Name Change advice!

emerlyn · August 2009

Hi all!So, I haven't changed my name yet. I am not sure what I want to do, tack it on the end, hyphenate, or change all together. I was wondering, if I don't change my name legally, do I still call myself Ms. (maiden name?) eventhough i'm not married?Here are my reasons for not changing my name-1) I am Jewish, and that is part of my identity, so don't want to lose that2) DH is chinese, so i'll have a chinese last name I am not sure I want to totally give up my Jewish identity, and have a Chinese last name....i'd like to just add it like thisAlyssa Meredith Maiden Marriedthat is the way some of my friend have it. But then, can I sign things First Maiden, or First Married sometimes?? SO CONFUSING! It may be easier just to hyphenate it. It just seems annoying- on all legal paperwork the name will have to by hyphenated....Sorry, this sounds confused, but so am I!!

AlexiaANDRobert · August 2009

I like the First Middle Maiden Married. But when you sign your name it's First Married. Personally, I don't think your name is your "identity" that's defined by who you are as a person.It's up to you though - everyone is different. But you can't switch up your signatures.

bcnoelle · August 2009

It's a confusing subject! I think I am going to keep my name as is for my profession/career but change it for my personal life. I'm not sure how to really do that or if I never change anything and just go with the flow when someone calls me Mrs. (FI last name). I think calling yourself Ms. is fine since it can be a Miss or a Mrs. I know a lot of women who drop their middle name completely and insert their maiden name in its place. I have 2 middle names (one is my mom's maiden name). I would say do whatever you think sounds good to you!

skhynes · August 2009

I also know a lot of people that dropped their middle name and replaced it with their maiden name. Could that be an option for you?

sunflowr0803 · August 2009

I agree with PP's. I think you should either do: 1) Alyssa Maiden Married or 2) Alyssa Meredith Maiden Married.Either way you get to keep your maiden name but take Stephen's last name. Then you won't have to hyphenate. You'll still have to sign your new last name, but your maiden name will still be a part of you. Maybe you can sign it Alyssa M. B. "Married." WDYT?You would be called Mrs. Married (not Ms. Maiden), bu t officially your maiden name would still be part of you!

BananaMustang · August 2009

My mom hyphenated her last name, and then my sister and I were given her maiden name as a second middle name.So hyphenated or not, if you choose to have kids, this is another way your maiden name could be carried on.

KuteBride09 · August 2009

WOW!!! I just went today to the social security office and had to finally pick what i was going to do. I went with my maiden name as my middle name and took his last name. That way i still have a part of my dad and my new husband is happy too! Its really all up to you. HTH!! :O)

JoShan1719 · August 2009

I'm not taking FI's last name. I love my name. I understand what you mean about your last name being a part of you. My last name is Italian, and FI's name is very cookie-cutter American. I'd hate to lose that Italian-ness. I'm still going to use "Mrs. HisName" socially, but all my documents will be "Shannon MyLastName."

ericak926 · August 2009

I am planning on using my maiden name as my middle name and professionally I am going to hypenate.

cjbwifey2010 · August 2009

As many others, i plan on using my maiden name and adding on his last name (so it will be Jessica Maiden Married). My situation is easier because i never even had a middle name! LOL. I was thinking about the whole hyphenating thing but the name would just be too long. i love my last name (even though it is common in the haitian community) bcuz i feel like its something special that i got from my daddy (a true daddy's girl...he even gave me my first name) and i dont wanna mess with that, but I would love to move up in the alphabet and i know that FI wants me to have his last name and i want it too! So that's my decision...i hope that is something that you can consider...if your middle name isn't all that important to you!

Theresa626 · August 2009

Hello Alyssa, It's Theresa, how are you? I don't have too much advice for you but I would understand if you still wanted to use your maiden name. What are you going to have your students call you?

Name Change advice!

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