honour mother who passed away

Re: honour mother who passed away

• caraanddj member

  

  October 2009

  I'm not really sure of ideas on how to work in a mother/son dance, but there is a song called " Me and You Against the World" that is beautiful and is about the relationship between a son and a mother. Perhaps if FI's grandmother is still with you, she could dance with him? Or...I know this would probably be something that would make your FI sad, but perhaps instead of the dance, there could be some kind of slide show of pictures of FI and his mom to be shown while the song is playing.A lot depends on how FI would feel and how your guests would feel about it. I know you said you do not want to open any wounds, and I'm sure others from FI's family are still hurting.Or... You could decide not to do the dance and do a memory candle or table and an announcement in your programs. I am sorry for your losses (both your FMIL and your father).

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• kmmssg mod

  

  October 2009

  Whatever you plan, your FI, his father, siblings, and close maternal family should all be on board and approve.  The last thing you want is for your well intentioned tribute to send his mothers siblings, his dad, his siblings, etc into sobbing fits.  This wound is fresh and it will be difficult for these people to not feel their loss even more on your wedding day. Whatever it is, you need concensus among those people and no surprises.  Sometimes less is best.  Let your FI and his family take the lead on this.

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• nefariousmoon

  

  October 2009

  For the song: you could always play what was her favorite song, and he could ask either a grandmother or aunt to take her place during the dance. Or even have the whole family join it.

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• On_Cloud_Nine member

  

  October 2009

  I really don't see how a "dance" would work. He could dance with his grandmother or an aunt. But I honestly would skip the dance altogether. My mother passed away 2 years ago, and we're going to have a small table with a rose, or something similar to that effect. I also plan on having a rose placed on the seat beside my father where she would have sat for the ceremony.I know of one man whose mother passed away less than a year before his wedding, and he placed a rose on the chair where his mother would have sat during the ceremony when he went up with the preacher. That would probably be the best thing to do.Whatever you chose, I hope it works out.

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• ck9586

  

  October 2009

  My DD and FI are putting white roses on the altar with a notation in the program saying "these roses are in memory of those who are no longer with us...." and then they list the names. Could he do something like that?

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• ffmaid

  

  October 2009

  Skip both mother son and father daughte dances as neither his mom or your dad is around based on your posts .

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• dmahaday

  

  October 2009

  I'm so sorry to hear of you and your fiance's loss. My mother passed away several years ago, and what we are going to do is leave the first chair next to the aisle in the front row open, and as I come down the aise, I will take a rose from my bouquet and place it on the seat. Everyone will know the symbolization, so no explanation necessary. You could do the same on groom's side, and either him or you could put the rose down. Hope that helps!

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• Jfever member

  

  October 2009

  My Fiancé's Mother also past away, about a year and half ago. We will be skipping the mother/son dance because everything else was to awkward and uncomfortable for him. We are having a vase with flowers and her photo and another vase flowers with and a photo of my brother along with a poem.

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• pulga131 member

  

  January 2010

  I would sktip it all together  Honestly most weddings I go to don't have a groom/mom dance.  My mother passd away about 10 months before my wedding and I worked things into the ceremony to honour her.  I think there are a lot of things you can do in the ceremony.

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