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South Asian Weddings

Trip to India... ideas wanted

We're leaving in about 10 days for SIL's wedding.  There are a couple of things I'm having a hard time deciding about and want opinions:

1.  There will be 2 wedding events.  I am taking one sari from here and MIL has another one for me there.  Should I take back-ups and if so how many?

2.  I am taking everyday sandals plus shoes for the events.  I am also taking hiking boots because DH and I are planning to visit Ellora and Ajanta.  I know I won't wear closed shoes at any other time because of the weather.  However, it is 47 degrees and pouring rain here and we are flying through Frankfurt.  Would you wear the hiking boots on that long of a flight or take another pair of shoes you wouldn't use and would have to carry around?  Also, the hiking boots are heavier and bigger than any of the sandals (thus adding to the luggage).

3.  SIL has forced us out of our room (she and her delicate FI need ventilation and a western toilet, and DH somehow thinks I do not), so we will be sharing a bathroom with ILs and everyone else.  My ILs are pretty conservative so DH told me I need to wear a robe over my pyjamas.  Any suggestions that would be less horrible in 100 degree weather?

4.  DH doesn't like silwar kameez or any suits.  He thinks if we go to a dinner in a nice hotel in Rajasthan it's fine for me to wear jeans.  Is this true?

5.  I'm planning on buying bangles in India.  I have some kundun ones from the wedding and I want to buy different colors to go with them.  Is there any rule of thumb for how many you wear at once?

Re: Trip to India... ideas wanted

  • 1. Yes. Take two additional outfits in case. If the sari your MIL has bought you is brand new, the blouse may or may not fit for some reason. It happens. Just prepare and then you'll have nothing to worry about.
    2. Wear the hiking boots. If you want, pack a pair of old navy flip flops (or some cheap $1 brand) in your hand luggage if you want a break. It'll save you space in your bag and you won't need to pack a pair of shoes you won't wear.
    3. Are we surprised about your SIL? Get a cotton robe from TJ Maxx and you will be okay. Maybe stick with linen pajamas or a long nightgown that goes down to your feet that is made of cotton. It may be ugly, but you'll be comfortable.
    4. I would wear a heavy kurti and leggings (so cheap in India) if that's the case. But, I would STILL wear a salwar kameez. If he doesn't like the typical kind, go to a tailor and have them construct you an outfit more to his liking. Just protect yourself so you won't have to face disappointing your MIL or any other relatives. At the end of the day, if it's just one or two nights, I am sure he can live.
    6. There is no rule for how many you can wear at once. Unless you are a bride and are expected to be adorned heavily before, during, and directly after the wedding, I haven't seen people accesorize with many. But why not? If it's something you enjoy, load up on the bangles.

    Have a fun and safe trip. Take pictures. Ignore your SIL. Get a bucket of ice and a fan to keep cool. Bring one of those fans that has a bottle of water attached to it and remember you're a good SIL and daughter in law and fantastic wife for putting up with what you do. God knows I'd have flipped by now :)
  • I have no real advice on any of this but I wanted to say yay, your trip is coming up! :)
    My blog
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    "I will greatly rejoice in the LORD, My soul shall be joyful in my God; For He has clothed me with the garments of salvation, He has covered me with the robe of righteousness, As a bridegroom decks himself with ornaments, And as a bride adorns herself with her jewels." -Isaiah 61:10 NKJV
  • 1. I agree with Sonali that maybe having a backup outfit or two is a good idea. Remember the bubblegum pink sari she bought you when you were getting married? I hope this sari is better than that, but it's always better to have your own options.

    2. Agree with Sonali here again. Then you can also use the cheapie flip flops in India if you need to for any reason as well.

    3. They have these really awful, long night gowns in India that many women in my family wear. Would that be acceptable? But when I say horrible, they are pretty ugly. So maybe finding a long from here before you go is a better idea. Or wearing a kurta top and leggings in light fabric might work as pjs?

    4. I don't think I'd wear jeans to the nicer hotel restaurants, but I don't think that would be bad either with a dressier top maybe? Or again, I like Sonali's idea of going with a kurta top and leggings.

    5. I don't know of a rule of how many bangles you can wear. I usually decide on how many depending on the thickness of them. If the bangle is thicker, than maybe just one or two. If it's thinner than maybe 5 or 6? Try some on and see what looks good and feels comfortable. When I wear a sari and the matching bangles, if it's for a wedding etc, I will wear more than I would for everyday wear.

    Enjoy your trip!
    ExerciseMilestone
  • temurlangtemurlang member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited March 2012
    1.  Haha Raangoli, that was SIL!!!  The sari MIL has was given for our wedding but she had the blouse made for SIL who rejected it as "too traditional" (it's an orange benarasi).  SIL and I are VERY different physical types and DH thinks they may not be able to alter it to fit me.  SIL has also asked FIL to go to Varanasi (where my wedding sari came from) and buy one completely identical to my wedding sari.  So I'm a little hesitant about taking that one as it will somehow offend her.  I don't actually have very many.  Hmm...  DH may have to take me shopping!

    2.  I have flip flops... I need them for Asian bathrooms lol!

    3.  Sonali -- no, I wasn't at all surprised.  Sometimes I think SIL lies awake thinking of ways to annoy as many people as possible simultaneously.

    Is there such thing as a "sleep silwar kameez"?  If so, what would I ask for in a shop?  MIL wears a sari at night.    I'm pretty curvy... should I wear a bra at night too?

    4.  DH often doesn't know these things.  I thought probably at least a kurta with leggings would be better.  IDK what his issue is with the suits, but he claims the women he grew up around NEVER wore them.

    5.  It sounds like I can't mess up with the bangles!  I don't wear much jewelry so I often feel I'm overdoing it when I wear Indian clothes.

  • Yes, you should be fine. I have never heard of a sleep kurta. I could never sleep with a bra so when you wake up, put yours back on before you leave the room and you should be good.

  • In Response to Re: Trip to India... ideas wanted:
    [QUOTE]Yes, you should be fine. I have never heard of a sleep kurta. I could never sleep with a bra so when you wake up, put yours back on before you leave the room and you should be good.
    Posted by SonaliPop[/QUOTE]

    It does seem like it would be really uncomfortable, especially in hot weather!
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