Invite wording proofing

Re: Invite wording proofing

• ktelizabeth86

  

  June 2012

  Option 2:

  Please share in our Special Day as

  Bride Name

  •  
    and

  Groom Name

   

  Celebrate love of family and join hands in marriage

  Saturday the 27^th of October 2012

  At 4 p.m.

  Ceremony and Reception at the Wedding Location
      Addy

  •  
        Baltimore, Maryland ZIP

  Reception to follow immediately after the ceremony in Orientation Room.

  RSVP Card enclosed.
  
  
  I prefer option #2 but I think the lines that I bolded and underlined above sound a little strange. I would completely take out the first one "Ceremony and Reception at the Wedding Location". I would also completely take out "RSVP Card enclosed". The other one I would change to "Reception to follow" or if you really have to specify "Reception to follow in the Orientation Room".
  
  Just my 2 cents lol. 

  172 Invited.
  130 Accepted.
  42 Declined.
  0 Can't find the mailbox.

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• mrshall1027

  

  June 2012 edited June 2012

  I'm not a big fan of "Celebrate love of family".  I had something similar and someone pointed out that it sounded like a hippie love fest and ever since then, it hasn't sat right with me.

  
  

  Anyway, I prefer the first one and I would write it out like:

  
  

  Please join us

  For the marriage of

  Bride Name

  and

  Groom Name

  Saturday, October 27^th, 2012

  4 pm in the afternoon

  Wedding Location

  Addy

  Baltimore, MD

  Reception to follow

   

  I took out what PP suggested with the reception room and the rsvp card.  I also removed the zip code in the address.  I added "in the afternoon" after the time just for visual balance, but you can leave it out if you don't want it.

  
  

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• pengy16 member

  

  June 2012

  "Celebrate love of family": I wanted something that says our families are combining. Is there a better way to word that?
  
  It doesnt need to specify the Room, it was in a couple of examples I looking at so I wasnt sure if I could just say reception to follow since the ceremony and reception are in the same location, ceremony will be outside, reception inside the venue.
  The designer of my invites generally puts the RSVP enclosed on all her examples so thats why I added it.

  

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• brainybrunette member

  

  June 2012

  I agree with ystaalenburg.  Except that I would word the time as 4 o'clock in the afternoon.  4 pm in the aftenoon is redundant.  

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• mrshall1027

  

  June 2012

  Oh yeah, 4 o'clock in the afternoon is better.  I missed that.

  
  

  You can say something like:

  
  

  Together with their families

  Brides Name

  and 

  Grooms Name

  request the pleasure of your company

  as the join their hands in marriage.

  
  

  or

  
  

  request the pleasure of your company

  at the celebration of their wedding

  
  

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• TheSlowskys member

  

  June 2012

  I don't care for the wording of #2, but I would make a couple tweaks to #1 just using more traditional wording (I'd want the names before the date).  Also, make sure to spell out MD.
  
  I would put "reception immediately following ceremony" or "Reception to follow" I think that you don't need to say the room necessarily (I've seen this done for ballrooms, but Orientation Room doesn't have the same ring).
  
  Also, I dont think you need to put that the RSVP is enclosed.  They can figure that out.

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