so.. FMIL & i have a therapy session tonight to hash out the issues between us. i've been dreading it for the last 2 wks, but stuck to my guns about going through with it. things have gotten so bad, we need to do something to try to move forward. FMIL did make an effort last wknd, and i began to think maybe i should call off the therapy session, but decided against doing so. she has not followed through on anything she said in our phone conversation, and i realized that the little "talk" that FI had with her at lunch on friday (to ask her to be more considerate towards me) must have only sunk in for a wknd's time. yesterday i asked FI to confirm with FMIL that she would be showing up at therapy. he responded by saying yes, but that he apparently also had to be there. i let him know that the therapist had said for him to not be there, that it was between FMIL & i. so i go home to find out what the deal is. apparently FMIL tracked down our dr's name, and EMAILED her, stating that she REFUSES to show up without her son there. the dr said that she would have to talk to me first. FI talked to his mom last night and she continued to refuse to show up unless he was there, despite the fact that he does not want to be there, and does not feel that he should be there. then ensued the official stamp of craziness-we had to call the therapist on her cell to figure out what to do. the dr said that FMIL is trying to control the situation, bc that is what she does, but that she, as the professional, will not allow her to control anything bc it is her situation to control, not FMIL's. FI can show up if he wants, but the dr said she will not allow him in the room bc i don't feel comfortable with it and don't want to put him any more in the middle than he's already gotten. it isn't fair to him. the dr said to anticipate FMIL storming out and refusing the session. FI said to her, with tears in his eyes, that if she does that it will answer my questions and his questions as to just how much effort she is willing to expend on working towards resolving this. he hung his head, and told me that he can deal without seeing his mom for the rest of his life, but he would miss his dad. he told me that i am where his loyalty lies, not with her, and he is extremely upset by the fact that she is doing all of this and not acting her age. at this point i feel horrible, i have apologized so many times for this situation being what it is, even though he tells me it isnt my fault. i feel like the cause of all of it, and the thing that is getting in between him & his mom. we could both use some major vibes for strength to get through tonight, whatever happens. the dr said that this is a process and it may take a few sessions, but i think FI is ready to just move on after tonight, as am i. i don't know what is going to happen tonight, but whatever it is, it is going to S-U-C-K! fyi: july has been a really rough month for me/us. so much drama. we can't wait for august!