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June 2013 Weddings

Combining Finance

This just came up on the e-board today and the conversation was pretty interesting. With that in mind, what are your plans as far as finances go after you get married? Will you combine, partially combine, stay completely separate, have an allowance, etc?

FI and I already own a house together. We are starting to consider our personal debt as "our" debt, such as student loans, which we both have. We go int together on big purchases the 6K we dropped to fence in our backyard last fall and the new bed we recently bought. 

However, we have separate checking and saving accounts right now. And after we marry we plan to keep it that way, mostly. We have one joint credit card, though we both also have our own. We both have access to all the online bill accounts, our mortgage account, the joint credit card, and we have one tied account; an account through an online bank where we can transfer money back and forth to each other, but we don't actually have access to the account other than our individual one. 

We currently split our bills in a way that we both pay equally into it based on how much we make. He pays a little more because he makes a little more. We've discussed opening a joint saving account after we gat married to put any wedding money it because we plan to use it renovate our house as much as possible. But that's pretty much it. If one or the other needs help paying for something then we help each other. Like the second half of our property taxes are due next week and he just asked me for some money to contribute to them the other day, which I of course agreed to, since it's both of our property, lol. 

Both his parents have separate finances (really unusual for the older generation) and mine have always been combined. I personally want to keep them mostly separate, as we've been doing, which the exception of putting our wedding money into a new shared account. 

FI's mom also just told him they took a term life policy out on him as a baby that he can close and have the money from if he'd like (since he now has life insurance through his job). It's about 8k and we've been discussing what to do with it. Originally we were going to put it towards home renovations and wedding expenses, but now he's most likely going to pay down part of his student loans with it. Which I'm perfectly happy about because we see our student loans as our loans since we're committed and both debts will count against each of us equally in big purchases requiring loans. 

...Sorry for novel. 
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Re: Combining Finance

  • I can really relate to this...not only do I own a house with my fiance, but I work for a bank (back office now, but I spent about three years in a branch). From my time in the branch and the stuff that I saw happen to people there as a result of their spouse wiping out their joint accounts, I was totally convinced that we'd keep one account where we'd deposit our share of bill money, have a joint savings, and then maintain our own checking/savings accounts as well.

    That went out the window when we bought our house. We lived in an apartment first, and since I work for a bank, I was the one who handled our bills & stuff. It eventually got to the point where I was asking my fiance to cut me a check for this or that like once every ten days, and I was having a really hard time keeping track of who owed the other for what. About a month before we closed on our house, we sat down and talked about it, and decided to combine all of our accounts. I handle all of the finances, pay the bills, do the budgeting, etc. At first I was a little nervous, but it has saved me a ton of time and frsutration every month trying to figure out who pays for what. Now we have a bill paying account, a savings account, and a checking account that our "play money" goes into for things like eating out, movies, etc. We also added each other as authorized signers on the credit cards that we have, so that neither of us had to worry about the other one maxing out a credit card or anything without the other knowing. So far, it's worked out very well.
  • Emily my FI and I are in a similar situation that you were at the beginning. We split things 50/50 which is ok but he makes a little more than me so there's usually some bill that will come up that I'll need to bum money off of him for. We have one joint account that we both dump money into to pay mutual bills but for other things it's tough to keep track. I'm pretty sure I owe him like $300 right now but it's such a headache to keep track of. 

    Once we get married we're going to put the bulk of our paychecks into our joint account and use that for bills, groceries, fun stuff etc. So there's no more I payed for this how about you pay for that kind of thing. We'll both keep our own savings and put the remainder of our checks into it. We've also discussed how the separate debt (my student loans, our car loans, credit cards etc) will become our debt rather than my debt vs his debt. He's a little upset that after we get married he suddenly gets to help pay off my student loans but he's ok with it.
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  • Our situation is a little different since when I had Gabie I stayed home with her for 2 years and FI was the only one working. So we pretty much had his checking account for bills (he hasn't had too much saved up at that point), and we'd transfer money from my pre-baby savings whenever we had some major purchases to make. Now that I'm working again we have a joint checking and savings accounts, and we just have our checks go in there. I also have a separate account at the bank that my parents use since they are paying for the most of our wedding and it makes it easier for my dad to transfer money whenever we have to put a deposit down. But other then that we don't use that account for too much.

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  • edited May 2012

    about same story here as well, only my FI makes significantly more than I do so we made a budget up for me and I pay for what I can since I have student loans and I just graduated last year so I'm just now starting to pay it off, and it leaves me with little left over.  We already have a joint checking account and we both deposit money into each others separate account for bills, groceries, etc depends on who pays the majority.  we also have separate and joint savings account which the joint account is not really being used since I'm strapped for cash trying to pay off my debt as much as possible before we get married so he doesn't accrue so much from me.  I'm also mainly saving up for the wedding tho my parents are paying for the majority, I still want to have some extra in case we go over budget.  But we haven't talked much more than that, but I think after today's post we may be talking about it sooner than later.  But I still may want to keep separate accounts just until I pay off my debt.

  • Currently we have a joint checking and savings that is used for shared expenses and we contribute equally to.  I was put in charge of paying all joint bills on the joint accounts, since I'm an accountant and used to work as a teller.  We also each have our own separate checking and savings that we use for our own personal expenses such as student and car loans.  It is probably going to stay the same after we get married, with the exception of maybe getting a joint credit card.  I don't think that we should be responsible for the other's debt that was created before marriage.
    My parents have the same as us, using their personal accounts for fun things and gifts for the other person.  My FIL's have completely separate accounts and each pay for certain bills, which I find very interesting for that generation.
  • cnf2013cnf2013 member
    1000 Comments Second Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    My FI's parents also have completely separate finance which I also found to be extremely odd for them being an older generation. My parents on the other hand have always had totally combined finances and just take out money each week for personal use. The differences in how couples choose to manage their money together is interesting to me I guess.
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  • FI and I just opened up accounts the other day since he moved here and needed a new bank. We each have a separate checking account and savings account and also have a joint checking account that we will use for bills, etc. We plan on keeping it this way, but things may change depending on how life goes.
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  • We will keep everything separate. We do have a joint checking we opened for wedding expenses and after the wedding we will use it for vacation savings. We each have certain bills we pay and we will keep it that way. We've had the same set up for 4 years and it works for us. Besides I would never even consider combining finances, not after my 1st marriage.
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  • Well I can't speak for long term, but we actually already have a joint account.  Right now it is our wedding fund, will transition into the house fund, and then after that will become our joint savings (just the rainy day fund) and joint checking for paying all our bills.  We will divide the bills proportionally and alot a certain percentage into the rainy day fund, and any excess becomes our personal spending money.  If we had a joint regular spending money account, I would want to wring his neck all the time because I would have plans for the money and he likes to spend on useless stuff.  And he would equally get frustrated because I would never let him spend any of it haha.  Thus, we will keep separate spending money but save together and pay bills together.
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  • FI and I do not live together right now and we haven't bought anything together.

    I keep up with FI's fianances so pretty much when he buys anything he either hands me a receipt or sends me a txt that says, "$5.03 Mcdonalds" or "$40.00 Gas"...So if someone were to read our txt messages, they would think we were crazy.

    I don't have any debts and FI will have his paid off by the time we get married...well until we buy a house...We don't exactly have 150K+ sitting in the bank...

    Just to make it easier on me (since I will have to keep up with his crap and mine), we will probably have a joint account.
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  • Right now we have separate accounts and I'm pretty sure it's going to stay that way. He owns rental properties and I have student loans so we're better off this way. He pays all the bills since he makes double what I make but I give him money when he wants it. Right now our agreement is he pays the bills and my money goes towards the wedding. After the wedding I will start taking over a few of the bills but basically I'll be taking care of the food and house and he'll handle everything else. Plus I plan on getting pregnant next fall or winter so I'll be saving money for a new addition. :)
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