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March 2012 Weddings
ahaggerty
member
Anyone else go back and forth about waiting to long to get hitched?
I have anxiety sometimes about waiting so long. It seems like everyone thinks I'm silly for planning so far in advance..and since my fiance and I already have a baby,what i'm waiting for/...St Patrick's Day is so important to me because it was my Grandparents Anniversary!.... I'm sticking to my guns..but just wondering if anyone else ever second guesses themselveS?
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Re: Anyone else go back and forth about waiting to long to get hitched?
Then I remember, I know I would look back and hate that that's how I got married (no offense to anyone who is, just isn't for me). Then I remind myself that I want to be married but in the way I envisioned and that means having patience - because I know in the end, after all this waiting...I'll have my dream wedding.
FI and I were supposed to be getting married this coming March, but the money wasn't adding up and we were cutting things that we really wanted - sand ceremony, the resort, the actual destination. I finally decided that I wanted those things and if we didn't have the money then, that we'd push it back a year (the date is really important to us too) and we'd have more money then.
I think people forget too that sometimes parents aren't helping with wedding costs. I know my dad might help put in some money - it would be towards the AHR, not the actual wedding tho. My mom on the other hand...I'm not even sure she'll show up to the wedding, much less put in money (long story, but basically she doesn't ever want to go to Jamaica and will miss my wedding because of it).
I also feel like I'll have a much better wedding waiting than I would not waiting.
Keep your head up and don't give in. It's your special day and, call it being a bridezilla or whatever, but you should have it when and how you want it to be - within reason of course.
**Whenever I'm alone with you, you make me feel like I am home again; Whenever I'm alone with you; You make me feel like I am whole again**
Good luck with your planning!!
**Whenever I'm alone with you, you make me feel like I am home again; Whenever I'm alone with you; You make me feel like I am whole again**
Besides the time will fly by!
Personally, when I feel that I'm waiting too long I look back and realize it's mostly other people's questions making me think this, not me actually wanting to change it! It helps to keep that in mind. What works for you is what works for you, no matter if people think it's "too long."
A funny my mom said: Maybe they just really want wedding cake! Helps me to think of it in a light-hearted way.
Good luck and stick to your guns - it is YOUR wedding!
We originally planned on July 3rd, 2011. Adam works at a factory, and it takes him a really long time to build up vacation time. But the plant closes for the week of the 4th of July...so we thought if we got married on Sunday the 3rd, we could have that week be the honeymoon since he'd already have the time off! But the more we got into the planning, the more it just wasn't falling together.
To start, we're doing this all on our own. Adam's parents don't support the wedding at all (his dad and I have never gotten along, which basically breaks my heart) so we're not getting any help from them. As for my family, well, my dad passed away in April. My mom and sister are living with Adam and I (in our tiny one bedroom house...ugh!!!) until they can get back on their feet. Plus, we were having budget troubles in that amount of time since we currently have 2 extra people to provide for and support.
We were gonna try for a later time next year, but, again, nothing was adding up. Pushing it back a month into August wasn't going to make any significant difference at all in money. September was a no-go because my cousin is getting married that month in Texas so that means her family along with my aunt and uncle wouldn't be able to make it, which is not an option for me, haha...I want them there!! October would only work if we did it late in the month because Kerri (my cousin) is getting married in late September...so it'd be too close and too expensive for her family to travel to Texas and then up to Iowa if I did mine right after hers. But late October wasn't gonna work because our friends Nycole & Damian (who are in our wedding party) got married in late October...we don't want to do the same thing as them. And planning around the holidays in November and December just wasn't an option...I have family that has to travel from California, Arizona, all over the place. Getting all that figured out along with their own holiday travels was just a mess waiting to happen.
When I look back at it, I'm sooo glad I've put it off as long as I have. You will find as you go through the next year that the date you picked really was for the best...for YOU. It doesn't matter if it's for the best for others...as long as it works out for you and your FI in the end. As much as I hate the waiting game and am not looking forward to the long, dragged out year of planning, I try to keep on the positive side. Remember that all this work your going through is for YOUR and your FI's day. Make the best out of the planning and enjoy every moment of it...because as taxing as it can be sometimes, those are the memories you're gonna look back on and remember for the rest of your lives together
[QUOTE]The money is the first issue, so waiting for so long we can actually afford everything... i hope. Ettiquette says that if you live together, then it's up to you to pay for the wedding. I just moved in when we got engaged, so Im not sure where I fit exactly. I am the oldest daughter of 4 and the first to get married.My parents are divorced and both remarried. Oh- And I have a HUGE family. Trying to keep things simple is driving me crazy!
Posted by luckycharms360[/QUOTE]
Luckycharms - I feel you so much about BOTH! Knottie soul mates? Haha jk.
The money thing - we are both in college (for about 7 more months - which is why we're waiting until 2012) but we moved in together because why should we both pay rent when we can just pay one? We were going to be together all the time anyway. Anyway, enough about WHY. How I'm handling this is: If they offer to pay (aka my side OR his) then we will graciously accept. But what I got from Etiquette board is that you never ask. My family has implied that they want to pay, but since 2012 is so far away, we haven't even really discussed it yet. I guess we will both just have to see what happens.
And yes. Both parents are divorced and remarried, making my sib-count 6. Literally, we have 50+ just immediate family-ish. SIMPLE feels really hard. BUT I want to share my "revelation" with you: Simple doesn't have to do with numbers of people, but rather how the day goes and how it is decorated, etc.
Oh that felt good - sorry ladies, had to put in my other $.02