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Catholic Weddings

Together for Life and help!

Good Afternoon ladies. I seldom post on this wall, but I have in the past. Both the FI and I recently converted, and we’ve never been to a Catholic wedding ceremony nor are our families especially helpful in this area. About two weeks ago, we received the book Together for Life from our priest. We sat down today and picked our readings and who would read them. Then we got to the part of the customization where we don’t really understand. I understand why it is important to pick our readings, but how does the preface and the blessing work itself into all of this? How important is it for us to pick certain things other than the readings. How does the structure of the nuptial mass different than a church mass?

Re: Together for Life and help!

  • catarntinacatarntina member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    You could also ask the priest doing the ceremony to pick out some of those things if you can't decide.  Our priest volunteered to pick out everything; we agreed. He seemed thrilled. "Ok, great!  I'll pick out some very nice readings!"

    Nuptial Mass is very similar to a regular mass. There's a section in the middle with the vows, exchange of rings, and blessings before communion.

    http://www.catholicweddinghelp.com/topics/catholic-wedding-program-template-mass.htm

    This is an example program.  It shows the order of mass, etc.  I found it very useful (this site also has example programs for marriage outside of mass).
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  • edited December 2011
    We actually never got a TFL book, so we used our parish's wedding packet which had a lot of the choices and examples in it. We also used catholicweddinghelp.com
    It is a great site to use when you are planning your wedding.
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  • edited December 2011

    Ask your preist if he would mind if you attended a wedding at the parish. Maybe a stranger that he knows wouldn't mind or someone you go to pre-cana with. It will definitely help you to see a ceremony or mass before you have yours.

    Since you are new to Catholicism (congratulations!) I'm sure there are a lot of things that you have not experienced aside from your own sacraments. Discuss it with your preist and those you went through RCIA with. It will all make you feel more comfortable and you will enjoy your own ceremony more if you have a better idea of what to expect.

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  • mica178mica178 member
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I liked catholicweddinghelp too. 

    Basically, there should be an overall theme and message to your readings, so there should be a progression between the readings and the chosen psalm and Alleluiah should ideally match the message you are trying to convey to your wedding guests (love, hope, faith, community, etc.).  Most priest will want to talk with you about your choices to make sure that everything flows well, and your priest will likely be open to making suggestions if you're not sure about something.  Your music director might be able to help with selections as well.  Mine was probably as well versed in Scripture and Catholic tradition and history as agapecarrie, a wonderful resource.
  • edited December 2011
    The readings we picked were...

    Ecclesiastes 4:8-12
    Psalm 148
    Philippines 4:4-9
    Mark 10:6-9

    Thanks everyone! We come from such a small parish that I don't think we have any weddings coming up. We're a military town so a lot of couples do marriage prep here, but get married elsewhere. Thanks everyone!


  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_together-life?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:6a66ea3a-b37a-4a35-8b9f-c24b4ccda9b8Post:fc8c0ad6-1718-435e-82be-b46e6fb0854f">Re: Together for Life and help!</a>:
    [QUOTE]The readings we picked were... Ecclesiastes 4:8-12 Psalm 148 Philippines 4:4-9 Mark 10:6-9 Thanks everyone! We come from such a small parish that I don't think we have any weddings coming up. <strong>We're a military town so a lot of couples do marriage prep here, but get married elsewhere</strong>. Thanks everyone!
    Posted by GeorgiaPeachMarie[/QUOTE]

    Are you in Georgia? I noticed your screen name and was wondering esp when you said in a military town. We live in Augusta GA and we have Ft. Gordon very close to us, but I know there are some other bases down here as well.
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  • edited December 2011
    I am from Georgia, but we're live in Valdosta which has Moody Air Force Base. Most of our friends are military. But it is a pretty small town once you take out the military base. Our church is the only Catholic church for fifty miles.
  • edited December 2011
    Picking out the preface and the blessings is just a way for you to further customize your wedding to you and your FI.  I know in going through Together for Life, there were some versions of blessings, etc that I really liked and some versions that I didn't particularly like.  I found some versions of the blessings to be more focused on traditional gender roles than I was really comfortable with ("Give your blessings to Name, your daughter, so that she may be a good wife and mother, caring for the home").  So I was glad to be able to pick the versions that spoke to me more.
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