S/O: Poll: Kids and TTC

akmackay · August 2010

Going off the discussion yesterday on fears, a few of you agreed with my fear of having trouble once it comes time to TTC. Here's a poll... and open for discussion below.

akmackay · August 2010

I think with the more we try not to have kids now (especially with the pill) it is making it harder for people to try to conceive once they are ready. I have no medical backing on this, but I think this is a big reason (plus the older starting age) that people are having more and more issues conceiving now. Perhaps I'm being naiive, but just my prospective.

With that said, since I have been on the pill for so long I am afraid that I will have issues once it comes time. I would think that initially we would do everything we can (minus surrogate) but if we weren't meant to have our own kids, I would absolutely adopt. I would love to adopt regardless actually, but will see what the future brings.

ccerrato15 · August 2010

I've been thinking about this a lot lately too...I'm not quite sure what exactly I would do if I could not bear children, it def is a fear of mine to not have the experience of being able to have children and I agree that you seem to be hearing it more and more and you can't help but possibly contribute it to getting married older, being on the pill forever, etc etc. People I've spoken to say not to worry about it, but I worry about everything so why not this lol.

ffbride_0813 · August 2010

We have talked about it and would absolutly adopt a child. If I am not able to naturally have children then i believe its a sign that I was needed to become a mother another way. I am scared though if we get to the point of trying to adopt that we may have taken way too long and I will be an old mother. Adoption in itself is a long process without the added time of trying and failing to concieve.

viviannac · August 2010

I agree with Allie, if I could not conceive, I would definitely adopt.

Et - I think about that too b/c I know people who have undergone the adoption process and it does take quite a while.

Heather822 · August 2010

I put Special Snowflake, because I honestly just don't know.....
We have talked about doing whatever it takes, but sometimes I wonder if that will change if we actually find ourselves in the position.
I like to think we would do whatever it takes, but money is certainly a huge concern, as well as health risks (hormones cause cancer, ie), and the risk of multiplies, or fear of miscarrying after a miracle conception....
Its overwhelming. I just don't know.

jaimelody · August 2010

I've always wanted to adopt rather than have kids. I've been on the pill for 10+ years so I'm sure it's got to have done something messy with my system. But DH is adamant against it. His mom and uncle were adopted. Not that they had a bad life at all, but he just wants "his own seed" I guess. I'm not sure - completely open because there are A LOT of children who still need love in this world without trying to make your own.

Danes983 · August 2010

It def makes me nervous about ttc bc I have been on the pill since I was 16. I am praying and hoping that i dont have any issues. I would love to adopt 1 baby no matter what. But FI is not really into that. I figure once we are married a year I will go off the pill and see what happens. Then i will decide.

NJgurl19 · August 2010

Girls I love kids and admire people who adopt, but I don't think I can adopt. Does this makes me a terrible person? Fi and I have discussed this,he is all for adoption if it's the only choice but I' am very adamant. I hate that I feel this way.

gibribuz · August 2010

I am a little nervous about TTC but I don't think that I would be devastated if I couldn't. I would be perfectly happy adopting a child. I have always wanted to adopt a child.

peaches85 · August 2010

FI and I have talked about this before and we agreed that we would adopt. I know I'll probably get flamed for this, but we decided that our first choice would be to try and adopt a child from his home country of Ecuador. If we didn't have direct ties to another country (or if the adoption process in Ecuador has too much red tape), then we'd definitely adopt a child from America before going all Angelina Jolie and adopting kids from every country BUT America.

MissButters · August 2010

This is also a fear of mine. I've been on the bpill for about 12 years, and I think I may go off after our honeymoon. Not that we want to get pregnant right away - but I want my body to start adjusting to being off of them so it's ready when we do want to try. We'll try for a couple of years if we have problems, but then will adopt.

felicia220 · August 2010

I have a lot of factors against me, so this is something we have talked about a lot. I have been on BC for 12 years, I smoke (which I am in the process of trying to quit)and I have a pituitary tumor (common and not cancerous) which definitely messes with my system. I don't produce estrogen on my own, so for now I take BC to get it. I would try everything to have my own child but if that didn't work I would adopt, or at least try to, because it is a very long expensive process. But I am going to be as hopeful as possible until the doctors tell me I have run out of options.

Jaytee501 · August 2010

"I love kids and admire people who adopt, but I don't think I can adopt. Does this makes me a terrible person?" NJGurl

My mom was adopted, I would happily adopt...and no, I don't think it makes anyone a terrible person if they don't feel they could!

We're going to TTC naturallybut would likely procees to fertility treatments if necessary.

Again, I would happily adopt but our ages (approaching late 30s) & some other factors would make it difficult, even though we would be open to an older child, any ethnicity, etc. It's still something we would look into & may look into even if we ARE able to have a child who is biologically "our own."

kwilkinson14 · August 2010

I would have no problems adopting any child! I am actually adopted myself along with my older sister. I cannot imagine having any other parents but the ones I have now. I know my FI doesn't have a problem with it either considering his father was adopted as well.

Lola Minnie · August 2010

I agree with you, Allie, about the pill. It makes me nervous I should take myself off sooner than planned just incase since I have also been on it a while.

I would try IVF or adopt.

eleven29 · August 2010

I've also been on the pill for about 9 years already, so I wonder if my system is messed up. FI and I have talked about this topic, as he is an embryologist-in-training at an infertility place. He sees firsthand how IVF is done and I think when it's done right (like it is at his practice) it's definitely a great option (as in not having 20 embryos implanted so you end up like octomom!). With him working there I'd be able to get it done greatly discounted as well, which is good because I know it's very expensive. I have had a few friends who had a lot of trouble TTC and I pray we don't have to go through it, but I know that if I do we have options.

S/O: Poll: Kids and TTC

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