guests.
So those of you who think you shouldn't separate a couple, have you never been separated from your significant other? Most people don't need to rely on having their partner next to them at all times. As I said earlier, my fiance has been in 3 wedding parties where I wasn't seated with him during dinner (and 2 the other way around), but I didn't need to eat with him. He was there because of his friend (who was also mine) and was able to enjoy the dinner with the bridal party. I enjoyed it with other partners who were also my friends, none of us needed our partner there to be able to eat. No one even expected to be seated with their partner, but that may be more of a tradition in NZ, and therefore expected. I've never heard anyone complain about it though. It's only an hour or two anyway!
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_sweetheart-table-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:dbdadd11-02e8-4a6d-92bb-f7733941a367Post:5e591ee2-2cd5-4f19-b82d-7fd51331590b">Re: Sweetheart Table?</a>: [QUOTE]So those of you who think you shouldn't separate a couple, have you never been separated from your significant other? Most people don't need to rely on having their partner next to them at all times. As I said earlier, my fiance has been in 3 wedding parties where I wasn't seated with him during dinner (and 2 the other way around), but I didn't need to eat with him. He was there because of his friend (who was also mine) and was able to enjoy the dinner with the bridal party. I enjoyed it with other partners who were also my friends, none of us needed our partner there to be able to eat. No one even expected to be seated with their partner, but that may be more of a tradition in NZ, and therefore expected. I've never heard anyone complain about it though. It's only an hour or two anyway! Posted by adrop[/QUOTE]
It isn't about what I CAN do. I survived for nearly a quarter century without DH as my SO. However it's rude to split people from their SOs at a social event.
And why would you want your wedding to be something that your guests can "survive" or "manage"?
Wouldn't you rather it be a time where your guests have a great time?
I didn't "survive" or "manage", I "had a great time". I can have a good time whether my fiance is there with me or not. I guess customs are different in the US because it's not rude to split a couple where I come from if one of them is involved in the bridal party. It's the norm. At least I certainly hope that no one at my wedding thinks that I'm being rude!
And FI and I have been separated at many weddings - including my own sister's. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to upset anyone, but yes, it was rude, and yes, we would have had a better time sitting together than apart. And that's been true even when I've known other people at the wedding.
Planning Our Wedding - Updated 04/11/11 "If you can't think of something nice to say, don't say something nice" - Stephen Colbert
How we've decided to set it up is to have a circle table (sweetheart table) in the middle, there will be a walking space on each side of our table, and then we will have a long rectangle table on each side where the bridal party and their s/o's (or guest) will be sitting. That way we can still have our head table (as I do like the idea of the HT) but we can also have the sweetheart table, without it looking super lonely and pulled away from everything else. This is what works for me. Wouldn't work for everyone, but I like it =]
We are not doing a sweetheart table. I do not like them and I think they make the B and G look pathetic. We are doing a table of 6 with ourselves and our MOH and her date and BM and his wife. The rest of teh bridal party will be at tables of 8 on either side of our table. Plus one of my BM's is a sil I don't enjoy being around so this saves me from having to sit with her.
I think you should do what makes you happy, but I just have this to say about a head table. Having to sit at one was the most awkward thing I have ever done. I was one of 3 MOH in my friends wedding and my fiancee and another MOH's husband had to sit way in the back and didn't have anyone to talk to because they didn't know anyone. we were all sitting up on a platform with nothing to do and no one else to talk to but ourselves. The bride and groom were up talking to everyone, but we just had to sit there. It was terrible. So, I think a sweetheart table is a fine idea, but however you do it, be considerate of your attendants and their SO.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_sweetheart-table-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:dbdadd11-02e8-4a6d-92bb-f7733941a367Post:7bc63965-7bd7-4b1d-8886-0be0b42b9a32">Re: Sweetheart Table?</a>: [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Sweetheart Table? : It isn't about what I CAN do. I survived for nearly a quarter century without DH as my SO. However it's rude to split people from their SOs at a social event. And why would you want your wedding to be something that your guests can "survive" or "manage"? Wouldn't you rather it be a time where your guests have a great time? Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]
As far as the whole "separating SO's" thing goes...a wedding is a celebration of love. Yes, I can be away from FI for an hour. Because of differing work schedules, until now, we've spent a lot more time than that apart. But if we're somewhere celebrating love, I'd much rather celebrate love with the one I love.
Plus if we were separated, we'd just end up making weird faces/gestures at each other from across the room, and everybody else would be weirded out.
Re: Sweetheart Table?
[QUOTE]I just don't get why it's so rude! Do what you wish! That's all... to each his own!
Posted by omglah247[/QUOTE]
It's rude because you're splitting up an established social unit based on the desires of the bride and groom.
Established couples should be seated together. To split them up, particularly at an event centered around everlasting love is rude.
[QUOTE]I don't understand why people think it looks somehow pathetic to see the couple sitting alone. It's not like they don't have any friends; EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN ATTENDANCE is there for the couple, so it's not like they're there alone or that no one wanted to sit with them. They're just choosing to have a bit of privacy on a very public day. I cannot possibly fathom the thought process behind it being "sad."
Posted by aerinpegadrak[/QUOTE]
I couldn't agree with you more.
[QUOTE]Awesome idea...as for separating you...don't! Just put the table in the middle of the reception!! It is so much nicer than a head table which, in my opinion looks silly andddd separates people from their date. STILL, it is your wedding so go with what makes you the most comfortable
Posted by Heather Wood[/QUOTE]
I like this idea! The more that I think about it...a sweetheart table isn't for me. I think they are fun and cute but I don't think that I want to do that. I do like the idea of having all of us, wedding party and dates, at a table in the middle of the guests.
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[QUOTE]So those of you who think you shouldn't separate a couple, have you never been separated from your significant other? Most people don't need to rely on having their partner next to them at all times. As I said earlier, my fiance has been in 3 wedding parties where I wasn't seated with him during dinner (and 2 the other way around), but I didn't need to eat with him. He was there because of his friend (who was also mine) and was able to enjoy the dinner with the bridal party. I enjoyed it with other partners who were also my friends, none of us needed our partner there to be able to eat. No one even expected to be seated with their partner, but that may be more of a tradition in NZ, and therefore expected. I've never heard anyone complain about it though. It's only an hour or two anyway!
Posted by adrop[/QUOTE]
It isn't about what I CAN do. I survived for nearly a quarter century without DH as my SO. However it's rude to split people from their SOs at a social event.
And why would you want your wedding to be something that your guests can "survive" or "manage"?
Wouldn't you rather it be a time where your guests have a great time?
And FI and I have been separated at many weddings - including my own sister's. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to upset anyone, but yes, it was rude, and yes, we would have had a better time sitting together than apart. And that's been true even when I've known other people at the wedding.
"If you can't think of something nice to say, don't say something nice" - Stephen Colbert
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Sweetheart Table? : It isn't about what I CAN do. I survived for nearly a quarter century without DH as my SO. However it's rude to split people from their SOs at a social event. And why would you want your wedding to be something that your guests can "survive" or "manage"? Wouldn't you rather it be a time where your guests have a great time?
Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]
I second this.
Plus if we were separated, we'd just end up making weird faces/gestures at each other from across the room, and everybody else would be weirded out.