Invited to a shower hosted by my BFF, for someone I don't know, and to whom's wedding I'm not invite

Re: Invited to a shower hosted by my BFF, for someone I don't know, and to whom's wedding I'm not invite

• Anysunrise member

  

  March 2012

  I just wouldn't go. I also wouldn't say anything about the etiquette issues, I don't think there's really a way to say it that wouldn't come off condescending.

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• goobersinlove member

  

  March 2012

  Definitely don't go.  Maybe ask her why she invited you in the first place? It would be interesting to hear her answer...

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• sparent2010 member

  

  March 2012

  Just don't go - 

  

  

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• DramaGeek member

  

  March 2012

  RSVP no.  Since she's your best friend, I would assume you have the kind of relationship where you could say "by the way, why did you invite me?  Did you need moral support or something?!"

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• muffin1986

  

  March 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invited-to-a-shower-hosted-by-my-bff-for-someone-i-dont-know-and-to-whoms-wedding-im-not-invited-to?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:64979770-4d66-4532-9593-8408a14c432ePost:fa114fcd-66e5-4835-ba10-8d0daa526ce4">Re: Invited to a shower hosted by my BFF, for someone I don't know, and to whom's wedding I'm not invited to</a>:
  [QUOTE]RSVP no.  Since she's your best friend, I would assume you have the kind of relationship where you could say "by the way, why did you invite me?  Did you need moral support or something?!"
  Posted by DramaGeek[/QUOTE]
  
  <div>
  </div><div>She is and I usually can just say things to her... but she's VERY sensitive. She generally takes things the wrong way, which is why I'm asking for advice.</div><div>
  </div><div>Thank you for your responses!</div>

  

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• muffin1986

  

  March 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invited-to-a-shower-hosted-by-my-bff-for-someone-i-dont-know-and-to-whoms-wedding-im-not-invited-to?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:64979770-4d66-4532-9593-8408a14c432ePost:59f74447-1222-423d-bc5a-850104a0f151">Re: Invited to a shower hosted by my BFF, for someone I don't know, and to whom's wedding I'm not invited to</a>:
  [QUOTE]Definitely don't go.  Maybe ask her why she invited you in the first place? It would be interesting to hear her answer...
  Posted by goobersinlove[/QUOTE]
  
  <div>When I talk to her, I'll be sure to post her response! </div>

  

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• afeliz79 member

  

  March 2012

  I just wouldn't go and I definitely wouldn't say anything about the etiquette faux pas.

  

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• J&K10910 member

  

  March 2012

  You don't ever have to go to something you're invited to.

  
  
  Everything the light touches is my kingdom.

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• meganb1977 member

  

  March 2012

  Exactly.  If you don't want to go, you can politely decline.  It was your friend who breached etiquette by inviting guests to the shower who are not invited to the wedding.  You would not breach etiquette by sending your regrets.

  Whoever said it was supposed to be happily ever after is a big fat liar.

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• SparrowSong member

  

  March 2012

  I would not have a problem saying. "WTF BFF, I've never even met this person? Are you crazy? WTF do you think I want to come to this for? I don't even enjoy showers for people I know, etc etc etc."

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• Viczaesar member

  

  March 2012

  I would just decline.
  
  I had just about the same thing happen, only it was the bride's bachelorette party that my BFF was helping to host and invited me too.  I had met the bride once a few months earlier when I happened to go with her to try on wedding dresses (long story how that came to happen, but I actually had fun).  While at the bachelorette party, which had a pleasure party and a stripper pole with stripper instructions, the bride invited me to the wedding which was the next weekend, and I ended up going to that too.  Technically wrong, but I actually had a great time at each event. 

  
  
  
  

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• rebarobert2012

  

  March 2012

  I would just RSVP no to the shower.  I wouldn't say anything to your friend about inviting you to the shower when you aren't invited to the wedding, though.

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• MJandDL

  

  March 2012

  I would decline but I'm sure since she is your best friend she will ask you why you are declining. I would probably make legimate plans to be doing something else on that day and if she persists I would tell my bff that I don't want the bride to feel uncomforable having someone there that she doesn't know. Is your bff hosting the shower? Tell her that if she needs to bounce ideas off you you'll be happy to listen and you can't wait to hear about how it turned out!

  "When life hands you lemons, make a beef stew." Andy Milinokis

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