S/O Body Image

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

My mom told me that if I lost five lbs I'd look better in my wedding dress - so I can sympathize with you too.

Except I'm pretty much ignoring her because she's obsessed with body image, to the point where I know it damaged one of my sisters enough to anorexia in high school.

I'm 5'4, 135, and I freaking love my body - you girls need to appreciate yourselves a lot more and give yourself more credit. If I lost five lbs, I'd lose it in my ass - and that's my fiance's favorite thing. I couldn't do that to him

lol

AmoroAgain · August 2010

Man, my mom's got no room to talk about losing weight so if she'd said anything to me, I would have just given her the devil eye.

katiewhompus · August 2010

I have good days but I voted rarely because honestly, 90% of the time I hate my body. I don't feel hot or sexy and I don't think anyone (other than Scott) has checked me out in quite some time. I have lost 15 pounds but still feel like no one would want to see me in a bathing suit, and I haven't worn shorts in over 10 years because I think my legs are absolutely disgusting. The funny thing is I work with some people who are heavier than myself but who I think are absolutely gorgeous. I hated myself at 170 to the point where I only ate 500 calories a day and covered all of the mirrors in my house, and I still hate myself at 155.

So yeah, that got kind of long and out there...

squirrly · August 2010

I've got weight in funny places that I didn't used to gain before, and I'm not a huge fan of that. But, really, I'm probably too OK with my body image. My tummy's less than perfect, but I've got kick-ass boobs, so I wear a bikini anyway.

I'm 5'7, and about 140, although that goes up or down 3 - 5 pounds, depending on stress and such. I weighed about 105 or 110 when I started college, which was definitely underweight. If I could set a magic number for myself, it would be about 130, I guess, because that's what I weighed when the pouchy stomach didn't exist.

I'm much more prone to thinking my body is fine but that my face is unattractive, honestly. I'm not entirely sure why, but I suspect middle school boys are a completely valid group to lay blame on.

jnic0319 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_body-image?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:7b414933-6619-4e86-9906-8f44f611407ePost:78bef80c-0955-432b-8aad-a1b1eed0de70">Re: S/O Body Image</a>:
[QUOTE]My mom told me that if I lost five lbs I'd look better in my wedding dress - so I can sympathize with you too. Except I'm pretty much ignoring her because she's obsessed with body image, to the point where I know it damaged one of my sisters enough to anorexia in high school. I'm 5'4, 135, and I freaking love my body - you girls need to appreciate yourselves a lot more and give yourself more credit. If I lost five lbs, I'd lose it in my ass - and that's my fiance's favorite thing. I couldn't do that to him :) lol
Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

yeah i've lost my boobs, and FI is not happy- but at the same time he's a stomach guy and that's my problem area so I'm trying to balance them...this is all too much stress haha

andy71781 · August 2010

I said rarely because although I like the way I look a lot better than I did before (I'm a size 4 now - used to be size 12) I still constantly poke, prod and pinch my body and I hate my cellulite. When I'm doing races I feel strong and then I like my body.

awolfe2 · August 2010

I've actually lost a lot of boobs, which is sad because I didn't have a lot to lose. I think my mom is trying to be helpful, it's just annoying sometimes. She lost about 40 lbs later in life and regrets not being thinner and healthier when she was younger. There's also a history of high blood pressure and cholesterol in my fam so she doesn't want me to have serious health issues with that.
Shout-out to FIs who love our bodies! I always tell him when my mom makes a comment and he told me that he'll think I'm beautiful no matter what I look like! ...and to not lose my butt.

kayakrunhike · August 2010

My mom told me years ago I shouldn't wear tank tops because my arms wouldn't look good. I weighed less than I do now by probably 10 lbs. Granted, I lift now, but my arms weren't exactly flabby then. Once I started earning my own money, I wore tank tops as much as possible around her, bc I knew it drove her nuts.

She asked why everything had to be sleeveless when I showed her my rehearsal dress, and I finally let her have it (although I wasn't angry). I told her I was proud of my body, the muscle I'd gained in my arms, and the weight I've lost, and I was going to show it off. She really shouldn't be criticizing me, given her own weight, but yeah. I swear I will never, ever do that to my children.

waltzingmatilda13 · August 2010

I said rarely, too. All through college I was skinny and after I gained about 60lbs. It all came on really fast so I thought something was wrong, but my doc did a bunch of tests and no, I just ate too much junk food and my metabolism hit a brick wall. I still can't convince myself that I can't eat everything I want anymore because I will gain weight. It doesn't help that my sister eats like a bird and is probably a size 2. Most days I hate getting dressed because everything feels to tight and I'm ashamed to have to buy the clothing size that actually fits. Not that anyone can see what size I wear unless my tags are hanging out, but it still makes me feel like crap.

H always tells me how beautiful and sexy I am, but I think it wears him down too when I talk about how I see myself.

Wow, that's more than I've told anybody but my H about my weight before.

Meg1979 · August 2010

I have a weird relationship with my body. For example, when I go to the beach I don't care how I look in a suit. I just go swimming and enjoy myself. I don't feel squeamish about my body during romantic times (TMI? Dunno). However, when I saw the engagement pictures we just took, I was horrified. I just don't look healthy. I look like I'm struggling. So, I've started walking and lifting weights. We'll see how I feel soon.

GJones27 · August 2010

On a scale of 1 to 10, I'd give myself a 6, maybe a 7 on a great day. No one except my fiance tells me I'm pretty, so I guess that colors my opinion. I don't really have issues with my weight (100 pounds, 5'2"), though sometimes I wish my thighs were a little thinner. My body image issue is my face. I had to get my jaw widened when I was kid for orthodentic reasons, and I now have a heavy jaw and broad face. It's really hard for me to style my hair with that jawline.

emilyinchile · August 2010

I said Yes because aside from the occasional day, I'm happy with how I look and with what I can do exercise-wise.

Roxy, I agree with what you're saying about being too skinny. I followed my dad's genes in terms of having a fast metabolism, and I've lost weight just as a product of getting older. I've had a couple acquaintances with their own admitted body issues make comments about how I'm so lucky to be skinny and eat what I want, but I also know that there have been negative comments. The love/hate relationship with thinness in our society is definitely a little weird.

sgervais88 · August 2010

<p>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_body-image?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:7b414933-6619-4e86-9906-8f44f611407ePost:5d4df5b5-2942-4d5f-974f-c32b84fba04d">Re: S/O Body Image</a>:
[QUOTE]I voted usually - I still sometimes have issues with being flat chested. Overall I love my body, but trying to find fun lingerie is difficult when you're barely an A - it seems that everything sexy is made for girls with at least a B cup.
Posted by direy25[/QUOTE]

THIS. x10.</p>
<p>I hate being flat chested. I like my body most of the time, except for having such a small chest. I am naturally petite, 5'1" and hovering around 100 to 105 pounds. I can not gain weight no matter how hard I try, and I do try. I would love more than anything to have some curves and not look like a 14 year old. I am a senior in college and I look like a middle schooler.

It was so awful in high school, being called "misquito bites" and "flatty". I have never felt like I look like a woman, and I can't fit into anything age appropriate. I'm hoping that as I get older my metabolism will slow down and I can have curves.</p>

thesuninherhead · August 2010

It took me 8 years of fighting my body and being in and out of treatment for my eating disorder before I realised that I'd so much more to define myself by than a number on a scale, and that no one else was judging my worth by my thinness.

Now, the main insecurities I have come with being thin. I'm naturally thin, but in light of my history, I do get paranoid sometimes that others are judging my size (family and friends who knew me when I was ill). I don't let it get me down in the slighest, though. I treat myself with respect and enjoy the freedom and positivity that comes with letting go of such neuroticism. It wasn't just my mindset which changed to help me get to this point; I restructured my whole life around doing the things that I enjoyed and surrounding myself with supportive, positive people. Although it's addiction that needs to be managed like any other, I am confident that I will never succumb to anorexia again. I have too much else in my life to live for, and the idea of defining success by my size seems ludicrous in light of my other achievements and capabilities.

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