nwr - How did you know

shellydiane820 · August 2010

What you wanted to do careerwise?

I seriously haven't the slightest. I've done the court reporting/legal secretary thing for almost 5 years, and I hate it. I have no idea what I'm "passionate" about.

I feel like crap.

This might be a post and run as I have to leave for work soon, but I look forward to reading thoughts.

jasmineh7777 · August 2010

I work two jobs right now. One is just okay. The other one, I feel really happy when I accomplish something, and I want to gush about it when I get home.
I think if you love something, you're going to want to gush about it.

shellydiane820 · August 2010

That's my problem, I can't think of anything I enjoy gushing about.

Jelenny · August 2010

I am stuck too...hopefully after I whittle down the student loans I can become more adventurous than being a corporate drone...

But the best advise I was ever given was by the college footbal coach (I was a manager)...Coach Nick said upon retiring, "I should go get a job so I can officially retire, you see, when you enjoy what you do every day and you are passionate about it - you are not working. Lucky for me in the 28 years here I never worked a day in my life."

number55 · August 2010

I picked teaching for good reasons and bad reasons:

good: I had a summer job between 2nd year and 3rd year of my undergrad and it was at a non profit literacy organization. It made me interested in literacy.

bad: I was engaged throughout my undergrad, in an unhealthy relationship where my FI wasn't in university and wanted me out of university as quickly as possible. Teacher's college was only a year and so I took it.

I love my job at times and hate it at others. There are other things I could do but I don't want to go back for more schooling because I make about $80k a year and I don't want to give up that, my pension and summers off. I certainly don't hate my job enough to give those things up. And really, most days I do really like it.

I don't know if that answers your question at all.

laurenclaire1386 · August 2010

I didn't know for a long, long, long time. I went to college with the intention of being a teacher, an English teacher. Then I started bartending while I was going to school. I loved it. I made a shitload of money, worked usually only 4 days a week, got promoted, and was running a bar at 21. So screw teaching, I want a bar of my own. Then I stumbled into this whole paralegal thing by running into a guy I used to wait on at said bar. Turns out, law is where I wanna work. I don't wanna go to law school for a number of reasons, but I definitely want to stay in the field. The money is good, and I like having strictly day time hours.

Not knowing what you want to do is one of the most unnerving feelings. I felt like a complete loser/failure when I was working minimum wage jobs and not knowing what I wanted to do. My mom and FI were both really supportive and told me to do whatever I wanted, take as much time as I needed to figure stuff out. Just because you don't know now what you want to do doesn't mean you won't know forever. It's ok to waffle. It's ok to be indecisive. It's ok to not know. You'll figure it out. I'm still not entirely sure I'll end up being a paralegal forever, but for right now, it's a great fit.

Celles · August 2010

I kind of fell into a career. I never actually decided on one. I wish I had words of wisdom for you, Shelly, but the truth is I often feel the same way. So in lieu of sage advice, I'll just send virtual *hugs* your way.

eta - I'm a credit manager. I love the company I work for but I hate numbers, so working under the accounting umbrella is not a fantastic fit. My degree is in psychology, but I worked part time for CitiFinancial throughout college; by the time I graduated, my work experience was worth more than my bachelor's, so I stayed in the industry.

[Deleted User] · August 2010

I've always loved to write. I can't explain why other than to say that it's the only thing that ever made sense to me. It's the one thing I always come back to no matter what I'm doing, how I feel, what's going on in my life. My mom is a firm believer that it's what I was meant to do. It makes me happy. Doesn't make me a lot of moeny, but I love doing it.

SarahPLiz · August 2010

Accounting is very practical and logical. I took a class in HS, decided that the principles made sense to me, and there I went. I wasn't all gung ho and passionate about it, but I knew it was a practical career track, and it wasn't really very challenging. I like being good at what I do and having a marketable skill that I can use to support myself.

Everyone thinks that Accountants have to be good with higher math, but that is entirely untrue. Actuaries have to be good with higher math. I suck at higher math because it is not concrete enough for me. All i need to do is add, subtract, multiply and divide, and put things in categories.

ETA: Accounting DID, however, introduce me to the world of fraud examination and forensics, and I AM passionate about that. It is definitely a challenge.

Nebb · August 2010

Ive never had a concrete idea ive just fallen into one job after another. I took business and got a job as a receptionist, then got another job as a receptionist and was promoted to rental administrator out of necessity and I loved it but my boss was crazy. I got my taste of power so I have been aiming for office management ever since then and am pretty much there now. Im happy enough, its not like im wonderfully thrilled and fulfilled or anything but it pays the bills and im good at it.

shellydiane820 · August 2010

Ugh, I feel like shiit. (sorry to be so blunt)

I got lectured today about my negative attitude with court reporting. I'm so over it, its not even funny. I hate the idea of quitting bc I'm almost done, but I hate my machine and I never practice, so I'll never be done. Either way I fee like a failure.

My legal secretary job is okay, but I definitely couldn't do this for the long haul. It just sucks. Especially since Nick has found his niche, and even though we're married, I feel like he's moving on and I'm just stuck. Like, I went from leeching off my parents to leeching off him. I wish I could figure something out.

shellydiane820 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_nwr-did?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:11b95df5-3aa4-41fb-aa8c-8937cfde4f04Post:60e2f1ff-8c8d-45c9-a542-ed3e49527fa5">Re: nwr - How did you know</a>:
[QUOTE]I've always loved to write. I can't explain why other than to say that it's the only thing that ever made sense to me. It's the one thing I always come back to no matter what I'm doing, how I feel, what's going on in my life. My mom is a firm believer that it's what I was meant to do. It makes me happy. Doesn't make me a lot of moeny, but I love doing it.
Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]

I want this feeling. I can't write, but something that makes me feel this good.

kpwedkk · August 2010

As a young bee, we (my siblings and I) got exposed to different career paths.. Mine has always been looking up at the sky, and having a passion for space, and aircraft. So engineering was a likely choice. I think one has to move around to challenge your brain from time to time.

I guess, if you want to go back to school, but you don't know in what, what did you get good grades in high school? Maybe that might be a key to what you were good at... what did you like math and science, or the arts and media, or a mixture of both?

If you are a student, this place has a lot of internships, to see if a career is good or not for your skills, and gush

http://www.internships.com/index/1

katiewhompus · August 2010

I have no clue what I want in a career. I've just started writing down things that I like to do and seeing what jobs fit the bill. My mom thinks I should go back to school for a Psych degree because those jobs fit better, but that just isn't feasible in the near future.
So far the list seems to be leaning towards administration work (love of organizing papers, invoices, filing, etc) or event planning.
I do know whatever I do I don't want to be the top person. I'm really enjoying being an assistant.

AdeleDazeem · August 2010

I fell ass backwards into my career, but I love it. I picked a major in college that would challenge me and I followed it to its logical conclusion (first job, grad school, now career).

Honestly, I really like any job that would allow me freedom to run things as I see fit. I want to be in charge to a certain extent of my hours, how my work is run, money, etc.. That fits into several different careers that appeal to me: running a small business/lab/store. If I wasn't working in science, I'd probably follow ones of those things.

shellydiane820 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_nwr-did?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:11b95df5-3aa4-41fb-aa8c-8937cfde4f04Post:bb3a40ba-8d99-4233-916c-249620caef03">Re: nwr - How did you know</a>:
[QUOTE]As a young bee, we (my siblings and I) got exposed to different career paths.. Mine has always been looking up at the sky, and having a passion for space, and aircraft. So engineering was a likely choice. I think one has to move around to challenge your brain from time to time. I guess, if you want to go back to school, but you don't know in what, what did you get good grades in high school? Maybe that might be a key to what you were good at... what did you like math and science, or the arts and media, or a mixture of both? If you are a student, this place has a lot of internships, to see if a career is good or not for your skills, and gush :) <a href="http://www.internships.com/index/1" rel="nofollow">http://www.internships.com/index/1</a>
Posted by kpwedkk[/QUOTE]

That's another problem. I never excelled in anything. I did okay in everything, I never failed. An example is my sister, she was awesome at math and science (but somehow majored in ESL?) I did alright in everything.

I'm good at sex, maybe I should just be barefoot and pregnant.

MarriedInAFever · August 2010

I'm still figuring it out. I have a few things I'm very passionate about, but none of them are very lucrative and have limited opportunities. But I'm pursuing them anyway because I enjoy them and they make me happy.

Shelly, it sounds like you just haven't found something you're passionate about YET. But I have faith that you will. You just need to examine your interests and think about what you would enjoy doing. Your passion doesn't have to be your career. You may just need a career that allows you enough time to focus on your family life. Your family can be your passion.

number55 · August 2010

I will be honest...my career choice also had a lot to do with being financially independent as a woman. My mother never finished university (due to an illness) and had no real career to speak of. If my father had died when we were kids she would have had serious problems finding work that could support all three kids.

I chose a career that made good money and that was very very secure. Short of doing something really stupid (and gross) with a kid, I will always have a teaching job. I never have to worry about being laid off and I make enough $ that I could, if I had to, theoretically support myself (as I have been doing for 9 years) and children (it would be tight but doable).

number55 · August 2010

Shelly...have you considered going to see a career planner...they have all sorts of quizzes and strategies to help you figure out what might best suit you...

shellydiane820 · August 2010

Well, I am off to work, thanks for the input

I might be lurking while at work, but we've been busy so maybe not.

shellydiane820 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_nwr-did?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:11b95df5-3aa4-41fb-aa8c-8937cfde4f04Post:f0fc5738-28bc-4220-8628-5f0fb1fe2f93">Re: nwr - How did you know</a>:
[QUOTE]Shelly...have you considered going to see a career planner...they have all sorts of quizzes and strategies to help you figure out what might best suit you...
Posted by number55[/QUOTE]

I have not, but I will definitely look into that!

katiewhompus · August 2010

Aw Shelly you sound like me a week ago *big hugs*

Here's what my dad told me when we were driving and I started crying because I have no clue what to do with my life and couldn't afford to live without govt help if something happened to Scott and I suck at everything and am good at nothing.

Very few people in this world actually know what they want to do before they hit their 30's, or even their 40's. The image of the young person set in their career is not the norm, but is pushed as the norm because it is the ideal to our current society. It's kind of like how the "own a house, have 3 kids" is also the "norm'.
Most people work a bunch of different jobs until they fall into something that works for them and you know what, that's perfectly fine. In this economy it might actually be a really good thing because you have diversity. When Scott changed jobs it was fairly easy because he has a wide background, while my other friend who spent the last 10 years in his career job is still unemployed because that is all he knows how to do.
Plus, you don't have to be great at every aspect of a job to be great at the job. Also most things that you are bad at will improve as you work on them, especially in a job setting verses a school setting.
Think about all the jobs you've had, from a teenager until now, and think about what you enjoyed about them. Not what you were best at or worst at, but what you truly enjoyed about them. You aren't going to love every second of any job, and you aren't going to be great at every single aspect of it, but if you find one with things you love then the rest won't matter.

Says the girl with no career, but still, I think his advice is valid

Oh, and most of my friends who are 26 and already working in their careers hate their jobs, but feel so invested in their "career" that they can't/won't leave. So I guess there are two sides to everything.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

I've always wanted to be a reporter - and I have no idea why. I've just always loved writing and telling stories. I used to love pretending that I was a April O'neil or Lois Lane - any reporter I saw on TV or in movies, I was fascinated with. I loved reading the paper, or watching the local news. I used to sit in front of the mirror and practice my news delivery.

Biiiiiiiiiiig dork.

I think I just got lucky though. My sister got a degree in surgical tech - and doesn't use it. My next sister has no idea what to major in.

JenGin74 · August 2010

When they fire me from this dump I think I'd like to try real estate. I know there's no money in it right now, but I have a feeling I'd really enjoy it. I'll take happiness over money any day.

[Deleted User] · August 2010

I second talking to a carrer planner, or even someone offering life coach-type services since they offer insights you may not have thought of before.

For me, I've always known what I wanted and had to accept that it would be a very long and difficult road. And what I want may not ever even become my reality, I know that. So in the meantime I've had to find a job that relates to what I want and doesn't make me want to bash my head against the wall.

BioGirl21 · August 2010

I always wanted to be a doctor throughout high school and college. Then my senior year I just changed my mind, I have no idea why(that sounds dumb, but I seriously woke up one day saying "I don't want to be a doctor"). Then I wanted to be a nurse but I took an intro to nursing class and decided it wasn't for me. Now I want to be a registered dietician. I took a nutrition class senior year of college and I really loved it and I love running so I think I might also do some kind of personal training certification, I'm not sure.
The only thing that I have known my whole life is that I don't want a primarily desk job.

SarahPLiz · August 2010

there are plenty of life coaches and employment planners that you could consult. Have you ever read "What Color is your Parachute?" I am told it is a great way to find hidden talents.

FWIW, when I took a career type test in HS, it told me I'd be a truck driver or a postal worker. I don't think I'd be unhappy at either.

rubyjem00 · August 2010

I know exactly how you feel. Everyone says "follow your passion" but I am just not sure what that is. I have been working through that book "What Color is Your Parachute." It is designed for people looking for jobs and people who want to change careers.

I am at the career change place right now. I have an advanced degree but I don't like what I am doing. The book has been kinda helpful thus far - I haven't gotten all the way though it. But I have committed to doing to exercises in the book and I hope that in the end, I will be closer to figuring out what I am doing.

My mom told me once that I am responsible for the choices I make. If I am miserable, I made the choices to get to that point and I alone can make the choices to get out. So I keep reminding myself that it is up to me to do what is necessary to find a career that I like.

Good luck!

jasmineh7777 · August 2010

A lot depends on personality as well- Do you like to be organized? Do you like to be creative? Do you like to help people?
Maybe a personality inventory could give you a direction.

I know I like being creative. I like helping people, and working with kids. I'm a clincial psych major, and I work with kids that have autism. What I want in a job is to feel like I am making a positive impact.

Maybe you want freedom to be your own boss? Or you like managing others? Try listing the things you like, and then your strengths, and see where that takes you.

Feel free to think out loud here. Maybe people will have some cool suggestions.

katiewhompus · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_nwr-did?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:11b95df5-3aa4-41fb-aa8c-8937cfde4f04Post:3bc06733-9971-4f8b-9082-795a894e5f51">Re: nwr - How did you know</a>:
[QUOTE]there are plenty of life coaches and employment planners that you could consult. Have you ever read "What Color is your Parachute?" I am told it is a great way to find hidden talents. FWIW, when I took a career type test in HS, it told me I'd be a truck driver or a postal worker. I don't think I'd be unhappy at either.
Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

I'm apparently supposed to be an air engineer for the military...that would be...interesting. Ironically Scott was an aircraft mechanic while in the Marines so maybe it thought I was him?

katiewhompus · August 2010

Confession - I'm scared to read that book because I don't want it to tell me I'd be awesome at something that requires a lot of schooling.

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