How young is too young to be a flower girl?

alecat9 · March 2010

I know, maturity can play a big part but what is the youngest you would consider?
Thanks.

MyNameIsNot · March 2010

4-5. She needs to be able to walk that far in front of a lot of people, most likely by herself.

emilykathleen511 · March 2010

I think 3, but depending on the child maybe 4. My nephew would have been perfect at 3, but I know plenty of children where that would have been a disaster.

stina93446 · March 2010

I think 3 is too young. I was in a wedding where there were 4 fgs. Ages were 2,3,4, and 5. Only the 5 year old made it down the aisle. My niece was our fg and she was 4 and she made it down the aisle. If they can't walk down the aisle themselves, then definitely no, in my opinion.

mbcdefg · March 2010

If they can't engage in a basic conversation with you about the role ("I hold the pillow?" "I need to throw petals?"), then that's what I feel is too young.

quotequeen · March 2010

I think they can be as young as you want, as long as you aren't too concerned about what they do. If you're going to freak out if they don't make it down the aisle or whatever, then 5.

alecat9 · March 2010

@Stina, Coud you explain the walking down the aisle part...do you mean they younger ones got distracted from walking the aisle or the aisle was to physically demandng for them?

alecat9 · March 2010

*the younger ones, not they. sorry

KD+BC · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_young-young-flower-girl?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d69b1b17-f8f9-47c6-9f89-c748b3e50195Post:46024e9e-a754-4c42-8e27-5b0b7d9374e9">Re: How young is too young to be a flower girl?</a>:
[QUOTE]I think they can be as young as you want, as long as you aren't too concerned about what they do. If you're going to freak out if they don't make it down the aisle or whatever, then 5.
Posted by quotequeen[/QUOTE]

I don't completely disagree but remember, a very young child will require someone to take care of them during the ceremony. This could mean that the caretaker takes the child out of the ceremony location completely and misses the ceremony. As long as the caretaker (most likely the parent of the child) doesn't mind this job, great. I personally do not want to put that on anyone so we will not have a FG or RB. The kids we are closest to are too young. If their parents choose to bring them, great, but I want that to be their decision.

stina93446 · March 2010

The 3 year old got scared, the 2 year old followed her, and the 4 year old made it half way down the aisle before seeing her parents and ditching the petals.

I agree with everyone else. If she can't explain what she's doing, then she's too young.

Our rb was 3 and he kept playing "wedding" with his mom and dad, saying that he was the ring bear and he got to hold a pillow and say that "auntie stina was so pretty."

alecat9 · March 2010

K, thanks guys, for all of your very helpful answers.

bablingbrooke · March 2010

Trix has the best test: If they can't explain to you what a wedding is, what their role is, and say yes without help, they're too young. I would say anyone under the age of 4 is probably too young as a general rule.

trix1223 · March 2010

Thanks, brooke. I was just getting ready to type out my standard reply. So instead I get to type to you. That's more fun.

megk8oz · March 2010

I'm with the other ladies: if they can't tell you what a wedding is and what they're supposed to do in their role without an adult helping them explain, it's too young. So usually, 4 is the absolute youngest that I'd say is "ok".

banana468 · March 2010

Yeah, I think being able to carry on a conversation about WHAT they're doing should be required. Some smart 3 year olds can do this but just keep in mind that a tempermental child will not change either.

Stallmanj1 · March 2010

It can be adorable to coax a child down the aisle, and it can be adorable for the flower girl and ring bearer to walk together (if they can manage it). If you are prepared for any result (the child may throw a tantrum, or not walk down the aisle, or draw *way* too much attention to herself etc.), then go for it. Some times those moments that show up on America's home videos can be the best moments (if you don't mind the children "stealing your thunder").

stina93446 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_young-young-flower-girl?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d69b1b17-f8f9-47c6-9f89-c748b3e50195Post:b045092e-2e4a-40b7-b19c-895bb0ffb912">Re: How young is too young to be a flower girl?</a>:
[QUOTE] Some times those moments that show up on America's home videos can be the best moments (if you don't mind the children "stealing your thunder").
Posted by Stallmanj1[/QUOTE]

<div>She's not thor. She has no thunder. No one can steal it.</div>

lalap69 · March 2010

I think 3 is definitely the youngest, but it definitely depends on the child.

quotequeen · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_young-young-flower-girl?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d69b1b17-f8f9-47c6-9f89-c748b3e50195Post:6e1d2921-a366-44e7-8687-8963a2b46be8">Re: How young is too young to be a flower girl?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How young is too young to be a flower girl? : I don't completely disagree but remember, a very young child will require someone to take care of them during the ceremony. This could mean that the caretaker takes the child out of the ceremony location completely and misses the ceremony. As long as the caretaker (most likely the parent of the child) doesn't mind this job, great. I personally do not want to put that on anyone so we will not have a FG or RB. The kids we are closest to are too young. If their parents choose to bring them, great, but I want that to be their decision.
Posted by KD+BC[/QUOTE]

All of the children are invited to my wedding, and I hope they would be there whether they are in the ceremony or not, so the "caretaker" requirements on the parents would be exactly the same. If the parents didn't want to deal with the kids at the wedding, they had the choice to say no to them being in the wedding, just as they have the choice to not bring them.

KD+BC · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_young-young-flower-girl?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d69b1b17-f8f9-47c6-9f89-c748b3e50195Post:8558ef6e-5f6f-4454-9c20-029031a52345">Re: How young is too young to be a flower girl?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How young is too young to be a flower girl? : All of the children are invited to my wedding, and I hope they would be there whether they are in the ceremony or not, so the "caretaker" requirements on the parents would be exactly the same. If the parents didn't want to deal with the kids at the wedding, they had the choice to say no to them being in the wedding, just as they have the choice to not bring them.
Posted by quotequeen[/QUOTE]

I just think it's a lot easier to choose to not bring your child to the ceremony than turn down a request for a flower girl. Also, kids are, indeed, temperamental. You could plan to bring them but they wake up in a horrible mood so you decide to leave them with a sitter. Can't do that if they are the FG or RB.

I'm not bashing your wedding just stating my opinion to the OP.

How young is too young to be a flower girl?

Re: How young is too young to be a flower girl?

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