Ohio-Cincinnati

bridesmaids shoes

Did you all have your bridesmaids wear matching shoes? I'm having tea length dresses and all my bridesmaids have very different styles, so I kinda wanted to have them all order the same shoes.  But when I emailed everyone the pair I'm interested in ($50 at DSW), half of my bridesmaids haven't responded (and its been almost 2 weeks) and one of them made a comment that she didn't want to buy them until she had a coupon, so I'm feeling guilty asking them to buy them.  What do you all think? I'm not making anyone get their hair, nails, makeup, any of that stuff done... it would just be the shoes and the dress. What do you think? Thanks!

Re: bridesmaids shoes

  • edited December 2011
    I didn't ask mine to do anything other than find a floor length black dress that they felt fabulous in.  They each picked their own dresses, their own shoes, their own jewelry, their own hair, their own makeup, etc.Personally, I'm not a fan of the matchy matchiness that dominates some wedding - I'd rather my girls find something that they look and feel fabulous in, and that they'll wear again because they truly love it.jmho...
  • edited December 2011
    I agree with pp about letting them pick whatever shoe they want, then atleast they can buy a shoe they might get more use out of. I Like pictures of wedding parties and different shoes.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • afloggieafloggie member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My girls are all wearing the same dresses but they can buy whatever shoes they want.
  • edited December 2011
    Maybe she's hard to fit.  I hate buying matching shoes.  In my BFs wedding, the 'cutesy' shoes we wore for the wedding were off before the pictures were done- for all of the bridesmaids.  I gave them away.  I told my girls as long as they're black, I don't care. 
  • EABinkholderEABinkholder member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am trying to keep costs down for all of my girls so I told them just to get a bronze or gold shoe that they liked, but then we found nice looking short heeled bronze shoes at Off Broadway for $18 a pair and we went with those. I didn't care if my girls had matching shoes, but they were all going to have to buy some anyway, so they agreed to get the cheap ones! I would just let them do whatever they want with shoes. No one is looking at their feet anyway, honestly! Good luck
  • edited December 2011
    My Bridesmaids are wearing long dresses. My only comment on shoes was for them to wear dark (black or brown) close-toed shoes. If you have a specific pair in mind, you could always have that as part of their gift? $50 is alot for shoes if you don't plan on wearing them again...
  • edited December 2011
    I have been in many weddings where I had to buy a specific dress, shoe, and have my hair done a certain way.  I would think that most bridesmaids are aware this is a possibility and would be willing to do whatever the bride wants.  If you feel strongly about it, talk to each one about the shoe.  I am likely having tea length dresses as well.  My 5 bridesmaids are in 3 different states so shopping together isn't practical.  I want the "matchy-matchy" look for dresses but for shoes I will probably just pick a color (silver or champagne) and tell the girls to buy whatever shoes they want in that color.
  • edited December 2011
    I'm not having my girls wear the same shoes, but they are also wearing black dresses, so I'm sure they already have a pair of black heels! I am considering buying them some cute flip flops to wear at the reception though. How much were their BM dresses and what color are they? Is it something hard to match?
  • weigllmweigllm member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I can see where you are coming from emie on wanting everyone to have matching shoes because they are wearing tea length dresses. It's a completely different situation IMO if your girls are wearing long dresses because the shoes aren't likely to be seen as much as when wearing shorter dresses. I don't think it's unreasonable to ask them to wear the same shoe especially if you aren't expecting them to pay for hair, nails, makeup, etc.  My only suggestion would be to try to find something that is less than $50 if they're having an issue with buying the same shoes. 
    image
  • edited December 2011
    Thanks ladies! I actually told them all this morning they can get their own shoes and now all of them are like "are you sure??! we can all get the same ones!" I guess thats the sign of good bridesmaids :) But I do agree with you all so thanks for your input!
  • edited December 2011
    emierenfeld,That's great that your bm's are being so accommodating - and that's great that you were willing to take a step back and offer them that chance.  I think sometimes when brides tell their bm's that, a lot of bm's feel like it's not genuine, or they feel a little lost about what to get.  If you're getting that impression from them, maybe you could suggest to them the color of the shoe to get, or maybe the style (i.e. closed toe, or open toe, or strappy sandle, etc.)  That way they have SOME direction for you, but are still free to buy something that they like, will more likely be able to wear again, and will fit within their budget.
  • dschuck23dschuck23 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My bridesmaids are wearing tea length black dresses and I'm planning on telling them to pick whatever shoes they feel comfortable in.  I am almost 5'10 and had to wear 3" heels in my best friends wedding a few years ago.  The guy I had to walk with was significantly shorter than me and it was super uncomfortable.  I am having the same situation in my wedding because they are all different heights.  My Maid of Honor is my sister who is also 5'10 and the best man is shorter than her.  I just want everyone to be comfortable so if they are short they can wear 4" heels and if they are tall they can pick ones they want.
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