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People Are So Rude

nlindsay17nlindsay17 member
Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
 We just had my DD's wedding this past Saturday. It was a winter wonderland theme. Some of her centerpieces were silver manzanita trees with hanging gems. I can not believe how many people were taking the gems off the trees in the middle of the reception. I would never go to a wedding and tear apart the centerpieces.
 One of my ex sister in laws comes up to me at the end of the wedding and asks if she can take the table number. I said no and explained that my DD worked hard on making those so she wants to pass them on to another bride. They wouldn't be much good missing the number 5. She tells me ok I'll leave it and then took it anyway. Now we have to travel back to the next state to purchase another five and base and make it all over again so all the work on the others is not wasted.
 Another guest apparently went into the bathrooms and emptied out both hospitality baskets.
 It just baffles my mind how rude people can be. We gave out nice favors but apparently that wasn't enough for some people.
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Re: People Are So Rude

  • niobesmumniobesmum
    10 Comments
    OMG...thats terrible. I hate people that do that or just assume that you wont want or need these items after the ceremony. An invitation to a wedding to not a ticket to get free things!!
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  • littleluckypennylittleluckypenny member
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments
    I never understood how many people take things that aren't "glued down".  Taking an extra cupcake or favor, yeah I understand that, but taking gems off the centerpiece?  Crazy.
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  • Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    i agree all points are rude, except maybe this one:

    Another guest apparently went into the bathrooms and emptied out both hospitality baskets.

    and that's because people are supposed to take stuff (although one person shouldnt take everything)
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  • mari0225mari0225
    1000 Comments
    That is awful, who starts taking numbers off tables and tearing up centerpieces? It just baffles me.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    I would cut those people out of my life for behaving so appallingly. How trashy.
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  • nlindsay17nlindsay17 member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments
    I understand the hospitality basket is there for guests to take things they need during the wedding. That is the reason I did them. At the end of the wedding there were still quite a few things left and someone helped themselves to all of it. That is rude.
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  • mica178mica178 member
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its
    You do realize that you are criticizing your own guests?  If similar things happened at my wedding (they didn't, thankfully), I'd be embarrassed of H's and my friends and family and just shut up about it rather than blast on the internet that they suck.
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  • nlindsay17nlindsay17 member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments
    @ Ranchers We just need to do the missing number so it's a complete matching set. If it was the number 13 it would have been different but you need the number 5.
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  • achiduckachiduck member
    5000 Comments 5 Love Its
    Not cool.
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  • ElleB87ElleB87 member
    1000 Comments
    Wow that's ridiculous. What the heck is that person going to do with a table number?? The hospitality baskets don't bother me that much but the centerpieces and table numbers are just plain crazy.
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  • Habs2HartHabs2Hart member
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Mica - Your logical...ness? (is that a word? If not, it is now) is not welcome here. 
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  • chelseamb11chelseamb11 member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    Definitely rude. That being said, you'd be even ruder if you did anything about it to try and get the stuff back, so just revel in the fact that they made complete assholes out of themselves and leave it at that.
     
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  • ebhavensebhavens
    10 Comments
    I for one, appreciate this post, as I am about to get married and have some rented tall vases, that I do need to worry about.

    Thank you for posting, I will have my wedding staff look after the rented items, thanks to this post :)

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  • jcg98jcg98 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:e752a7a6-51db-4a68-a525-da169ed3d5b0">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]That is pretty strange.<strong> I hope nobody takes our centerpieces because we are renting the majority of the items that will be used.</strong> Flowers I could care less about. Do you really need to re-make the table numbers? Like your daughter already has someone she is giving them to? That is super weird that someone would want the table number.
    Posted by rachers1017[/QUOTE]

    We rented amber votive holders from our florist to match our CPs, and when we rounded them up later about 10 had been taken.  I never thought that would happen (there were favors at each place).
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  • rebarobert2012rebarobert2012
    500 Comments

    It is pretty weird that people took apart the centerpieces.  What if they had been rented and you had to return them?  Sometimes people just don't think.


    It is also weird that she took the table number.  I mean, what would she do with the random number 5 table number anyway?

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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:fbb06ff2-de02-4ef7-ae6c-8d4f1c70c6dc">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]You do realize that you are criticizing your own guests?  If similar things happened at my wedding (they didn't, thankfully), I'd be embarrassed of H's and my friends and family and just shut up about it rather than blast on the internet that they suck.
    Posted by mica178[/QUOTE]
    sweet burn
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  • chumlee7478chumlee7478
    100 Comments
    What is someone going to do with a completely random #5 table card? Display it? So weird.

    My venue coordinator warned me that people really do take everything that isn't nailed to the table or floor. One of my BMs offered to do the bathroom baskets, but when I asked my coordinator, she said those are the first things taken (baskets and all).  I realize the point is for the items to be used, but why are people walking away with the baskets?

    One of my friends had rented vases and crystal candle holders for her centerpieces.  At the end of the night, all the vases were there, but 8 of the holders were missing.  She lost her deposit on the rental for "losing" the items, and she was really upset about it.  We all went to a friend's house for a party a few months later, and his girlfriend had the candle holders from the wedding displayed in the dining room.  My friend, the bride who had rented the holders, was furious when she saw them.  The guy's GF had just taken them from the wedding that night, along with almost everyone's favors from that table, and some of the venue's champagne flutes.  We all recognized the flutes as we were drinking, SINCE THEY HAD THE HOTEL NAME ON THE BOTTOM OF THE FLUTES. 

    I cannot believe what some people think is OK to do in life in general. 
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  • annie912annie912 member
    100 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:fbb06ff2-de02-4ef7-ae6c-8d4f1c70c6dc">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]You do realize that you are criticizing your own guests?  If similar things happened at my wedding (they didn't, thankfully), I'd be embarrassed of H's and my friends and family and just shut up about it rather than blast on the internet that they suck.
    Posted by mica178[/QUOTE]

    This was her ex-sister-in-law at her daughter's wedding (so I'm assuming it's her ex-husband's sister, daughter's aunt). I wouldn't be embarrassed at all. Given my relationship with my ex's family, I'd probably put an ad in the local paper. Just kidding, but still. I don't see what the big deal about her venting about it is or why she should be embarrassed.

    The hospitality basket, eh, whatever. But the centerpiece? Especially after she asked as was told no? Super rude and tacky as hell.
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  • chumlee7478chumlee7478
    100 Comments
    Rachers-- my friend kept asking us what we'd do.  I honestly was just so stunned that not only someone would steal from a wedding, but that they'd have the guts to display the holders right in front of the person they had taken the holders from. 

    My friend didn't say anything that night, but she wasn't acting like herself.  She was really upset.  The next day, the guy that threw the party called her and asked what was up.  She told him, and he was beyond furious with his girlfriend.  He hadn't noticed the candle holders at the reception (what guy really does notice the centerpieces??) and when he commented on them at home, his GF told him they came from Pier 1 or something.  He didn't think anything of it until my friend told him.  He looked at the bottom of the holders, and there was the rental company name.  He made his GF return the holders and pay the bride back the deposit money she lost.  It was an all around bad situation, he was mad at his GF, we all knew what she'd done, and no one was comfortable having her at their events since we weren't sure if she'd do it again.
    Report Reply
  • NuggetBrainNuggetBrain member
    5000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:19457c9d-e11c-4215-9ea0-9fdae39c0c02">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]What is someone going to do with a completely random #5 table card? Display it? So weird. My venue coordinator warned me that people really do take everything that isn't nailed to the table or floor. One of my BMs offered to do the bathroom baskets, but when I asked my coordinator, she said those are the first things taken (baskets and all).  I realize the point is for the items to be used, but why are people walking away with the baskets? One of my friends had rented vases and crystal candle holders for her centerpieces.  At the end of the night, all the vases were there, but 8 of the holders were missing.  She lost her deposit on the rental for "losing" the items, and she was really upset about it.  We all went to a friend's house for a party a few months later, and <strong>his girlfriend had the candle holders from the wedding displayed in the dining room</strong>.  My friend, the bride who had rented the holders, was furious when she saw them.  The guy's GF had just taken them from the wedding that night, <strong>along with almost everyone's favors from that table, and some of the venue's champagne flutes.  We all recognized the flutes as we were drinking, SINCE THEY HAD THE HOTEL NAME ON THE BOTTOM OF THE FLUTES. </strong> I cannot believe what some people think is OK to do in life in general. 
    Posted by chumlee7478[/QUOTE]

    PLEASE tell me you called her out on her ish.  Seriously, the reason people keep doing that is because nobody ever calls them out on their ish.
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  • Habs2HartHabs2Hart member
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    A couple of my friends were really drunk and left with the wine glasses they were still drinking out of when the cab came and picked them up.  They didn't realize it until later.  It's kinda funny though.  The venue never said a thing to us. 
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  • baystateapplebaystateapple member
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:184da01f-189d-4f0e-ab58-d79da368c5b2">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]Rachers-- my friend kept asking us what we'd do.  I honestly was just so stunned that not only someone would steal from a wedding, but that they'd have the guts to display the holders right in front of the person they had taken the holders from.  My friend didn't say anything that night, but she wasn't acting like herself.  She was really upset.  The next day, the guy that threw the party called her and asked what was up.  She told him, and he was beyond furious with his girlfriend.  He hadn't noticed the candle holders at the reception (what guy really does notice the centerpieces??) and when he commented on them at home, his GF told him they came from Pier 1 or something.  He didn't think anything of it until my friend told him.  He looked at the bottom of the holders, and there was the rental company name.  He made his GF return the holders and pay the bride back the deposit money she lost.  It was an all around bad situation, he was mad at his GF, we all knew what she'd done, and no one was comfortable having her at their events since we weren't sure if she'd do it again.
    Posted by chumlee7478[/QUOTE]

    That is really great that he stood up to her like that and held her accountable for her actions.  Good for him.  I'm sure that was horribly, horribly awkward though.
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  • chumlee7478chumlee7478
    100 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:5ffddde4-df6f-4dea-8202-5dbc2ce9f04f">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: People Are So Rude : That is really great that he stood up to her like that and held her accountable for her actions.  Good for him.  I'm sure that was horribly, horribly awkward though.
    Posted by baystateapple[/QUOTE]

    Super awkward.  We all attended an enagement party about a month after he made her pay my friend back.  I tried to put it out of my head, but I still found myself side eyeing her every time she opened her purse.  That probably makes me a horrible person.  But I now know how she got the stuff home in the first place. Those huge envelope style clutches hold a TON of stuff!!!!
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  • chrmunchrmun member
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:fbb06ff2-de02-4ef7-ae6c-8d4f1c70c6dc">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]You do realize that you are criticizing your own guests?  If similar things happened at my wedding (they didn't, thankfully), I'd be embarrassed of H's and my friends and family and just shut up about it rather than blast on the internet that they suck.
    Posted by mica178[/QUOTE]

    Isn't that what the internet is for?  If I was in her position, I'd probably be doing the same thing.  You can bet that if people do trashy sh!t at my wedding, I'm gonna be venting about it on here.
    Of course, I will point out that it is probably a bad idea to mention it to any of their mutual aquaintances.
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  • Matty143Matty143
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:e752a7a6-51db-4a68-a525-da169ed3d5b0">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]That is pretty strange.<strong> I hope nobody takes our centerpieces because we are renting the majority of the items that will be used. Flowers I could care less about</strong>. Do you really need to re-make the table numbers? Like your daughter already has someone she is giving them to? That is super weird that someone would want the table number.
    Posted by rachers1017[/QUOTE]

    If your Venue has a DOC for you, ask your florist to contact them and let them know what is rented. The coordinator will make sure that people don't take your rented vases and what not.
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  • niobesmumniobesmum
    10 Comments
    um Nugget...where did you get that pic in your sig?
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  • NuggetBrainNuggetBrain member
    5000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:c8bca2dc-4c92-4b8a-8d3f-37465c0f51ce">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]um Nugget...where did you get that pic in your sig?
    Posted by niobesmum[/QUOTE]

    The NAACP website.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    10000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:fbb06ff2-de02-4ef7-ae6c-8d4f1c70c6dc">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]You do realize that you are criticizing your own guests?  If similar things happened at my wedding (they didn't, thankfully), I'd be embarrassed of H's and my friends and family and just shut up about it rather than blast on the internet that they suck.
    Posted by mica178[/QUOTE]

    It was her daughter's wedding, so her daughter's guests (or would it still be considered the daughter's guests if OP 'hosted'? I don't know the rules on that). But I really don't see the difference of someone bitching about their wedding guests versus anything else people complain about on here.

    I've seen many a reg complain about something tacky or trashy one of their wedding guests did, with no backlash. 
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  • Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
     At the end of the wedding there were still quite a few things left and someone helped themselves to all of it. That is rude.


    so it was the end of the wedding.  i dont think this is a big deal then.  emptying it at the start?  yeah, rude and lame.  at the end when everyone's going home?  who cares? 
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  • mari0225mari0225
    1000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-are-so-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:367a1d47-e625-4511-af4e-dafba6c449fbPost:fbb06ff2-de02-4ef7-ae6c-8d4f1c70c6dc">Re: People Are So Rude</a>:
    [QUOTE]You do realize that you are criticizing your own guests?  If similar things happened at my wedding (they didn't, thankfully), I'd be embarrassed of H's and my friends and family and just shut up about it rather than blast on the internet that they suck.
    Posted by mica178[/QUOTE]

    I think if it happened to me I would be venting on here too, better on here than to those friends and family about how rude and tactless they are.
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