My parents are paying for and hosting the entire wedding. My FILs are really not involved in wedding planning and haven't really shown an interest in it. They are also from another country where the wedding customs are different and where there is no such thing as a "rehearsal dinner." They also have like, no money. So, when my stepmother told me that we need to get going with the rehearsal dinner, and that my FILs need to get on top of that, I reminded her of these factors. I honestly do not see them hosting it or being able to pay for it. She told me that she would be happy if they gave a "token contribution" and "officially hosted it," and that she and my dad would just pay for the rest. While that is a generous offer, I also do not think its right for my parents to pay for the RD AND the wedding. I also do not feel that I am the right person to tell my FILs "Hey, here in America we have a big expensive dinner the night before the wedding and it's hosted by the groom's family. So... yeah, talk my parents about that." (In nicer words, of course)
Well, I spoke to my fiance about it. He and his brother regularly help their parents out financially, and his response was that by asking them to pay for the RD, essentially, it's he who would be paying even though it would be his parents who are "hosting." He said that he is fine with this. I, however, am uncomfortable with it, and am wondering if maybe the tactful solution would be for us to host our own rehearsal dinner. My thoughts are that if brides and grooms can host their own weddings, why not rehearsal dinners.
By the way, the RD would probably have 25 people, including immediate fam, the bridal party, and everyone's spouses or SOs. We'll probably do it at a family style restaurant that isn't terribly pricey but could still come out to $20 a person.
Opinions? Thoughts? Suggestions?
173 Invites are in the mail!
58 are ready to party!
32 are missing out.
83 are nowhere to be found.
RSVP date is November 1.