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Prayers needed

twixinthemixtwixinthemix member
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in Christian Weddings
Just asking for some prayers as I need to have a talk with FI tomorrow.  After talking to one of my lovely (and very wise) BM's, I think FI and I need to redraw our physical boundaries.  We're not having sex, but we've gone pretty far.  While I'm a virgin, FI is not, and I think we weren't super clear about boundaries except for no sex before marriage.  I think we should take a step back and focus on our other love languages (If you've ever read the 5 Love Languages book!), like Serving Others and Words of Affection.  I know God will bless the "phsyical" aspect of our relationship at the time of our wedding, and I don't want to head into marriage with any guilt.  

I'm nervous talking to FI about it, but he's an incredible man who is so understanding.  I'm sure it'll go fine, it's just a tough conversation to have when it's something we're both struggling with!

Thanks everyone!!

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"And now you stand before me today, and with all my heart I say, that you are God's miracle to me." June 18th, 2011
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Re: Prayers needed

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    AshNoel8AshNoel8
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    edited December 2011
    I will say a prayer that you find the right words to say and that he will not only agree, but tell you he's been thinking the same thing! The good news is, you only have a few months until you can unite your lives forever. GL! I'm sure it will go well. 
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    iamjoesgurliamjoesgurl member
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    edited December 2011
    I understand your struggles and will pray for both of you.  And I hope that your talk goes well and as Ash said, that God would be speaking the same words to both of you.
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    sister2groomsister2groom
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    edited December 2011
    If you haven't already talked (and even if you have) I'm praying for you.

    I would strongly suggest you each find someone to keep you accountable, sounds like you've already found at least one person who's doing that for you. Also, it would be great if there was a more mature married Christian couple that could keep you both accountable and offer advice/encouragement.
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    GJones27GJones27 member
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    edited December 2011
    Good luck!  That is indeed difficult, and based off my personal experiences, I could offer one piece of advice.  One time after my FI and I kissed too much, I felt a little guilty and expressed that we need a little more boundaries.  That made him insecure, as he thought I had issues with physical stuff in general.  Once I made clear that I didn't but just wanted to wait until marriage so I had no guilt, he felt better and much more comfortable with my request.  Guys, I think, can feel a little insecure if women withdraw, so just make sure he knows that you'll be totally comfortable after marriage.

    Btw, how long do you two have until your wedding?  I hope everything works out!  I'm sure it will. 
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    twixinthemixtwixinthemix member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Update!

    We had the conversation tonight, and overall it went well.  He had felt the same way too about us going to far.  We set some strict boundaries, and while it's going to be really tough, we both know it'll build up anticipation and will be very worth it come the honeymoon. And to answer your question Jones, we're getting married June 18th, so around 4 1/2 months left!!

    2012 Reading Challenge

    2012 Reading Challenge
    Erin has read 1 book toward her goal of 25 books.
    hide
    Follow Me on Pinterest Married Bio and For Sale! Updated 12/23
    "And now you stand before me today, and with all my heart I say, that you are God's miracle to me." June 18th, 2011
    image
    Report Reply
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    GJones27GJones27 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Glad it went okay and that you're on the same page.  Four and a half months will be here before you know it! 
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