Asking for gifts for a second time. Would you say something?

cac847 · May 2010

I just got this invitation on FB for a friend's cat's birthday party:

Come celebrate R_________'s 1st birthday with us!

For entrance, be sure to bring a present for the birthday kitty!
Some Ideas for gifts:

* A roll of paper towels (he loves to shred them)
* A cardboard box
* Paper bags
* Kitty treats (he loves the Temptations brand, but any will do)
* Canned Cat Food (Friskies is the only brand he eats)
* Cat toys - homemade or store bought (anything bouncy, feathery, or with bells usually gets his attention)

Be Creative!

There will be cake and ice cream and plenty of treats for the birthday boy!

Then, let the party commence!

What makes this even more annoying is it's from the girl who also invited all our female friends to her Pampered Chef wedding shower five hours away, and in the invitation said she knew that most of us couldn't come, so could we all please help them out by buying stuff off of their Pampered Chef website so they could get freebies. The majority of us who receive this invitation weren't invited to the wedding. This person is really weird and socially awkward, and I have the feeling she doesn't even realize how rude it is to ask for gifts. I'm debating whether I should send her a message letting her know that her request for cat presents is in poor taste, and if I do how I should word it. Any thoughts?

nda_roxybabe · May 2010

She's having a birthday party....for her cat?
huh.

FutureMsAlexander · May 2010

I'm so confused by this. This chick is throwing her cat a party? People do this?

buddhagouda · May 2010

That's weird on so many levels that I'm going to guess this girl is beyond help.

ricksang · May 2010

Whut???!!!

cac847 · May 2010

Yes, she's throwing a birthday party for her cat.

Aedes* · May 2010

Wow, That is awful. I would just not go. And if you really were feeling bold tell her why you don't plan on attending. If she is really so naive then I would say something. But it is hard to believe that anyone wouldn't understand that this is not proper etiquette.

laurenclaire1386 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-gifts-second-time-would-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6cbe2198-0112-4ba6-a40a-180a46d17253Post:07f2e67f-65aa-460f-ac30-0956835c5104">Re: Asking for gifts for a second time. Would you say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]She's having a birthday party....for her cat? huh.
Posted by nda_roxybabe[/QUOTE]
This. That's just...weird. I wouldn't say anything though. Chances are, it wouldn't go over very well with your friend. Obviously, she sees nothing wrong with it and will come up with every possible justification for her ridiculous behaviour. I really think it's best to leave well enough alone. Although I do agree: this is weird and really rude.

laurenclaire1386 · May 2010

But if she were to ever ask you why you didn't attend the cat party, or buy from her Pampered Chef website, I wouldn't hesitate to tell her why. I just wouldn't initiate the conversation.

luckyme502 · May 2010

I would not attend a party for a cat's birthday. Maybe it's a joke and just an excuse party, but with the gift list I"m not so sure.

FutureMsAlexander · May 2010

Is this your friend?

andy71781 · May 2010

Ummm I'm the craziest pet lover ever and I don't throw parties for them. This woman needs a hobby.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-gifts-second-time-would-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6cbe2198-0112-4ba6-a40a-180a46d17253Post:21ca538b-942f-4ec2-acfc-44013c83501c">Re: Asking for gifts for a second time. Would you say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]That's weird on so many levels that I'm going to guess this girl is beyond help.
Posted by buddhagouda[/QUOTE]

<div>This.</div><div>
</div><div>My cats would also not be okay with this idea. They tend to go sleep under the bed when lots of people come over.</div>

jnic0319 · May 2010

I would let this one go, sounds like something is seriously wrong with her, your comment may not help at all and will probably cause more problems than it is worth.

KentuckyKate · May 2010

I think it's kind of funny the cat's name has been redacted for anonymity in the OP.

And yeah, that is bizarro.

cac847 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-gifts-second-time-would-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6cbe2198-0112-4ba6-a40a-180a46d17253Post:483f403c-903d-456b-8442-3f56a199062a">Re: Asking for gifts for a second time. Would you say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]Is this your friend?
Posted by FutureMsAlexander[/QUOTE]

::snort::

psichick · May 2010

i get my cats bday presents, but i would not throw them a party. maybe as a joke or something i might have a bbq and claim it was for the cats, but not seriously.

shellydiane820 · May 2010

i thought it was funny.

that being said, I wouldn't attend, but I'd laugh upon recieving the invite.

robinmichael · May 2010

Oh how incredibly hilariously awkward. She is beyond help. Please be nice though if she asks why you didn't attend Spanky's party, or you'll have crazy cat lady on your hands.

lisarose7 · May 2010

I'd be tempted to hand her a bag of garbage when I get there and tell her there are plenty of things in it her cat would love to play with. And I'd bring my dog as my date.

ootmother2 · May 2010

A little weird, yes. But then, at Kinkos this afternoon, the woman beside me was putting together picture death notices of her cat to be sent out to her friends.

weird

mishy112 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-gifts-second-time-would-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6cbe2198-0112-4ba6-a40a-180a46d17253Post:483f403c-903d-456b-8442-3f56a199062a">Re: Asking for gifts for a second time. Would you say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]Is this your friend?
Posted by FutureMsAlexander[/QUOTE]

Lol!

I used to be friends with a woman who had bday parties for her cats. She would get all excited about it, so I didn't have the heart to burst her bubble and tell her that I thought it was dumb. She didn't request gifts, but she did get or make a cake saying "Happy Birthday, _____". Then she would ask why I didn't want to have a bday party for my dog. Awkward.

Are you invested in the relationship with said friend? If not, I would distance myself from her and definitely not attend these gatherings. Or, borrow a dog and bring it to the party and say you thought the cat wanted a playmate for its bday. (j/k on the last part, in case it's not obvious)

colsta · May 2010

At first I thought maybe she was collecting donations to give to the shelter, but doesn't seem so. I have a friend like this who just doesn't get it. I don't think it does any good in the long run to explain to them what is wrong with the situation. She may just think in really concrete terms. She would probably take away "Don't give gift list for cats" but wouldn't understand the general concept of it being rude to give gift lists and request gifts.

Mrs.B6302007 · May 2010

I have a friend who has thrown bday parties for her dogs but they're not like this. There are no gifts involved; it's really just an excuse to get together for playtime. She invites her friends with dogs and they meet up at the dog park and play. She usually buys dog treats for all of the 4 legged "guests" as "cake" and that's it.

Kristin&eric · May 2010

OMG that is soooo WERiD! You should buy a stuffed dog that barks!! Haha just kidding, dont waste your money on her. Thats just weird

Trishes · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-gifts-second-time-would-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6cbe2198-0112-4ba6-a40a-180a46d17253Post:07f2e67f-65aa-460f-ac30-0956835c5104">Re: Asking for gifts for a second time. Would you say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]She's having a birthday party....for her cat? huh.
Posted by nda_roxybabe[/QUOTE]

And requesting presents? For her cat?

janedoe1113a · May 2010

That's just strange.

Krysti21 · May 2010

This is insane.

bonnyandtim · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-gifts-second-time-would-say-something?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:6cbe2198-0112-4ba6-a40a-180a46d17253Post:5c77e518-2b37-4eef-81a6-e228e7745b2e">Re: Asking for gifts for a second time. Would you say something?</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm so confused by this. This chick is throwing her cat a party? People do this?
Posted by FutureMsAlexander[/QUOTE]

Seriously!

Asking for gifts for a second time. Would you say something?

Re: Asking for gifts for a second time. Would you say something?

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