wedding vent

suedoe · August 2009

So, I have changed the date of my wedding from April to Oct 2010 for several reasons. I talk to my sister and she asks when the wedding is and I say "October!" She says, "Whaaaat?" Apparently I had to consult with her (she's the MOH and daughter and son are also in the wedding). Anyway, she gets all upset and sounds like she's going to cry because she wants to be at my wedding but can't take the kids out of school. I said just come for the long weekend and she says she can only come once a year(she's OOT). So, now I feel guilty and don't know what to do.How did you guys pick your wedding days?

MissSarah786 · August 2009

I'm a teacher, so my wedding day was based on when I had time off. However, I would have rather has the wedding in September. I'm assuming your sister thought the wedding was in April and you then changed it. How far OOT is she?

Nebb · August 2009

My husband didnt care when we got married so he told me to pick a day, my job at the time was busier at the end of the month so I had to choose a day mid month so I could take time off work, I wanted to get married in July. I had a choice of July 12th or the 19. I chose the 19th.

ootmother2 · August 2009

That's a holiday weekend, isn't it? AND it's over a year out so she should really make plans accordingly.I'm sure they could miss that Friday from school and Monday is a holiday

Brie2010 · August 2009

I kind of think that you should have at least mentioned it to her before changing it. She's got a legitimate reason for possibly not coming, and it's not really your place to tell her to "just take a long weekend," especially when it involves taking kids out of school.We picked our wedding date because we loved our reception venue, and they had only one Saturday in May 2010 still available. We took it and ran with it.

ootmother2 · August 2009

Monday, October 11. 2010 is Columbus day. I don't get it

mwhitson14 · August 2009

We picked ours so that my brother would be back from guard training. The 24th was close to our anniversary, so we picked that date. We had plans to change it to the 10th so we could go somewhere during fall break, but money is tight so we're going to hold off and kept the 24th.

nooniesinlove · August 2009

We wanted to wait until I graduated college, and then we waited until we moved to the DC area where our jobs are. Most parishes in the Catholic Church require that couples marrying must give six months notice to the church before the wedding date, and most parishes don't allow weddings during Lent. By the time we moved and chose our church, we only had three weekends that fell between the six month mark and Lent; one was the day before the Super Bowl, so we just decided on the earlier of the two left.

sarabellam · August 2009

We picked ours in September because it was the first Saturday of my September break from school. Oot, not all schools get Columbus Day off. I remember getting the day off when I lived in NY, but haven't had it off since I've been working in schools (albeit all in the south) since 1990.

suedoe · August 2009

My sister is a plane ride away and she wants to take her vacation at the time of the wedding. She can only afford to fly here once a year so she can't come for just a weekend. I think she's being practicel(spelling?). I suggested V-day(I know, I know) and she liked that better because it was school vacation but I don't know if I want V-day. I's kind of sappy.

sarabellam · August 2009

Then you need to decide what is more important to you, having your wedding on a potentially sappy date, or having your sister, niece and nephew there.

Brie2010 · August 2009

I suggested V-day(I know, I know) and she liked that better because it was school vacation but I don't know if I want V-day. I's kind of sappy.A Valentine's Day wedding doesn't have to be "sappy." As long as you don't vomit pink and red and hearts and cupids over it, it's just like any other wedding.If my choice were between having my sister/niece/nephew there and having a "sappy" date, I'd take the bad date, hands down.

suedoe · August 2009

Thanks for all your input. It is really important that my sister and her family are there. I will talk over the V-day date with FI and if he's ok with it then maybe I will be too. Thanks again!

thesportsgal21 · August 2009

"Can't" take the kids out of school? Of course she can. She is their mother she can do whatever she wants. I think she'll be able to catch them up on their long division during the long car ride. Isn't Valentine's day during the school year as well? If I were you, I'd stick to my date. She'll find a way to make it. That excuse is fine for your college roommate, but not your sister and MOH.

tlv204 · August 2009

Sportsgal I think that's really rude and inconsiderate. Clearly the sister wants to be there, but it's rude to put her in a situation where she actually can't afford to come to her own sister's wedding. I'm not a huge fan of valentine's weddings either, but I agree with PP and would rather have my sister there. Also, I would rather not take my kids out of school for a wedding, I think school is more important.

katiewhompus · August 2009

I picked it because May 1st was an important personal day to me. It happened to fall on a Friday but that worked out fine.I'm just curious with the age of her kids though...isn't school still in session in April?

ggmae · August 2009

Well, our wedding was originally set for October 10, 2009. Then my brother told me last November (after we had booked our venue) that he can't make the wedding because of Army obligations. So, immediately I was on the phone with venue and vendors trying to figure something out for May 2009. We decided we wanted to move the wedding up rather than push it back to 2010, when both my brother and cousin would be deployed. We were given the choice of 3 days in May and chose May 30 because SIL and a BM of mine would be out of college by then and it'd be easier for them to make it.

BubbleJ · August 2009

My original date was 11th of Feb, however after finding out my graduation is usually the week after that (which would place me on honeymoon) we changed it to March 3rd so I could graduate and get married

thesuninherhead · August 2009

We picked based on what was free, and of course worked around immediate family requests. Surely your sister can make it for the weekend- if she can only come once a year, and she could make april, can't she change it to October?

sammi1285 · August 2009

Okay, you should have asked her first if you already made concrete plans for April BUT I think your sister is being extra difficult here. What is the difference between having your wedding in October 1010 and February 2011? Since that is a different year she can automatically come? Those dates are only 4 months from each other. I understand her not being able to afford to fly out very often, but you are giving her over a years notice to plan and save accordingly. A wedding is a once in a lifetime thing and I don't think you should have to plan your date for the *one*week out of the entire year she decides she is able to take a vacation. Maybe you can help her look for solutions so that she can come to an October wedding. She can take a local April vacation or do something that doesnt involve buying plane tickets and then fly out for a long weekend in October. I know she wants to be able to take her vacation then, but since you are her own sister she should be able to change her plans around for you. Sorry, I just kind of have to give the side eye that isn't not OK for you to get married in October because of her kids and finances, but everything is all good for you to get married in February, 4 months later when the kids are still in school.

swelniak · August 2009

and they wouldn't be looking for a tv/constantly checking their phones for score updates haha. shockingly, we've been informed by an LSU fan that they're playing georgia that day and asked "did you realize that??" ha!

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