Picking a Date.

demarcomatt · April 2010

OK so I am new on here... I have been engaged for a while and my fiance and I just started the planning process. We have sometime before our wedding and are having trouble picking a date. Our current anniversary is in July and falls on a thursday the year we are looking to get married. We would both love to keep this date. We have been dating since I was sixteen and if we get married on that date it will be our eleven year anniversary. We have been told so many different things about thursday weddings and we are not sure what to do. Is it ok to have a thursday wedding in the summer?

Night_Sprite · April 2010

A Thursday wedding will mean many people can't come and it will be incredibly inconvenient. How many people are you planning to invite?

alixzafiris · April 2010

I'm confused as to how it would be any different in the winter? Your guests aren't going to be all school kids surely?

Honestly, as long as you acknowledge the fact that it will be inconvenient for people and as a result, you probably won't have as many people able to attend as you may like, I don't see a problem with it. But you can't expect everyone to be able to make it mid-week.

shellydiane820 · April 2010

Don't have a Thursday wedding, that's really inconvenient. Just have the wedding the weekend before or after that date.

ashmy211 · April 2010

As long as you don't mind having a small wedding, it's up to you. Would it be that big of a deal to get married 1 or 2 days after your dating anniversary so that more people would be able to make it?

lauralaur · April 2010

H's cousin is getting married on a Thursday evening. We're going, but we're taking a day and half off so we can stay late at the reception and skip work the next day. If you have guests who can't take the time off, you have to realize that they either won't come or they won't stay late. It will decrease your attendance for sure.

demarcomatt · April 2010

We plan to invite 100 people. All are immediate family and very close friends. I understand that it is inconvenient. My fiance is really pushing this date more than I am because thursday weddings are extremely less expensive. This date is extremely important to me as well. I just am not sure what to do.

sarah0725 · April 2010

My brother had a Thursday wedding in July, across the country from our family. Almost nobody from our side of the family came. However, he did get a great deal on the reception. I'm not really sure which was more important to him.

If your guests are pretty much local, and you know this won't inconvenience them too much, then go for it. Only you really know what your crowd will expect.

If a really really close friend or family member had a Thursday wedding, I would do everything I could to be there.

Moneypenny424 · April 2010

I wouldn't do it either. I couldn't ask people to take time off work to come to the wedding. I'd hate feeling obligated to go to a wedding and then know I had to take 2 or maybe 3 days off work.

I understand that Thursdays have become popular in NYC, but I should hope that is mainly for people whose guest list is mainly local.

brookelynpaisley · April 2010

No, because not everyone is off on a Thursday in the summer. Honestly, you get a whole new anniversary to celebrate. Why not pick the Saturday near your anniversary and just make it a celebration weekend?

MyNameIsNot · April 2010

I wouldn't expect very many people to come, and those that will probably won't stay very late.

Your parents, siblings and very best friends will do everything they can to be there (and even some of them still may not be able to make it). As long as it isn't really that important to you if people can make it, and you don't mind putting people out, having a Thursday wedding is ok.

MeaghanandMichael · April 2010

I am weird for not even remembering out 'dating' anny? I mean, I know I didn't date Mike for 11 years, but it still sounds highschool-ish to me.

luckyme502 · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_picking-date?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb8c9e22-ea0c-41b7-b554-049770cf07e7Post:5ae91006-0474-4290-bb8c-e5cc65d46d0e">Re: Picking a Date.</a>:
[QUOTE]I am weird for not even remembering out 'dating' anny? I mean, I know I didn't date Mike for 11 years, but it still sounds highschool-ish to me.
Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

This. I can't even remember what month it was. I'm pretty sure it was the end of summer or beginning of fall.

bethsmiles · April 2010

In my opinion the people who celebrate your marriage with you are more important than a date. Your wedding date will be special no matter what date you pick, don't get stuck on using your dating anniversary just because its your dating anniversary. More people will be able to come if you have it that weekend or the weekend before and it will be much more convenient.

HisCB · April 2010

think of it this way, if you have a dating anniversary and a different wedding anniversary, two great reasons to celebrate later!

i agree tho whatever date you get married will be special.

if he really wants the thursday to save $ and you really want the date, i suggest an evening wedding. more people will be able to come in the evening than in the afternoon.

if it were me, i would not want to inconvience my guests to keep an arbitrary detail in play. you can save plenty of money having a saturday or sunday wedding if you look at lots of budget wedding ideas. the difference in cost can easily be made up by being creative and prioritizing your budget items.

Picking a Date.

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