Ive been doing so much research on this and I could not have written this post better myself! I see this was a few years back but I am having the same issues.. I was so surprised to see the negative replies... Did you ever find a good solution to this? I was going to ask for a decline only rsvp.. I just feel like if you absolutely know you cant come why would I waste your time sending another invite.. lol maybe thats selfish but I need to stay under 100 and Id like to know in advance who else I could fill your spot with. Sorry for random post! Thanks for any advice in advance!