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Mom's Dress for the Wedding?

cechappellcechappell
in Attire & Accessories Forum
So when I started all my wedding planning, my mom wanted me to look at her dress that she wore at her wedding. Its beautiful don't get me wrong. When I tried it on, although it was a few sizes to small for me, I told my mom I would wear it. Now, as I have looked at a bunch of other dresses, I realize I want my own dress, something different. I had always thought I would wear a certain type of dress. Now I don't know how to tell my mom I don't want to wear her dress with out offending her. 
Any ideas?
Thanks!
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Re: Mom's Dress for the Wedding?

  • katieanne85katieanne85
    100 Comments
    This isnt something we can give you advice on really, either you have a good enough relationship with your mom that you can talk to her freely about these things or you dont, obviously you dont if your asking for help, but if your mom is going to be offended that you want to dress yourself then Im going to bet she is easily offended at other things too, how do you handle those times?
    If you usually go along with it then this is a great oppourtunity to assert yourself as an adult, respectrfully and maturely. Tell her you want to look at other dresses and would she like to help? if its that big a deal find some other wedding detail you can compromise on to appease her.

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  • opalsky007opalsky007 member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    I'm sorry you're having to deal with this.

    I'd just sit down and have a talk with her and say, "Mom, I know we talked about me wearing your wedding gown. I love it and it's beautiful, and I'm so thankful that you offered it to me. But it was perfect for you, and I'd like to wear something that's perfect for me."

    If you want to wear something of hers and she's open to the idea of cutting her dress, you might be able to use some of the beading or lace on your own dress or veil. Or if she has a crinoline, you could have a veil  made from the tulle. If she's not open to that, maybe you could suggest wearing some of her jewelry as your  "something borrowed".

    Good luck!
    image
    Miss Mrs.
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  • dizzineadizzinea
    1000 Comments

    it's too small, that is really hard to fix, too big is easy too small, is hard without damaging or altering that, explain that to your mom and maybe go shopping together.

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  • scpalmtree06scpalmtree06 member
    100 Comments
    I agree with PPs, be honest with her in a loving way.  You can start by saying something to the effect of, "I really appreciate you offering me your dress.  While it did seem like a good idea to wear it X months ago, I've since been thinking that I want to buy a dress of my own."

    Bottom line: You're allowed to change your mind.  Hopefully she will be supportive of your decision.
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