Community› Local Wedding Boards› Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth
Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth
New Discussion

Should i invite....?

cfibelkorncfibelkorn member
1000 Comments
in Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth
Let me start off by saying I am SOOOOO not a mean person if it comes across that way haha

I have an aunt and her children that i am not really close to. I see them on occassion at family get togethers and she acts as though we are best buddies. She is the family drama queen, she drinks way to much and is very blunt. It is pretty embarrassing.

I saw her this last weekend and her son literally said "So I guess the next time I will see you is your wedding" which is in November!!!!!!! Is it just me? I feel like I am crazy for thinking that if I can go that long without talking to you why should you be invited!

Plus it will be the first time my family meets his and I don't want her embarrassing me, the wedding will have about 40-50 guests


What should I do?
FOR SALE Image and video hosting by TinyPic
Report Reply to Post

Re: Should i invite....?

  • Tiffany618Tiffany618
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011

    As long as your Mom and/or Dad are okay with it then I say don't invite.   Especially since your doing a more intimate wedding then I think it is fine if every single aunt, uncle, and cousin is not invited.. particularly if your not close with them.

    Report Reply
  • rcpm44rcpm44 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'd have to agree with pp. Nothing else to contribute, just agree. :)
    image~Bio and for sale~
    Report Reply
  • ewinkler1977ewinkler1977
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I understand you don't want her to make a scene but she is her aunt.  She is your dad/mom's sister.  How awkard would that be and in the long run might cause family tension.  I honestly don't think its worth that.  Just invite her and tell the bartendar to cut her off after just a few drinks.
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Photo by K & S Photography

    Report Reply
  • amberproamberpro member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Will it be a "shun"?  What I mean is, will every other family member (on that level) be invited?  If they are, then you should invite her and assign a family member to keep an eye on her so as not to ruin your wedding.  It would probably do more harm than good in the long run if every other aunt was invited except her.  If there are other aunts and uncles not invited, then you can get away with it.

    We all have family members that we don't get along with.  I'm sure FI's family won't blame you for your family's issues. 
    photo images_zps41edd072.jpg

    Carter born 5/28/11
    BFP 9/27/12 EDD 6/11/13, MC 9wks, no HB

    Report Reply
  • Mariah09202008Mariah09202008
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I think that family is family is family.  Seriously.  My mom, who has drama coming out the butt when it comes to her family, would still want me to invite her sister to our wedding, even we only see them once a year...which is how it is on my mom's side of the family.  Since they live in Arkansas I only see them once a year if that much, but I'd feel extremely guilty and my mom would NOT  be happy with me if I decided that just because her sister causes a little drama or stir not to invite her. And my family in Arkansas are loud and very country but God bless 'em...I love them and accept them for who they are and just try to enjoy being around them when I get the chance.
    Report Reply
  • emimayoremimayor
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Family is family. She deserves the courtesy of an invitation. And she is an aunt, not your aunt twice removed. And you shouldn't worry about what people may or may not do at your wedding. They're there for you, but they're also there to enjoy themselves and see other people. Even thoug you're having a small wedding, you don't have to spend that much time with her.
    Report Reply
  • shortgirltxshortgirltx
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011

    I pretty much believe the all or none rule unless there is some crazy exception.  I don’t think it’s right to pick and choose.  I didn’t invite one aunt because she’s cut everyone out of her life and I haven’t talked to her in 4 or 5 years.  You’re going to have someone do something embarrassing more than likely.  But guess what, their actions will be on them 100%, not you.  Just focus on you and the groom that night.

    Report Reply
  • juliebug1997juliebug1997 member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Ditto, shortgirl.  I didn't invite one of my uncles because he has made rude comments to other family members before--you're dying of cancer...don't you just want it over with?  and I wouldn't want a kid with autism because that just seems like such a waste.  He made the decision a long time ago to cut my dad and other uncle out of his life and to be the kind of person he is.  I didn't want that at my wedding. 
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Possible Infestation
    Report Reply
  • Tiffany618Tiffany618
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I agree that family is family, but that doesn't mean they have to be at your wedding.

    My FI has an Uncle who makes horribly inappropriate comments similar to Juliebugs and makes his own family uncomfortable.  Even FI's Mom (her brother) didn't put him on her list.

    I also have an aunt I have never met (not by my choice) and she is certainly not invited either.
    Report Reply
  • Mariah09202008Mariah09202008
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Well, I think it's one thing not to invite an aunt or uncle you've never met...but to not invite an aunt you see on occassions because she may or may not say something inappropriate or because she may have too much drink (guess what? It happens at weddings and it might not even be the person you think it's going to be) is something else.  I guess I would think it would depend on how my mom/dad may feel if I exclude her/his sister from the wedding.
    Report Reply
  • almoyoalmoyo member
    Seventh Anniversary 500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I would invite her. Your fiance is going to have to deal with her after you're married, and there will be hell to pay the first time the two of you go to a gathering she attends if you don't even extend her an invite.
    Bionic Photobucket
    Report Reply
  • mandasue178mandasue178 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I say invite her. If you don't invite her, you might as well consider that relationship ruined - for good. 
    Becoming My Mother
    Names for our Currently Non-Existent Baby Anniversary
    image
    Dx: PCOS 3/11
    **TTC buddies with Browneyedhunni85**
    Report Reply
  • wagnerj3wagnerj3
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    What do your parents think?  If they don't care, I honestly wouldn't invite her if you really don't want to. I know a lot of people believe that family is family but I think it's about how you treat each other and how you act as people, not just that you were born into the same family. If you don't have a connection or relationship with her and your parents are fine with it, then why invite her?  I know I am in the minority here but I think life is too short and this should be a day of celebration for you and your hubby to be.  However, if it really is just that she is mildly annoying and it will cause a huge fight within the family, then it's probably best to just invite her.  It's hard to know but I would do what you feel is right.  None of us can really know or understand your situation.  good luck. we have had our share of serious family drama in the past and it's no fun. 

    image

    imageWedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards