Wedding Cakes & Food Forum

not a fan of sweets

My fiance and I both are not into sweets whatsoever, and about a third of our guests are not as well. Any alternative ideas, also is it rude to not provide sweets for the ones that do enjoy them ( I know my grandparents may be bummed ) I don't want to miss out on the tradition but I also don't want to spend money on something that I'm not excited about that could go towards something else. I joked about a tier of cheeses, my favorite. :)

Re: not a fan of sweets

  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    What you serve should reflect what you enjoy, BUT it should be geared towards your guests.  If 2/3's of your guests are sweets eaters why would choose not to serve them?  Plan for the majority, not your personal preference. When last DD was choosing menu/wine/cakes/desserts for her wedding I reminded her a couple of times " Is that choice based on what your guests like, or only on what you two like?"  That made her rethink her choices a couple of times. If 1/3 of you all don't care for sweets, just don't eat them!  Don't take dessert away from the majority though based on that.
  • mindiosumindiosu member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Agree with pp that you should consider all of your guests in this.  One idea is to have a coffee bar. I went to a wedding that offered this and it was fantastic! Those of us into sweets could use flavored syrups and add a biscotti and those that were not could do a plain latte, etc.  If you still want to do the traditional cutting, you could do just a smaller cake for the amount of guests you think would eat a slice.
  • edited December 2011
    I am new to the whole wedding planning, but what happened to the idea that a wedding is about the two people getting married and their personal reflections to share with their guests. We obviously want our guests to enjoy their time at our wedding but cakes are expensive, so maybe I'm just being cheap, but I would much rather put money towards other things that will be enjoyed by all not some. Maybe I will just do a smaller cake, or cupcakes...
  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    You are right that the WEDDING is for the couple.  It should be a reflection of them.  The RECEPTION is your thank you to your guests for coming and you are hosting them.  it's not a party FOR the couple, it is a party where the couple thanks the guests and provides appropriately. There is nothing wrong with cupcakes or something other than wedding cake - they can be cost prohibitive for some.  My point was you wanted to get rid of dessert because you and your FI don't care for it and about 1/3 of your guests probably don't either.  This is where you cater to the majority.  Like I said, with the last DD to get married - I asked more than once if she chose reception foods/drink based on what the 2 of them liked or what would be appealing to their guests.  You don't throw a party for a lot of people and only serve what you care for. That sounded a lot more harsh than it's intended, please believe that.  For me, the cake is my favorite part.  don't care what you serve for dinner as long as it didn't swim when it was alive.  If I got a cheese tray for dessert I'd be kinda disappointed. cupcakes, pies, brownies, etc.  Lots of different choices.  doesn't have to be wedding cake if it's not in your budget.
  • edited December 2011
    I disagree with the last post.  I am with you 100% with not being a fan of sweets, specifically wedding cake.  In fact, my fiance and I decided to do away with the cake as of a month ago. You shouldn't be catering your wedding toward's your guest's preferences.  If you did that, you would have a hodgepodge of odd requests and demands.  This is not what your wedding day is about. The reception should be a reflection of your own taste and preferences.  With that said, a variety of choices (such as different flavored cupcakes) would be suitable and most likely satisfy everyone's sweet tooth.  Regardless, you will not be able to satisfy everyone!  This is your day, do what you want!  
  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Nobody told her to try to satisfy everyone.  The point was that when you are choosing FOOD, you have to choose for the masses and not ONLY your personal taste.  Please reread what I said.  Choosing foods and drinks to please your guests is what is known as being a gracious host.  There was nothing in there about guest requests or suggestions. 
  • edited December 2011
    I get it some people maybe disappointed with no wedding cake . What I was mainly trying to get at in this forum is alternative ideas to a wedding cake. I'm not eliminating sweets completely but I do want somethng different that is personalized that guests will enjoy. The espresso idea was cute, I've also thought about doing fresh berries that are seasonal and local and maybe doing some kind of whip cream with them. If anybody has different ideas I would love to hear them.
  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    The berries and cream would be a wonderful choice.  It's kind of luxurious, not too common, and delicious.
  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Hit the button too soon.  My 3rd DD got married in May - into an Italian family.  Cannoli were a must or the marriage wasn't valid.  They also had cheesecake and different kinds of cake too.
  • MesmrEweMesmrEwe member
    First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    I'm with what kmmsg is saying ALL THE WAY...  SIL did the "it's MY wedding and I'm going to serve food only *I* like"... Well, she still whines to this day that 95% of her guests left the second dinner was over before even the first dance could start... (and their ONLY reason they left) because they were HUNGRY...  She chose a french plated meal with mystery meat and some tablespoon of goop on the side with a mini slice of cake for dessert...  The reception is about the guests, you can choose foods you like, but you also have to consider will my guests like this too..  Sure, you may not like cake, but no one who likes cake ever complains about getting a second slice at a wedding since the portions are so small anyways, if 2/3 guests get a slice that is 1/3 bigger of a delish slice of cake, I can assure you, NONE of them will complain.  Or, if they have a slice to take home for a snack late into the evening, no one complains about that either.  If you don't like cake that much, then do a dessert buffet with more savory desserts added, your cheese tray idea, fruit tray, dark chocolate truffles, fruit tarts, chocolate dipped strawberries, berries & cream, frozen lemon cups, etc. with only a small cake to satisfy the tradition if you want.  There are a lot of ways you can still have dessert to satisfy the clear majority of your guests without throwing the baby out with the bathwater. 
  • edited December 2011
    You could have a fruit table where your guests could dip their fruit into different varieties of chocolates and syrups, or simply have the fruit plain.  It's fun, interactive, and way less costly than a huge cake.
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