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Furious.

So we've been planning a really nice Orlando vacation with our two friends, L and D.  We've had reservations since June 2 to be in Orlando from the night of the 21st through the day on the 25th.L just messaged me and said her work told her TODAY that she has a mandatory meeting the first day of our trip (the 22nd), and so she can't go.  She's unsure about making the long drive by herself in the middle of the night afterwards to make it down for the other two days, and then having to drive back by herself as well (her husband is still going to go with us on the night of the 21st).  They've told her that if she tries to fight this and take the vacation, they'll most likely fire her, or make her workplace such an unwelcoming atmosphere that she'll want to quit.Ugh.  SO not cool.  I just feel like punching something.  Obviously BF and I, and D most likely, will still go even if she can't.  But we'll all be pissed the whole time we're there because of the crappy situation.  Especially D.  They never got a honeymoon after they were married because they were short on money.  This was going to be their first vacation together as a married couple.  :(
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Re: Furious.

  • edited December 2011
    God that's a really awful situation, sorry you have to deal with that. I'm assuming that back when she booked it she put in for the vacation time and the mandatory meeting hadn't been scheduled yet? Sounds like the kind of disorganization that runs ramped around my office. :-(
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  • edited December 2011
    Why can't her husband just stay behind with her one day, and then drive back with her? That seems like the best solution here.  I'd be furious with my FI if he left me behind like that. Yeah, it would suck for him that her work is screwing him over too.  But if it were me, and my FI really wanted to go, I'd make that sacrifice so we could ALL enjoy a vacation.
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  • edited December 2011
    That sucks!  Did she already have the time off scheduled? If I were D I wouldn't go.  Talk about a third wheel at that point.
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  • edited December 2011
    Yes, she put it on the calendar and the meeting hadn't been scheduled yet.  She had a baby in July, and when she called work to schedule coming back from maternity leave, they offered her a promotion if she came back earlier than she was supposed to.  She took the promotion, and they scheduled a training meeting even though she already had the vacation on the calendar.I told her that D should just miss the first day too and they could both drive down after her meeting, but she wouldn't hear of it.  He had to fight at his job to get all the vacation days, and he's never been to Disney and she doesn't want him to miss any of it, so she's basically making him do the whole trip even though he's upset about her not going.We don't worry too much about the third wheel thing.  Me, D, and BF were all great friends for about two years before he married his wife and a year before I started dating BF, so we're usually not a third wheel type group.  Neither of the couples involved produce that "we're a couple and you're the odd man out, sorry" vibe.  It's just never happened.But yea, if I was D, I wouldn't want to go without my wife either.  I feel so bad for him.  He's the one that's really stuck in a tough spot right now, and we'll totally understand no matter what he chooses to do.  :(
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  • edited December 2011
    Wow that just sucks all around.  I hope you guys still have a good time.  So many companies can be such diicks about letting people take their earned vacation time.
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  • edited December 2011
    Ah, that really sucks then.  If I were D, I think I'd just put my foot down that I'm not going without L.  But I'm pushy like that. This sucks Acro.. I'm sorry your vacation won't be exactly what you were planning.
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  • NcsuPsychNcsuPsych member
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    edited December 2011
    My work tried to do this to me. . I had a trip that was planned 4 months in advance to go with FI up north to be with his family for a week and meet those future Inlaws that I hadn't met before (his aunts and uncles). My work told me that if I left, certain things would happen (even though I've been at my job for 3 years). . I left for the vacation and shortly after (well, about two months later) quit my job because of the crap they were pulling. It just wasn't worth it, and family always comes first for me. Moral = Im not making as much money now, but Im soooo much happier. I wouldn't suggest your friend take the route I did, but since this would have been the first Vacation for her and her DH I would highly suggest she try and make it down one way or another. Everyone needs a break and a breather. If her job is being that crappy now, Im sure she's been putting up with it for a little while and would most likely really enjoy taking a break. that was all random, sorry. . .  I hope all works out well!!
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  • katanne9katanne9 member
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    edited December 2011
    Her workplace sounds simply lovely.Is there an HR dept? Or can she call in/webcam in to this "mandatory meeting"? It sounds totally ridiculous. I don't think threats are supposed to be a regular part of the biz. world.Maybe after she's calmed down and isn't as pissed, driving down at night won't sound like such a bad idea after all?
  • edited December 2011
    They threatened to fire her if she doesn't come in.  It's a training meeting, and the woman training her is flying in on Wed. the 21st for the training meeting on the 22nd.  She can't do it long distance for whatever reason.She's decided to drive down the Thursday night after the meeting.  It sucks, but at least she'll get a long weekend with her husband and us, if not the full blown vacation she wanted.  She's also looking into asking her company to reimburse her for the tickets and such that she bought for the day she's going to miss due to work, so hopefully that'll pan out.I told her if it was me I'd quietly start looking for a new job.  But then again, with the economy the way it is, I can completely understand why she's not keen on doing that.  She and D have two infants to care for, and they just signed a contract on a house, so they need all the jobs they can get.
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  • edited December 2011
    What I'm confused with, is why her husband is not staying behind that one night and coming down with her? If it's one less day for them is one thing, but I find it rude on his part to still just leave her behind and go and let her drive on her own.
  • edited December 2011
    I thought I said this already, but maybe not.He wants to stay with her and come down later with her.  She doesn't want him to miss anything as it's his first trip to Disney, so she's basically forcing him to go early.  He could put his foot down, but then they'd just fight about it the whole trip, and neither of them want that.
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  • edited December 2011
    apparently geldings has reading comprehension issues as well...
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  • edited December 2011
    Eh, it wasn't in the OP.  I'm willing to give her the benefit of the doubt that she responded without reading all the other responses.  Lots of people do it.
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  • edited December 2011
    Wow, stories like this make me happy I have a union. I'm confused about this company. They liked her enough to give her a promotion but they will fire her or treat her like crap if she takes her vacation that she put in for before the training was set? What a crappy working environment. I hope everything works out and you have a great time!
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  • edited December 2011
    Woops, sorry guys. I normally read all the posts before replying. I'm at work, it's busy and I didn't read before posting, my fault. I still think the husband is a hoser for leaving his wife behind and have her drive all the way down on her own. I wouldn't enjoy the beginning of the my trip if I knew I was doing this to my other half.
  • edited December 2011
    I'm done trying to explain to you why D is not a hoser.If you do not comprehend that 1) he doesn't want to go without her and 2) she's forcing him to because she doesn't want him to miss anything, and 3) so he's going with us so she'll be at least somewhat happier, and 4) not because he's selfish and gets some thrill out of going whether she can or notafter I've said it three times now, I'm afraid I can't defend your lack of reading comprehension skills anymore.  I've run out of excuses.
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  • edited December 2011
    The problem is, geldings, that you consider your bf to be your other half, therefore you are incomplete without him. Those of us who see ourselves as two different people who together make a perfect pair, can do things separately without being pissed off...
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  • edited December 2011
    Those of us who see ourselves as two different people who together make a perfect pair, can do things separately without being pissed off... Truth. You speak it.If I were in this situation, I would certainly have a BETTER time if FI were able to go with me, but I'd also want him to go if I were the one being held up. I don't think D is a hoser.... whatever a hoser is. I think that he and his wife are trying to find the solution that creates the greatest good for both of them, instead of making them both resent the situation.
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  • edited December 2011
    Jeana, if I understand it right, hoser is basically the Canadian equivalent of loser or dork, etc. I watched a lot of Strange Brew and dated a Canadian for about a year, and that's what I picked up. Those of you from Canada please feel free to correct me if I'm mistaken.
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  • EDK2010EDK2010 member
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    edited December 2011
    Acro, not going to correct just want to add:I am American, but have lived in Canada for over 5 years and am marrying a Canadian. Never heard of a hoser before, that's definitely a new one!
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  • edited December 2011
    Are you serious? Hoser is a Canadian term! As for my second post, I didn't ask you to "re-explain things for the 3rd time". I simply posted my opinion. My reading comprehension is wonderful thank you, but I'll remember your kind comments next time you seek emergency medical care and you end up in my hands.Hope you guys figured your stuff out.
  • edited December 2011
    I'm really not a b!tch, I promise.  I am just confused as to why you are the only person in this entire thread that continues to think he is a d-bag for doing what his wife has asked him repeatedly to do.Please explain why doing something that your SO wants you to makes you a bad person?  If BF asked me to do something that I knew would make him happier and not really hurt him in anyway, and wouldn't hurt me in anyway, I'd try and do it no matter what, even if the situation was less than ideal.  Wouldn't you?
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  • edited December 2011
    EDK~ Maybe it's not so big in Nova Scotia?  The guy I dated was from Toronto, and I have no idea where Strange Brew is set, but if you rent the movie, it's pretty hilarious, and they use the word hoser about every 5 sentences.
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  • edited December 2011
    That sucks for your friend. I would have them reimburse my tickets for sure. Okay, so they're gonna make it "unpleasant" if she goes? I think she should play their game and make it "unpleasant" for them too. They knew about this requested time off. I hope she does decide to drive down and enjoy herself. She can use a couple of fun days after something frustrating like that.I know that it's hard to find and keep a job these days. I've been laid off before. But it's really crappy that your life is in the hands of people who expect you to eat, breathe and sleep WORK. Sometimes it's not worth it. I hope she goes and the four of you have a great few days.
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  • EDK2010EDK2010 member
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    edited December 2011
    I live in the same province as geldings now (Alberta), FI is from Toronto and I travel all over Canada for work.  Never heard it, but will definitely listen for it now! haha
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  • edited December 2011
    Sassy~  She's going to drive down by herself so she can at least enjoy the couple of days, and we're trying to get our tickets switched around so that the stuff she really wants to do will be moved to a day she's going to be there.  It's all hectic at this point, but hopefully it'll work out alright.EDK~  Maybe I just hung out with crazy people.  Wouldn't be the first time.  :)
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  • EDK2010EDK2010 member
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    edited December 2011
    Acro- I did some investigating. It is pronounced ho-zer. My co-worker sent me this from Urban Dictionary:   "Canadian term popularized by the McKenzie brothers referring to someone clumsy or stupid who drinks beer excessivly". Apparently it is from the 80s and no one uses it anymore!By the way, they are now adding this to the list of things that I don't know, I shouldn't have asked :)! I get made fun of alot for my "Boston accent".
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  • edited December 2011
    My reading comprehension is wonderful thank you, but I'll remember your kind comments next time you seek emergency medical care and you end up in my hands.Woah, thinly veiled threats FTW!a) Acro isn't even in Canada.b) That's a horrible, terrible, immature, and WRONG thing to say, even jokingly.
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  • edited December 2011
    Haha, EDK the Mackenzie brothers are the ones from the Strange Brew movie!  I didn't realize it was actually from the 80s though; I thought it was just a spoof!  Wonderful!Jeana, I must be sending you messages through my tinfoil hat.  ;)
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  • edited December 2011
    Please explain why doing something that your SO wants you to makes you a bad person? If BF asked me to do something that I knew would make him happier and not really hurt him in anyway, and wouldn't hurt me in anyway, I'd try and do it no matter what, even if the situation was less than ideal. Wouldn't you?For sure, I agree with that. I would do anything for my bf. What I found sad about the situation was based on what you posted. In no way is what they decided wrong, this is simply my opinion. I think he is a complete  loser for leaving her behind. It's supposed to be their first trip together. Even a simple drive with company, someone to have conversation with. Instead you leave her by herself, while you go have fun? Of course to each our own, but I still stand with what I posted earlier. I think the guy is a prick if he goes ahead without her and leaves her by herself.
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