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lurker confessions

audmaataudmaat member
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in Snarky Brides
1. I lurk.  It's creepy.  It get's creepier - I kind of have a crush on noisypenguin's husband.  Hey, even I am slightly skeeved.2. My mom had a lung transplant 3 years ago and her health is declining rapidly.  It is quickly becoming more than I can handle. 

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Today Instead of Working
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Re: lurker confessions

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    aligrrl80aligrrl80 member
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    1. everyone loves dr. pants. 2. I'm really sorry, that has to be tough. 3. tell us more about you and/or us.
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    TSDTSD member
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    Sorry about your mom. That is awful. I second telling us more about us. I'm still here, on lockdown & need something to read besides Parents magazine.
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    wingedbridewingedbride
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    Sorry about your mom. i cannot imagine how difficult that must be.Can I call you automat?
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    aligrrl80aligrrl80 member
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    gone already? what a tease.
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    TSDTSD member
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    Damn. I thought it would at least spawn some more confessions from other lurkers if this one was going to post and run.
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    audmaataudmaat member
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    automat, autobot - I welcome nicknames.  In my head I see Christin and Cali as those old guys in the balcony from the muppets.  But cuter.I live in Texas.  I am engaged.  Tonight my fiance is working late and I'm home alone - and my thoughts keep wandering back to my mom.  And I keep thinking that I can handle it.  But I can't.  It's like I'm 7 and I just slammed my hand in the car door.  It's all I can think about.So, please, I would love it if you took my mind off it. 

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    missz82missz82 member
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    I'm sorry about your mom.1. I'm also a lurker. I felt like following suit. 2. I posted a long time ago on NEY. Like in 2005 when Calinsbride and other actual NEY's posted. 3. I want to jump back in at times but I've lurked off and on and feel mostly lost.
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    wingedbridewingedbride
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    Where in TX are you?I like the christin and cali comparison. We need someone to photoshop that.
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    audmaataudmaat member
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    Also - I ate a donut for dinner.

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    audmaataudmaat member
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    Currently in Austin.

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    aligrrl80aligrrl80 member
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    if my brain wasn't still recovering from being soaked in rum last night, i'd take on that photoshop challenge. but i'll sit back and wait for buddha.
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    TSDTSD member
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    I've always wanted to go to Austin. I hear it's a fun place. I've been all over the country but not there. I like Texas but I only get to go to Dallas.
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    wendyldwendyld member
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    On what occassion do you visit Dallas TSD? Rumor has it there is going to be a GTG there on Feb 6th. There will be cupcakes involved.
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    audmaataudmaat member
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    I love Austin.  I have lived in San Antonio, San Marcos and Denton.  Austin is by far my favorite.  It has sparked my irreversible love affair with food.  Plus, drinking at all hours of the day is much more acceptable here.  Check plus.

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    wingedbridewingedbride
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    I love Austin too. One of my favorite cities. I would move there in a heartbeat.
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    wingedbridewingedbride
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    and i cannot do just a sweet item for any meal. I love donuts, don't get me wrong, but I cannot do only a donut. I would need something non-carb.
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    TSDTSD member
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    Wendy- up until this summer we had a permanent showroom there so I was there every January and June for a tradeshow. We also have close friends who moved there from NJ (He was from here, she's from there and was living in NYC). I'd love to go to a gtg out of town, esp if there are cupcakes involved, but without reliable babysitting, I just don't see it happening. It's kind of NYC or bust right now. I brought a baby, in a stroller, to the bar in the Four Seasons- that's as good as it gets.
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    audmaataudmaat member
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    hey HEY I could still use some distraction.Additional confessions:1. I work with kids but don't really want any.  Well.  That is kind of a lie.  I have a reproductive disorder that may not allow me to have children.  The last time I thought about it I didn't want kids.  But I don't think I've really allowed myself to re-evaluate it since learning this about myself.2.  Wow - I am doing a good job of making myself sound kind of smart.  I think so, at least.  3.  I don't want to say it (because it reeks of selfishness) and I have never said it out loud.  But I wonder if my mom will be able to come to my wedding.  Or if it will still happen.  It's 2 1/2 months away.  It even feels horrible to type. 

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    wingedbridewingedbride
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    okay...? did you feel we were all leaving you?
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    audmaataudmaat member
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    Gosh, I am melodramatic.  But I feel better getting it out.I can't usually do just sweets for dinner either.  I bought stuff to make for dinner.  And even moved stuff around so it looked like I made dinner.  But then I just ate the donut.  And now I'm drinking beer.  I feel sorry for my stomach.

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    wendyldwendyld member
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    It's not selfish to want the people you love the most to share important milestones in your life with you. That's normal. Selfish would be if you resented her for not being able to make it if that's completely outside of her control.
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    TSDTSD member
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    I couldn't eat a doughnut for dinner either. My mom drummed it in my head that you have to have a "real dinner", so if I don't, I get really b*tchy. It can be frozen crap from Jenny Craig, but it's "dinner". Automat- it's not selfish to think that. It's just life. You feel how you feel.
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    SarahBethBRSarahBethBR member
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    Every item I made for dinner tonight involved beer.  The beer cabbage was not a success. Lurker, you're not selfish.  I'm sure your mom wants nothing more than to see you get married too.

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    The nerve!
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    modb1rdmodb1rd member
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    i am just starting to think about dinner. I am leaning towards a grilled cheese sandwhich
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    If I were a man (or fitty) I'd totally call my penis THE WIZARD - HappyTummy
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    TSDTSD member
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    I've still never drank a beer in my life. I confess that we still have beer in our extra fridge from 2006 from a party we threw. We always overbuy. Since we don't drink it, we just let people drink it when they come over. I guess it's still good because no one's ever said anything. Or they just don't want to insult us.
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    modb1rdmodb1rd member
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    oops hit post too soon. Also I am sorry about your mom and I don't think you should feel bad about wondering about your wedding. Sometimes thoughts like that are even a distraction of sorts. I felt petty about some thoughts I had like that but realized it was just me distracting myself from how serious things were.
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    Book Review Blog

    If I were a man (or fitty) I'd totally call my penis THE WIZARD - HappyTummy
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    Giggity19Giggity19 member
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    1.  That's tough audmaat.  Hang in there. 2.  Sometimes I do a drive-by lurk just to see if Fenton or Christen (or Audrey) post anything about STL.  Moved 2 years ago & miss it. 
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    wingedbridewingedbride
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    I think your feelings are natural. Just not your dinner choise.
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    missz82missz82 member
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    It's not selfish to want your mom at your wedding. Since I've been engaged, a lot of my older family members (gm, gp, uncle) have passed away. I feel sad sometimes that they won't be able to attend my wedding.
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    Irishgrl417Irishgrl417
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    I agree with Winged on both counts. Your feelings are natural but breakfast is the only meal that can consist of a donut. Why does "donut" get underlined in red but not "donuts"?
    I'm pretty sure it's pronounced your mom's a moron and if you didn't have your name legally changed by the age of 22, so are you. Unless you're from another continent. -Groomz
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