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Help! Where do we have the Wedding???

hurricanekthurricanekt member
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in Wedding Party
We are about 2 yrs away from getting married but in all the pre-planning we have yet to deceid what STATE to get married in!
My #1 problem? All but 4 people from my side of the family live 12 or MORE hrs  away!  His Family all live here in MS, but my family lives in VA, SC, and NY... and I'm not talking about cousins! I mean my mother (VA), father (SC), and grandparents (NY). They are all very important to me and I dont know what I would do with out them there. Not to mention how its gonna be sad to have them so far away during all the planning. We are not planning on having a MS wedding but is choosing a more "central" location, further north, so that it will be lighter travel on my far away family ok?? Or is it unfare to his family??
  Undecided  I don't know what to do!!
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Re: Help! Where do we have the Wedding???

  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I had my wedding in Maryland.  My parents live in Florida as does my Grandmother (only living grandparent left), my only sister lives in Texas.  H's sister lives in California.

    Did it suck that my parents weren't close by during the planning process, yes.  But I called all the time, skyped, emailed etc to get their opinions and such.  We planned trips for them to come up for dress shopping and food tastings and bridal showers.

    Honestly, why would you get married in a random state that doesn't really mean anything to you?

    My suggestion, get married in Mississippi.  Your close relatives will travel for your wedding if they really want to attend.  I cannot imagine your parents not coming just because the wedding isn't located in their home state.

    Our wedding we had about 25% of our guests travelling (meaning, staying over night).  None of them minded because they wanted to be there for our wedding.

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  • hurricanekthurricanekt member
    First Comment
    That's great! We really want to have it in TN. We LOVE it up there, but I am just worried about his family fighting us on it so they won't have to travel, My family is all for it though... I wasn't sure if there was a "right way" to go about choosing a place when it comes to family having to travel.
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  • mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker

    You both need to sit down and make a list - who are the people you absolutely have to accommodate? Parents, siblings, grandparents, best friends? Does anyone have travel restrictions (example, grandparents cannot fly)? Once you figure that out, do your best to accommodate those people and then make your decision.

    Remember that you're not going to please everybody, though. Don't worry about making things "even" or "fair," don't worry about settling arguments. Just say, "We are getting married at X. We'd love it if you can come but we understand if you can't." End of story. People can either make the effort to attend or they can stay home.

    Most people who biitch about the location will suck it up and come ... a lot of times, people just complain to see if you'll change for them. And if you change for Aunt Susie, then Uncle Tim is going to expect you to do the same for HIM. And so on, and so on.

    Do what you can and then let it go. If people want to complain, ignore them.

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