This is really complicated so just bear with me. My wedding is still a while away, but I'm still having an issue with trying to figure out if/how to incorporate sisters into the bridal party. I have one sister (Kelsey), younger than me by two years, with whom I have never gotten along, and a sister-in-law (Sara), who is nine years older than me, but we are very close. My fiance has 4 sisters; a twin (Kristen), and the rest are older by seven (Emily), nine (Diane) and eleven (Carrie) years. Carrie is married with three children and the Diane is engaged and will be married before us.
The problem is, ideally I would like to have a small wedding party, and my best friend is my non-negotiable MOH, and I have a male friend who will be on my side, and potentially another close friend as well. That is three already and I would love to keep it to 5 or less on my side, as my fiance has decided on three groomsmen and a BM, but there are six sisters in the picture that I have to contend with (family is very important to my fiance). My fiance is not especially close with Carrie because of the age difference and he and Emily have very different personalities, and Kristen and I have not gotten along very well even before I started dating her brother. Kelsey and I have been at odds since the day she was born, so in my mind that leaves Sara and Diane, however, I am afraid that asking one or two sisters and not the others will lead to hurt feelings and that is something I need to avoid. A friend suggested I ask the unmarried sisters, since bridesmaids are traditionally unmarried anyway, but I know that having both Kristen and Kelsey there would lead to all kinds of drama and stress that I will not be able to handle (Emily is a lovely person, he's just not the favorite sister of the fiance, Diane is).
I don't know the best way to handle this. I'm not a confrontational person, and I'm not sure if it's better to just include Kelsey and Kristen to make everyone happy or leave them out because I'd rather not go on a homicidal rampage in the middle of my reception (I hear it's just impossible to get bloodstains out of silk). Any advice?