Speaking of registries...

andyandhillary · October 2009

...Do you usually buy from a registry, give cash, or buy something random?If there is selection on a registry then I get them something from that. If the couple put 5 things on there, I give them cash because that's the message I am receiving. Only once did I get something random and that's because I was FIs date and he had no info on the registry and the wedding was quickly coming up. I think it's always more "polite" do to cash or a gift from the registry because otherwise you are assuming a lot i.e., their tastes, their needs, etc. I would hate to get someone an object they hate or will never use but feel too guilty to get rid of. Thoughts?

wed0608 · October 2009

I like to get a registry item or give a gift card to one of the stores where the couple is registered.

laurenclaire1386 · October 2009

If there's a registry, I buy from it. It's there for a reason, right? Then, I've only bought like one wedding gift as an adult.

ggmae · October 2009

I haven't gone to many weddings, but my friend is getting married at the end of the month and we are getting him a small gift from his registry and then giving him cash.I would feel comfortable getting a couple a gift that was not cash or from their registry only if I knew them very well and knew their tastes, likes and dislikes.

ffmaid · October 2009

I give a gift from the regisitry with the exception of imidieate family or if I am MOH in which cases I buy specific to their tastes and more special items and more costly too then average registry item. Or if no registry I buy something that I think is their taste.

lpstl · October 2009

I usually buy off the registry unless I'm procrastinating, then I'll run to walgreens for a card and an ATM for cash on the way to the wedding.I never, ever give anything besides cash or a registry item, unless it's a close friend or relative and I decided to splurge big time on something I know they really want.

bbyckes · October 2009

I'm more apt to purchase a gift from their registry. In the past, I was really unaware of the etiquette and would buy something I thought they would like. Then it dawned on me, duh, they registered for what they would like. Strictly registry now, but if not, then cash or gift card for where they have registered. That being said, I'm not looking forward to all the randomness that will inevitably end up as wedding gifts for us, but I will appreciate the thought.

BecW2be · October 2009

Always cash. I only did a registry b/c my ILs asked us to, so it contains things that would be nice to have, but that I really don't need. It makes me happy that I've given cash to couples who may be in the same boat.

LarissaAnn · October 2009

Shower = registry. Wedding = cash. It's a northeast thing, from what I can tell.

anna.oskar · October 2009

Registry is 100% preferred by me. I'm just not a cash giver. If there was no registry (which I have never encountered) then I would give a gift card to a store with universal appeal like BB&B.

andyandhillary · October 2009

Larissa, my family does that too. It could be a cultural thing. My family (Italian/Croatian) do the same but then FI's Dutch family does gifts and only gifts. The only non-registry/cash gift I am looking forward to is that my brother is paying for Andy and I's Disney World tickets. Yaaaay Justin!

tenofcups4me · October 2009

Engagement and shower: registry Wedding: cash It's more the norm in DH's crowd, though, to give a gift for a wedding so we get something from the registry for his friends and family.

sarah0725 · October 2009

I've never given cash as a gift to anyone. I feel kind of weird about it, especially because so far the only weddings I've been to as an independent gift-giving adults were those of close friends, and my brother's wedding. For some reason I feel weird about giving cash to peers.Generally I buy from the registry, unless I know the person really well, or I combine a registry item with a few other things. I only ever gave a non-registry gift once, and that was a Le Creuset for my brother, so I think that was a good gift.

LarissaAnn · October 2009

OT: Anna - your cat looks like a smaller version of MY cat! [img]http://tinyurl.com/yhvl34b[/img]

casso004 · October 2009

I usually buy a registry item if there is something that fits my price point (we often buy presents at the last minute) if not, we give cash or a gift card. Random presents are the worst. I hate it when people assume that their taste is better than what the bride and groom picked out. Like a birdhouse mailbox, for example.

MsGamblingGirl · October 2009

We only got gifts off our registry and we only give gifts off of people's registries. Maybe it's a social circle/cultural thing but cash isn't the norm for us.

NotNumbers · October 2009

I wouldn't feel comfortable giving cash. I usually buy off the registry. Sometimes I'll buy something non-registry, but only if I know the couple will like and use it (ie not a terrarium or heinously ugly homewares).

anna.oskar · October 2009

Anyone without a registry will get the most amazing, romantic, birdhouse mailbox.

TnJBonnell · October 2009

Get the gift from the registry. Thats why its there, they want that particular item. You dont have to worry whether they like it or not. You know they do!Or get them a gift card from that store they liked and choose items from.Or you can do cash. Cash is always a great thing too!

carrieoz_76 · October 2009

I'm actually pretty opinionated when it comes to wedding gift-giving. I don't give cash. And while I accept the practical purpose of registries, they feel really impersonal and when buying for close friends, I intensely dislike them. I like to be thoughtful with my gift-giving, and getting a newly married couple a towel or fork or whatever doesn't feel special or unique.Like I said, though, I accept the practical purpose of registries, so my compromise is that if I go to a shower, I get something for the bride that is special and unique and weddingy but not on her registry. Then I get a totally convential wedding present that's on the registry for the wedding. If no shower, I stick with the registry b/c that means I probably don't know them well enough to go solo.I recently got a gift for a couple that didn't register. I felt like getting them something completely ridiculous just for spite (and maybe adding on a tag that said "That's what you get!"). I didn't - they got a towel set w/ gift receipt - but I wanted to.

sucrets4 · October 2009

In my area (NY) it's a gift for the shower and cash for the wedding. But I usually buy off the registry for the shower.

wadingmoose · October 2009

I'm lazy. It's easier to write a check than shop.

stina93446 · October 2009

I buy from the registry. I spent hours with those darned guns in the stores picking stuff out, and I wanted all that stuff.

ring_pop · October 2009

We usually give cash or a gift card for somewhere useful, except that for my MOH's wedding, we got them the sheet set that they registered for because she told us that that was the one thing she really wanted.But I do have to say that our favourite gifts were all off-registry gifts. It really touched us that people put so much thought into selecting their gifts and and hit the nail right on the head even though we didn't give them "instructions".

ashmy211 · October 2009

Shower = registry. Wedding = cash. It's a northeast thing, from what I can tell.Same here.

maggiewvu · October 2009

Yep I'm in PA shower - registry wedding - gift

ootmother2 · October 2009

Shower: registryWedding: cashThe only exceptions are very close friends and family members. Then I usually wait until after the wedding and ask if there was something they really wanted and didn't get.My niece got 13 waterford bowls/vases and not one piece of their stemware. She was able to work out a swap with the Waterford in NYC to exchange up to 12 of them. (one was a reject from TJMaxx) She told me they had all these dishes and nothing to cook with so I bought her the AllClad she had registered for and not received. That's a big gift but she is my niece.

SpceCadet · October 2009

I don't like giving cash, so I always choose off of a registry. The only off-registry gifts I give are for people moving out of town shortly after their wedding. My sister moved from So Cal to Detroit three days after returning from her honeymoon. I asked a friend who lived in Detroit for years what her favorite restaurant was and bought a sizable gift card to that location. My sister LOVED having a little guidance for a night out in a new area. She saved it for the night when they had unpacked their last box and used it as a reward.

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