Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

assign people tasks in advance- don't cry like I did

Just a heads up, since I learned this the hard way.

If you have a special thing you are doing, be sure you assign someone to get the task ready and to break that task down. What I mean is this. We did a handfasting ceremony in my wedding. I did not give the task of collecting that said ribbon knot to anyone, I assumed my officant would give it to me. She actually gave it to the Venue coordinator that I had for the day, to hold for us while she got the signatures,who thought it was "scraps" and threw it away. If I had assigned someone to get it and keep it, then I would not have spent the following day trying to hunt it down, being lied to, and in the end crying because it was tossed. an "I'm sorry, but it was unimportant to me" from the Event Lady at my venue has me still livid.

Take my advice, please. Make a checklist, put it on your phone, mark a sticky. It takes 2 seconds.

Good luck and congrats!
Best, Serena

Re: assign people tasks in advance- don't cry like I did

  • Thanks for the advice. I probably actaully never would have thought about that. We aren't having a handfasting ceremony, but we are doing a ribbon relay and we'll probably want to keep the ribbon.
  • Maybe not "assigning tasks" so much as making sure to fully communicate prior to your wedding day. I had some similar oversights with my DOC (she didn't fully realize how important certain things were to me, etc).

    I realize, in retrospect, that communicating to all of the wedding party and event coordinators more in depth would have been a good idea!
  • edited September 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_assign-people-tasks-in-advance-dont-cry-like-i-did?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:434febed-4213-4a0e-bfcf-c1d48ddfca5ePost:fc0a7f1d-d4ca-47da-a630-42fb5cad0d0b">Re: assign people tasks in advance- don't cry like I did</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>Maybe not "assigning tasks" so much as making sure to fully communicate prior to your wedding day</strong>. I had some similar oversights with my DOC (she didn't fully realize how important certain things were to me, etc). I realize, in retrospect, that communicating to all of the wedding party and event coordinators more in depth would have been a good idea!
    Posted by itzMS[/QUOTE]

    This.  The only person who should ever be assigned tasks is a professional co-ordinator - and I say this as someone who was up at 6:00 a.m. decorating for my wedding at 6:00 p.m.
    Proud to be an old married hag!! image
  • You should put an "XP" in front of a post when you post on multiple boards.

    At least it sounds like you've calmed down a bit since your post on WW's. Does it suck that the ribbon is now lost forever? Yeah, it sure does but there's nothing that can be done about it now. Did you at least get pictures of it?
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Not sure, none from the guests there, maybe some from the professionals. I know I posted on a few boards, but I know I did not read but one or two when I was on here before i got married, and I didn't go into the Woes board.. one was the rant and one was the be sure to do this. I just know I did not see ANYTHING about this before my wedding, or I would have been more prepared.

    XP? Will do, what does it mean though? Anyway, thanks for listening ladies. i just needed to say it somewhere to have people understand the importance of it and I know you all would understand.
    Best, Serena
  • AdeleDazeemAdeleDazeem member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited September 2012
    XP means cross post - it indicates that you've posted the same thing on a few boards. 

    I do agree with GLB, though, about "assigning" roles to people.

    But, I feel you on the loss of something!  I made the rose petal liners for our aisle.  They were labor-intensive and great for outdoor ceremonies where you couldn't have blowing petals or stick anything in the ground.  I was going to sell them.  Our coordinator lost them after the ceremony.  How still completely boggles my mind - there was 30 feet of it.  Did you just throw it in the trash??  Grr.


  • Ahh got it.

    She lost that? Wow, yeah I wonder about that too.
    Best, Serena
  • I can't stand when hired professionals lose something...I gave my florist a big bow that was my mom's wedding headpiece to put it on the bouquet holder (the ribbon around the bouquet).  About 2 hour before the wedding, they called to told me they lost it.  I was so upset and worried my mom would be upset.  They said they would look for it after the wedding but never found it :(
    Anniversary
  • We made a list of every, single activity which needed to be done and associated each with a time and owner.  But I used to be an IT program manager; you don't kick off an important project without a detailed plan. 

    Both our photographer and venue manager commented to H that ours was the most efficiently run, ON TIME wedding they'd every worked.  Yee ha!!

  • Thank you for posting that, OP! My daughter is having a handfasting, also. I will make sure to be the one who has the ribbon safe. Great idea. 
  • I guess I got lucky. I didn't have any problems or need to "assign tasks." 
  • This is why I'm super glad I have an personal attendent because I assigned all the important stuff to her to hold onto, like the unity candle. I also have the ushers helping her out if she needs any help since the ushers asked if they could do more than just walk people in so I'm handing them over to my personal attendant. 
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