Is it tacky to not give out favors?


Re: Is it tacky to not give out favors?

  • edited December 2011
    Actually I do think cheap photo frames and a plastic cup of mints is tacky. Guests will just throw that out.

    Rather than just assuming all favors are junk, and your money would better be spent on a charity, why don't you take the time to think of something guests will really appreciate. Try to make it personal. A favour is about showing your guests how much you appreciate them being a part of your life and your marriage. If you don't have the $$ for a favor, don't do one. Take the time instead to write a personal note to each guest.

    Can someone please explain how a donation to a charity makes guests feel appreciated?
  • teri83686teri83686 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't believe it is tacky not to give out favors.
    Your guests are at your wedding to celebrate the beginning of your marriage.  The reality is most favors, unless edible are thrown away withing a year.  The exception being if the "favor" is an expensive item which might quallfy it as a thank you gift ,not a "thank-you" favor. 
    Your active interaction with every guest during your reception, other than the quick "thank you for attending" while they are in the receiving line is much more of a "favor" than a trinket to take home. 

  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_favors_tacky-not-give-out-favors?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:27Discussion:1ff94405-75bc-4fe8-8caa-2d51e1949b2aPost:7921d6d8-6c06-42a3-bb06-44638d7b0e06">Re: Is it tacky to not give out favors?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I've been pondering this question as well...and what I've decided is that I don't remember the favors at the last wedding I went to, but I do remember the wonderful food and generosity of an open wine bar. So, with that being said, I believe we will be putting our money into the items that people will enjoy and maybe just having some fall-colored candy on the tables (wedding in Oct.). Hope this is helpful!
    Posted by lastraub[/QUOTE]

    My FI and I have been on the fence with this as well and I am glad to know I am not in the minority!

    I like the idea of a dessert-candy-cookie bar- hey people love weddings because they are celebrating two awesome people starting their lives together by having great food, an open bar and a party! So why not give them a little extra instead of something they always forget to take home.
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  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I am the person who wrote part of the sticky at the top of the page, re:  donation favors.

    I think donations are wonderful.  I make them often.  I believe in donating to charities that are meaningful and important to ME and MY family.  But I don't believe that they are in any way, shape, or form a "favor" to your guests.

    They are a favor to the charity, and to those who benefit from the charity.  But can anyone explain to me how giving money to someone else is a favor for me? 

    Think about the word favor:  "I'm going to do you a favor and shovel your driveway this winter."  Wonderful!!  Now what if someone said "I'm going to do you a favor and shovel my invalid cousin's driveway this winter."  See what I mean?  It's a favor:  for the invalid cousin.  But it's not anything for me.

    I DON'T need a favor.  I don't really WANT a favor at a wedding.  After all, you've presumably given me dinner, drinks, and good entertainment already.  A tulle pouch filled with Hershey's kisses isn't going to make or break your wedding.  But at least they're for me.

    Make your donation.  But why the need to announce it to your guests?  That's where it becomes wrong.  Because your guests don't need to know that you made a donation.  As the old Nike ad said:  "Just do it".  I'll add to the slogan:  "Just don't announce it."
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • edited December 2011
    At our engagement party we received a card from a family friend who noted inside that they had made a donation to a charity in lieu of a gift (...we weren't expecting gifts, just a party with the family!)  at any rate, i didn't have any negative feelings towards this, there was no side-eyeing on my part...
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