? for you married ladies

jweis11 · August 2009

So I kind of feel like my non-married friends since I have become married have stopped inviting me places. It just seems that things I would be invited to prior to 7/11 now I'm not really thought about? I don't know (It could be all in my head) however, did any of you ladies feel this way?

PensChick20 · August 2009

Perhaps they are assuming you guys want to be together all the time right now since you are newlyweds. It kind of happened to me, then we all got married except a couple of people then it went back to what it was like before the wedding. Its stupid people assume you are supposed to be cut off from everyone right after the wedding..yeah you are excited you are married but you don't need to spend every waking second with each other!

morganphd · August 2009

No clue. We were the next to last in our group to get married. Sorry that I'm no help.

themissizz · August 2009

We've definitely noticed it which is weird because we were together for almost 7 years before we got married so it's not like we didn't always go out as a couple for years upon years.

jweis11 · August 2009

yes, this is what i'm talking about. I do love spending time with DH but it doesn't mean we want to be cut off from the rest of our friends...I know things will probably get back to normal (I hope) but I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going crazy and that also that this is a pretty normal thing that happens.This is going to be P&R I have an 8am mtg on the other side of the county...sighhave a good day girls!

KimWard · August 2009

I hear ya- not so much about not being invited places (b/c all of my good friends are back in PA), but I feel like I don't talk to them as much, esp. my one BFF/BM. I know it's probably in my head- she's got some pretty crazy work schedules sometimes. Honestly, life in general is just keeping me busy- not necessarily b/c I'm married. Hopefully everyone will adjust soon and your friends will return to normal! Maybe through some subtle hints that you also would like to see that particular movie they mentioned, etc.

e8jackson6 · August 2009

Not really - although for the most part, our friends who aren't married are in serious relationships already - so that probably makes a difference as well.It may have been different if we had a lot of single friends.

dreamalotmp · August 2009

Not so true for me because of two reasons: 1) Almost all of my friends (aside from friends from here that aren't hitched yet, but soon will be) are married and 2) My single and/or divorced friends go out later at night and a lot more to clubs than I like, so I lamely say no to a lot of invites. :P

skybluejen · August 2009

I think if I still lived in Pittsburgh this would be the case for me. I only have 2 sets of friends that are married, a few that are engaged, and tons that are single and crazy. My best girlfriends who are single don't care that I'm married, though I can sometimes tell that they think I'm old and lame now

Here in DC we have several friends who are either married or living with the S/O's, so I don't notice it. We do everything in couples

McBridetobe · August 2009

The majority of my girlfriends got married within the past year or are getting married this year...it is kinda funny how it worked out that way.My biggest issues is getting together with them, since we do not live near each other. It is beyond frustrating because my Pittsburgh friends often want to get together over holidays, which is next to impossible for me - I'm home over the holiday to see my family...and 1/2 of the holidays we are with DH's family. So I feel like I am always saying no to getting together. My friends that live farther away always want to go away together....which is just not possible for us. We're saving for a house, a baby, etc...and if we are going on vacation or away for the weekend, we do kinda just want that to be us. I also wish my DH and their DHs/FIs were friends. He is meh about a lot of them and I'm meh about a lot of his friends' wives and GFs...there are only a few locally that I could really be good friends with. It is frustrating and I wished we all still lived down the street from each other.

It takes work now, which is sucky. Sorry I turned your post into a venting session.

AMK2009 · August 2009

Definately happened to me, although I think it started long before we were married. Most of my friends are single, as in not married and no boyfriends, so they spend their weekends going out to the clubs, which I have no interest in doing. Every month or two, we try to get together for dinner or brunch or something though, which is nice.

kwynn · August 2009

Like stace, we'd been together for awhile (five years) already before getting married. I was already spending every single holiday and vacation flying down here to see my DH anyway. I actually have had two or three friends break engagements, so that is always awkward too. (There were 4 of us at my work engaged to be married this year and only 2 of us actually got married). I think for me, it happened over time. As I got more serious with DH, I became less into going out a lot. My friends are also scattered around the area and it makes it really hard to get together (a friend in AZ, a friend in NYC, me in FL, a friend in PA). I actually created a "calling schedule" and I call each of my friends every few weeks to chat, just to touch base. FB and all that really helps too.My friends are mixed in that half are married or living together and half are single. But I've never felt intentionally excluded.I will say that my "drama" threshold is very decreased now. My sister says that I don't understand because I'm married (she's single and close in age), but the things that go down between girls is just frustrating when she tells me.

jweis11 · August 2009

well thank you for all your posts ladies...I don't feel like such a loser anymore..haha plus I always have you ladies

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