Hey girls. Ok, so my mother is driving me bananas again. And I need advice.
So, as you know, FI and I recently went to Maine and found the wedding venue of our dreams. I called my mom yesterday and told her how much I love the venue, gave her some details, etc. and told her I printed her some pictures we took so she could see how awesome it was.
Then last night, FI and I went out to dinner with his mother and her BF. So, we're at dinner...and my mother called me 5 times throughout the course of dinner. She left me voicemails saying, "I've been trying to get a hold of you. Call me back TONIGHT."
So I call her back while I was in the car with FI, FMIL, and FMIL's BF. My mom said she was thinking about it, and she thinks I need to keep looking for other venues. She said the venue is too expensive, it's too far away, and it charges guests too much money to stay over there. The cabins up there are $300/night, but they sleep 5-6 people. So I don't think it really is that bad.
And she just kept biitching about how it's 400 miles from NY and how it's "asking too much of the guests." I told her that anyone who couldn't afford it or thought it was too much of an imposition didn't have to come, and really, what am I supposed to do here? Have a 40k wedding in Boston that I can't afford and drown in debt? Have a wedding in Boston that I can afford that will not be as nice and be pissed off that I'm eating my wedding dinner off of plastic plates? Have the wedding in Jersey (like she wants) to make it more convenient for her?
No matter where I have the wedding, I'll have guests from NY, CT, Vermont, Massachusetts, South Carolina, Florida, Portugal, and Italy. So, no matter WHERE I have it, there will be a lot of OOT guests. I tried explaining this to her, but all she keeps saying is "I'm trying to explain this in a way that you'll understand this."
Finally I told her, "Mom, I'm not an idiot. I understand what you're saying and the ramifications of what you're saying. I just don't agree with it." I ended the conversation by saying "Thank you for that perspective. But I have no interest in engaging in a circular argument with you, so I'll call you in the morning." And I hung up.
I was supposed to go to her house for the weekend. I need to handle some bank errands with her tomorrow. And I really need to...I'm broke and the errands I need to run, she HAS to be present at. We were supposed to stay for the weekend through Sunday (when I have my cousin's bridal shower to attend) and then come back to MA.
But I REALLY don't want to go down there if this is the kind of nonsense I'm going to have to deal with.
Please give me advice on any of this. I can't think clearly because I'm too upset.