Did you ever think about skipping the whole thing??? (Vent)

HeatherL212 · January 2011

Everyone I come across says why don't you just go to the courthouse and/ or go to Vegas??? It's really getting annoying. I'm the one who really wants the wedding and FI could care less, he wants a truck. The problem is is that we are paying for this ourselves and sometimes think that the money could be spent on other things.Our budget is $14000, which I feel is a pretty low budget, but when family says that they will help out with maybe $1000 you really start to wonder is it all worth it?? I hope this doesn't upset anyone. I am just frustrated with peoples' opinions. Did anyone before booking anything (of course) start to have these feelings or am I just letting people get to me too much?

cmp1986 · January 2011

I'm in the same boat as you. People always ask me and my FI why are you having a wedding. It's what we want!!!! You just have to ignore those other people. In the end it will be so worth it. There's just alot of crap and stress you have to go through in order to get there. I've got most of my vendors and I still feel like just calling everything off (due to stress and money). But I know if I would I'd regret it a lot. Just gotta keep your head up and stop listening to other peoples stupid comments.

Dee729 · January 2011

I went through the SAME THING...I dreamed of having a wedding since I was young...didn't every girl?! haha.

So...when it came time to actually plan a wedding..I was pumped! Garrett was on board...but everyone kept saying...use the money for a house, go to Vegas...

It sucked at times, but if I didn't have a wedding, I would have regretted it big time...and now that I had the wedding of my dreams...I love back at the pictures and can't help but smile....best day of my life.

now with the money we got from the wedding, we are using it for a down payment on a house.... its a win-win.

Stick with it girl....it will be worth it in the end!

waterroxy17 · January 2011

I also went through it.. My FI and I are paying for everything ourselves also. Sometimes i thought it would be easier just to do the Courthouse/Vegas thing. But in the end i knew i would regret it. I wouldn't have the pictures/video i always dreamed of.
There will be ups and downs with it all, i've only been planning for 8 months so far and I'm sure there will be more to come. When it all comes down to it, you just have to make sure you and your FI are happy

herculeschloe · January 2011

It has surprisingly turned out to be an extremely stressful process. I thought it would be so much fun and everyone would help out and be supportive but it has not turned out to be that way! BUT, I am convinced that when the day arrives, all the madness and drama and stress will be worth it. The day is all about the bride and groom...just keep remembering that! It is your day to shine and while planning may suck and seeing the money leave the bank account so quickly is heartbreaking, the day will be yours and you will have the rest of your life to remember it as the start of something beautiful

Hang in there!

lgrn22 · January 2011

I had the complete opposite. I joked saying I would just go and elope and everyone freaked out telling me we had to have a wedding. I want a wedding so it is fine. We started with a 30k budget and quickly realized that it was crazy to spend that much when we are paying for it ourselves. We ended up with a 20k budget which will include everything except the dress bc my mom bought it.
I am however getting opinions on everything which is annoying but exactly like Christina said ignore them and do what you want. Its all about you and FI, so do whaetver you feel is right in your heart.

EvelynandManny · January 2011

Like everyone one on here I said it many times myself...everyone including my parents think that the wedding is a big waste of money (even though we arent even spendng alot) but still they think it would be better off put to a bigger vacation or whatever.. I really did not even want a wedding to be honest but FI said he wanted to share the day with my fam and his so we started to plan and I got really into it..so having any neg feed back makes me want to just throw in the towel..but now i know if i dont do it i will regret it later so we are almost there...people will come around eventually

danzigwedding · January 2011

I wouldn’t worry about it. In the same time frame you posted this vent, you also posted questions on a planner and photographer. So you know you’re going to go through with it. And letting people get to you when you know it’s going to happen is just unneeded stress/pressure on yourself. Focus on what you want and just tell them eloping is not for you, but if they want to, then go right ahead!

lyndopo · January 2011

Same here... everyone kept telling us to put that money down on a house. And for quite a bit of time, we definitely thought about it. Ultimately it really comes down to what YOU want to do!

ARose29.defunct635760306938291358 · January 2011

What day do I not think that... LOL. My current spending budget is double your budget.

Krysta6 · January 2011

Yeah I keep getting told to Elope. WTH! My parents were like why don't you just elope and only invite close family, all I could think was who says I want my family there instead of my friends?? My family makes me crazy! But I want a wedding, the ceremony is really important to me and having everyone together is too. So I just ignore there comments about eloping.

Squeaky00 · January 2011

It seems like alot of us are on the same boat. My fiance and I will be paying for our entire wedding. We are both happy about our big day at the end of this year. There are times were I get stressed because everyone has their own opinon on everything. I agree with what everyone has said already. My only this is do what is best for you and your fiance. Remember this is BOTH of your day. So enjoy it and do what makes you guys happy

Happy Planning.

sadou02 · January 2011

Ive thought of eloping recently because of the stress the wedding is causing. Luckily friends have continuously reassured me that everything is going to workout. You just need to surround yourself with positive people and as other posters have said ignore the negative talk.

cramo003 · January 2011

I have had the same concerns not because of outside pressure but just my own crazy self. FI and I are pretty much paying for everything ourselves and trying to close on a house in the next month so I defnintely worry that spending all this money on a wedding is not the best idea. But then I tell myself, I am only getting married ONCE and no matter what Vegas could never be nearly as SACRED and MEMORABLE as exchanging vows in front of all our friends and family. It's okay that you are having second thoughts ... we all do. Just make sure you and your FI are on the same page and make decisions based on what YOU want not on what other think/say.

Moonstar713 · January 2011

definitely normal !!! My MIL told us this for a good 2 months, yet she wants to invite 10 of her coworkers, PLUS spouses! A lot of my coworkers would also suggest eloping but I knew that would never be enough. They would tell me to wait til we are both in our careers to have the big party. But it's not the same thing, cause techinically we'd already be married. I am the first of my friends and close family to have the big wedding, so it was that more special, and stressful. And we are also paying for it. We are doing everything on a budget and yet I feel like everything is coming out great, less than 10K for 100. I figured if we moved in together there will always be OTHER expenses, might as well get over it now that we don't have huge obligations like a house or children. We want to live together already so badly. But if this is something you really want and have always wanted, don't listen to them, trust me they come around and even help in their own way. When you start getting the bigger things they will see you are serious. Don't settle. My BIL still asks me why we are spending the money, I tell them that its really not that much and I also tell him, "money has a way of slipping through your fingers, it comes and goes and I always know there is some out there for me to get, but a wedding gives you life long memories and that's priceless"

I am excited and scared for the day, and I know I won't have any regrets. I know FI would be ok with eloping but he knows thats not what I want, so he refused for me to settle for anything else but a real wedding

. But I know he wants it too

PhiSigFly · January 2011

I'll jump on board here... We're having a 2 year engagement so that we can save money for our wedding. I've definitely had times that I think we're crazy (we're paying ourselves) and we should save up for a house. Fortunately, my family and FI's family are VERY supportive.

My step sister got married at City Hall a few months ago and REALLY regrets not having a celebration with people. Guess whose having a fairly large reception in September? My best friend went to Disney, who has packages for very small weddings, and got married with only 20 guests and now SHE really regrets that and always talks about being upset about it, and it was only this past August. So, as terrible as it sounds... Those situations make me feel better about the whole thing!

HeatherL212 · January 2011

I'm so glad I am not the only one!!!! It feels horrible to even think about skipping. Thanks ladies

I feel a lot better now. It just makes me want to cry! What hurts the most is that it's our families (parents) telling us...

Did you ever think about skipping the whole thing??? (Vent)

Re: Did you ever think about skipping the whole thing??? (Vent)

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