Black Tie Wedding - Yes or No

Re: Black Tie Wedding - Yes or No

• caraellen23

  

  July 2010 edited December 2011

  Congrats on your engagement!  Tell us about yourself and your fiance.
  
  If you decide that's the type of wedding you want, then I don't really think its rude.  I guess it would depend on your crowd.  Are they people who would be comfortable in a tux? Would some of your guests already have tuxes? 
  
  Another idea is to do black tie optional. This indicates that its a more formal event and guests are encouraged to wear tuxedoes (and women can wear long dresses), but it doesn't require anyone to have/rent a tux.  We are doing this for our wedding. I know that all of my parent's friends (a majority of the list) already own tuxes, so its not a problem for them.  Anyone who doesn't want to get a tux would be comfortable in a dark suit.
  
  If you do choose to have a black tie wedding, I would look into what etiquette states is acceptable for black tie just for some guidelines.  Technically, it should start after a certain hour of the day and there are other traditions that go along with it.  Good luck planning!
  

  

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• Stacylynn702 member

  

  July 2010 edited December 2011

  Welcome to our board and Congratulations!  Hopefully, you'll find us helpful. 
  
  I agree with everything Cara said.  I think a black tie affair sounds beautiful and I don't think it's rude at all.  I do think black tie optional would be easier on you though if not everyone on your guest list owns a tux. 
  
  On the other hand, people rent hotel rooms, airfare and all sorts of things for weddings so this really might not be that different. 
  

  

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• ooodsie

  

  July 2010 edited December 2011

  I love the idea.. I think if you keep it small, close friends/family will be more than willing to rent a tux for the occasion, it's your wedding after all.  If you were inviting coworkers or not so close friends then I would be inclined to say black tie optional, but it sounds like you're trying to stay intimate which is great.  

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• laurak43 member

  

  July 2010 edited December 2011

  Obviously you know your guests better than us but if you can think of any of them that this would be a problem for then I would go optional.  with so many people out of work it might be tough for some of them to swing the cost.  With all the weddings, including our own, for us this year I know money is tight for everyone.
  
  I can't really relate to wanting a black tie wedding because even our bridal party won't be wearing tuxes.  my fi thinks the satin stripe on the pants look silly.  Everyone has different tastes though.

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• KaitlinMoria member

  

  July 2010 edited December 2011

  Thank you all so much for your feedback! As of now, I think I am going to have to go Black Tie Optional. I would love to make it Black Tie, but I want people to look forward to coming to our wedding, not dread having to go buy/rent a tux, etc. I was told that 95% will most likely wear a tux anyway, so I can deal with the other 5%! The great thing is, our date is May 2012, so I am pretty sure I have some time to sleep on  it. Haha.
  
  My fiance's name is Ryan and he is a golf professional. I played golf in college and am working to get my LPGA certification to be a teaching instructor. I also work for a Marketing and Sales company in Chester Springs, PA. We are in the process of buying our first home, hopefully to move in early January. After that, I will have a little over a year until the wedding.
  
  Our ceremony is going to be at St. Thomas of Villanova chapel. Thinking about heaving reception at Overbrook Country Club, Philly Country Club or Aronimink County Club. A reception at a golf course is only fitting, have any suggestions/comments on those venues, or possible other ones on the Main Line?
  
  

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