no ring bearer or flower girl

CynthiaNJohn · April 2010

so my family and my fiance's family really doesn't have any young girls or boys to be our flower girl or ring bearer. Our friends don't even have kids yet - and if they do, they are infants and way to young.

have any of you not had children within your wedding party - did it still look and turn out ok? just curious - thanks!

mbcdefg · April 2010

We didn't have any children in the wedding party, and it looked and turned out just fine. I really don't understand why it wouldn't turn out O.K. if you didn't have children in the wedding.

The rehearsal went by very quickly since we had all adults, the ceremony went off without a hitch, we got nice photos in between the ceremony and reception without having to worry about keeping small kids entertained (plus we were walking around a lot and even had the guys climbing in trees, which would've been impossible with kids), we sat the whole wedding party and their dates at our head table, and we could drink and have fun in the limo without having to watch our language.

Our priest and photographer also said that they were very glad that we weren't involving kids, because it just made THEIR jobs easier.

It would be stupid to kick a random kid to be in your wedding just for the sake of filling a 30-second role. If there aren't any special kids that you cannot picture leaving out of your wedding, then don't worry about it.

aerinpegadrak · April 2010

Why wouldn't it look or turn out okay? Child attendants aren't required, and these days it seems more common to skip them than to have them.

Don't buy into all the trappings that you think a wedding "has" to have. All you must have is two consenting adults and (in most states) an officiant. Everything else is optional.

MyNameIsNot · April 2010

We had no children in our wedding. It was fine.

trix1223 · April 2010

I'm a church organist, and as such see more weddings in a year than many see in their lifetime. And far fewer weddings DON't have FGs and RBs than do.

Will you be any less married if you don't have a little girl and boy toddling down the aisle?

FWIW: My son and DD are both married, and neither one of them had kids in the WP. And their weddings were lovely.

deepcovejackie · April 2010

We're having no kids in the WP by choice. I didn't feel like being the one who has to wheedle and plead with small kids to do something that I'm sure they do not care about. I think it will be just fine.

suz62984 · April 2010

We aren't having children in our wedding which save a lot of drama. My cousin had a flower girl that threw a tantrum right before the ceremony and refused to walk or wear her dress. She ended up just having a ring bearer. This isn't a position that has to be filled. No one will think anything about it at the wedding and everything will look perfect.

skippylouwho · April 2010

I prefer to attend weddings that don't have ring bearers and flower girls. Personally I find them to generally be a nuisance. I love little kids, just not in weddings.

CourtneyBC · April 2010

I've seen waaaay more weddings without kids than with. Definitely do not stress over it!

LarissaAnn · April 2010

No kids in my party and it was perfect.

CynthiaNJohn · April 2010

thanks for the feedback - i'm not really stressing about it or worried about it and not that it wouldn't "turn out ok" (wrong choice of words). Just seeing if it was common.

thanks again.

banana468 · April 2010

We opted not to have them in the wedding as well. It would have been either a TON of kids or no kids. We opted for none.

[Deleted User] · April 2010

It's totally ok not to have a RB or FG. Usually the RB doesn't even have the real rings anyway, the best man does. And for the FG, most churches (if you are getting married in a church) dont allow you to throw petals anymore, so basically is all they do is wear a pretty dress and look cute with the RB walking down the isle.

no ring bearer or flower girl

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