+1 Date

dicer2 · November 2009

I was reading through yesterday's thread about people asking if they can bring a date. Since planning my own wedding, I totally understand with costs and space why this needs to happen. However, when I was in my later twenties (before I met DH) I was totally offended when I couldn't bring a date to my cousin's wedding. High school age cousins were able to bring their teeny-bopper boyfriends and girlfriends because they were "in a relationship" but I couldn't. I felt like everyone was staring at me because I was too pathetic to find a date.So I guess I can see it from both sides.

kwynn · November 2009

Oh my, I didn't give teenagers dates. Even if they were dating someone....What a waste of good money!I didn't do plus ones, admittedly, for anyone who wasn't dating for awhile except for the bridal party. It was going to add a lot to my guest list and I had 100% acceptance for weeks. But, after I had some declines, I ended up calling some people and asking if they wanted to bring someone (still over a month before the wedding). I felt that was a good compromise. I just told them to call me back with the name of the person when they had a chance.In the end, everyone who wanted to was able to bring someone. Some of my friends still didn't want to because they weren't dating anyone, or they had to travel and didn't want to bring a date when traveling, etc.

marburs · November 2009

Can you tell me if this is ok? All relatives that have graduated college get a plus one (if you are in high school- you dont, no matter how much underage sex you've had). But no friends get plus ones unless you've been dateing your sig other for a while and we've met them. Does that sound fair? Its about half and half between single friends and non-single friends

slm13 · November 2009

I did get ticked off once by a friend from college who didn't invite me with a plus one. I was living with now-DH for 2 years at this point and had to travel across 3 states for the wedding. They said they were limiting it to engaged or married only. I sent them a gift in the mail. So, they got a gift AND didn't have to pay for my food- I didn't have to pay for a hotel room. Win-win for everyone. I admit we did everyone with a plus one, but only because we knew we were going to have a ton of declines.

Er&JerLem · November 2009

I'd never do +1 for HS age. Like kwynn said - waste of money.Sara - I don't think it's bad - but I'd just do +1 or not across the board (not including HS age.)When we decided not to do +1's, we knew that all of our friends knew each other, relatives knew each other - so there wouldn't be anyone one person coming, without a date, who wouldn't have more than enough people to talk to and hang out with. And we had enough singles that people wouldn't feel like they were in a 'third wheel' situation.

dicer2 · November 2009

I think that sounds fair! I went to several friend's weddings without being able to bring a date and I felt perfectly comfortable. Maybe it's just my relative's looks of pity that I hated.

kbielak17 · November 2009

We did a plus 1 for all guests college age or older. We knew a lot of people we're going to make the wedding so it wasn't an issue for us. But, I also remember when I was single how much I hated not being invited to bring a date - even if I wasn't going to - just out of principle. I understand it's usually for money reasons but my friend could bring her douche-bag BF everyone hated but I couldn't bring someone?

skybluejen · November 2009

I let everyone college age or older bring a +1. It ended up that only people who were engaged or seriously dating someone brought their S/O. Not a single friend or family member brought a random date, and we had 250 guests. It worked out nice and everyone was happy. I'd never expect a friend or cousin to come without their serious boyfriend/girlfriend.

LaFemmeRousse · November 2009

I was once invited to a good friend's wedding without a plus one. I had been dating my now-FI for YEARS at that point and she had hung out with him many times, but they gave the same reasoning as did S's friends- engaged or married only. Well, we're engaged now, and truthfully I'm still a little resentful about it.We're inviting all our friends and any college-age relatives with a plus one (and for the relatives it's like... three people). We won't be having any younger kids, but if we were, they would not be getting dates.

Point202 · November 2009

From my point of view, the reception is a party - the goal of which should be for our guests to have fun. For that reason, we are going to do plus one for just about everyone. I feel like attending a party is more fun if you can bring someone to enjoy it with.

KRMac · November 2009

So many of my cousins/kids of the good friends of our family got married when I was in college. And I was NEVER invited with a date, even when I was dating DH. It would annoy me to no end...especially because I had to freaking invite all of them with their SOs to my wedding! I invited just graduated from HS cousins and college aged (or older) cousins with dates. Most decided not to bring them, actually. I think we invited all friends with dates too...a few brought random +1s, but most either brought a friend that we also knew from college or were in a serious relationship or came alone. Engaged or married only would not have worked for us because we were really the first in our larger group to get married....only a handful were even engaged at that point. But we also had a large wedding!

+1 Date

Re: +1 Date

Choose Another Board

Search Boards