When I first got engaged, I had trouble thinking of who I would ask to be my MOH and BM. I have never had many friends, and originally my fiance and I were planning a short engagement, so I felt a little pressure to be making decisions quickly. At first I didn't want to ask my sister to be my MOH because she can be so opinionated and passive aggressive, but everyone talked me into it, and when I talked to her she raved about how much she loves weddings and how much she would love to help me and blah blah blah. She had just been married the year before so I decided logically it was a great decision. I asked her and she said yes. Now 3 months later, my fiance and I have moved our wedding to June of next year so that we could have the wedding we want instead of a rushed/stressful mess of a day.
Everytime I try to talk about my wedding my sister changes the subject to something unrelated revolving around her. When she does talk about the wedding with me, she is rude and tells me my ideas aren't going to work, or that she regrets not doing something someway so I should do it that way. She is dead set on us having our wedding in Hawaii, and when I tell her that is absolutely not even an option in our minds she just gets mad and pushy.
I really don't understand what her deal is, and she keeps referring to herself as "the most important person". I am really struggling and I honestly want to ask her to step down before she causes me more stress. I feel like if she's the one standing next to me on my day it will be a big fat lie. It's like the MOH is assumed to be the supporter of the bride, and in the case that she does the opposite of that I don't want her to be credited with that title?
I have made two good friends in the past few months and I would like to ask one of them to be my MOH and my sister could just be a BM with the other girls I have in mind.
I've also considered changing her title to Matron of Honor, asking the girl i want as Maid of honor, and just kinda including her more than my sister. These two other girls have been nothing but supportive and positive and that's the energy I want surrounding me rather than the negative, "I know it all" attitude.
I realize that this is "not proper" but I would rather ask her now in my early planning process than wait and let her put a damper on my day.
Any insight for me?