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Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)

Thank You Everyone for your responses. I have decided to get her a brooch to put on her dress to give her just the smallest 'bling' to say she is special to me and I appreciate her being by my side. It makes a great MOH gift too! I'm going to get a matching pair to put one in the center of her flowers as well. 
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Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)

  • Could you order her dress in a different shade of the same colour?
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  • MOHs don't have to stand out.  I've only seen it once where the MOH wore a different dress.  If she liked the same dress and doesn't care if she stands out, I wouldn't worry too much about it.  I like the idea of making her bouquet a little larger, or maybe it could have another kind/color of flower integrated into it.

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  • My MOH wore the same dress and had the same bouquet.  Her honor was denoted by the order she walked in the processional, where she stood for the ceremony, signing our marriage license as a witness, and making a toast (only our MOH and BM, plus my dad made toasts).
  • Are you set on her standing out?  I never really see a need for that; they all do the same thing. There really is no need to draw attention to "the chosen one" unless you really want to. If you want to, that's fine; I'm just pointing it out b/c a lot of people get it in their heads that they HAVE to.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • I also don't see a need to make her stand out. If you have programs, she will be listed as MOH. She will also stand next to you, hold your bouquet, and possibly make a toast (if she would like to). People will know she's the MOH. I don't think she needs to wear a different dress or anything.


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  • I will never understand the need for a MOH to stand out.  This is YOUR day with your groom, not hers!  Everyone knows the MOH is the last to come down the aisle before the bride and she is also the one standing next to the bride holding the bouquet and she also typically gives a toast at the wedding reception so why does she have to stand out any more if you're already giving her a larger bouquet?  The best man doesn't have anything that stands out, does he?  That's just silly when you think of it that way.
  • Why does she need to stand out?
  • She doesn't need to stand out, it's your day not hers. Give her a different boquet? At one wedding my mother did hair for, the Bride had a white boquet with purple ribbon, the MOH had a purple boquet with white ribbon, and the BM's had mixed purple and white. Maybe do something subtle like that? The MOH and BM's had the same size boquet.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:381cccce-cdac-41de-a9bb-ae81f5fb2568">Re:Making my MOH different? No sash, No different color dress</a>:
    [QUOTE]Could you order her dress in a different shade of the same colour?
    Posted by kristbot[/QUOTE]
    No unfortunatly we already ordered it in my main color and David's Bridal does not do refunds.
  • Yes our Best Man has a different boutonniere and he has a different color tie with his vest.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:971d2e65-f3bb-43fe-a49b-364c595d44ac">Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)</a>:
    [QUOTE]Why does she need to stand out?
    Posted by Jen4948[/QUOTE]
    <span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;background-color:#ffffff;">I don't feel like I 'HAVE' to but I really want to. She is special to me and my fiance and I just think she deserves to stand out just a little extra. I thought of different color shoes but they all decided on a long dress.</span>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:0ba1c639-676b-4596-a7aa-aaf146734f2d">Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)</a>:
    [QUOTE]I will never understand the need for a MOH to stand out.  This is YOUR day with your groom, not hers!  Everyone knows the MOH is the last to come down the aisle before the bride and she is also the one standing next to the bride holding the bouquet and she also typically gives a toast at the wedding reception so why does she have to stand out any more if you're already giving her a larger bouquet?  The best man doesn't have anything that stands out, does he?  That's just silly when you think of it that way.
    Posted by mlg78[/QUOTE]<div><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;background-color:#ffffff;">Again I don't feel like I 'have to' I just want to. And she isn't asking me to do so, she is just happy to be there.  And yes our Best Man has a different boutonniere and he has a different color tie with his vest. I originally thought she would pick a different dress but she liked the one all the others did, AND she looked great in it!</span>

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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:b756154b-80b0-4d5d-8c67-1ac7c24d6fa7">Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)</a>:
    [QUOTE]I went to David's Bridal with all of my girls and they all found a dress they loved and all agreed on the same dress. I had originally planned on them all getting different dresses but they all picked the same one. Which is fine with me! But now I don't know how to make my MOH stand out. The dress is a one shoulder dress and the way the dress is designed a sash or something like that wouldn't look right on it. She is going to have a bigger bouquet but what else can I do to make her special? She says it's my day and it's all about me but she deserves to stand out too.Suggestions please!
    Posted by cdteal[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Thank you everyone for assuring me she doesn't have to stand out. She isn't asking to, I just want her to. So please give me suggestions how to, without a different color dress or a sash.

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  • There really isn't much else you can do to visually differentiate her from the others if she is already standing in the MOH spot and has a bigger bouquet and you don't want different dress, shoes, or a sash.

    Could her bouquet be completely different, but still tie into your color scheme? 

    Unless you want to have her wear her hair differently, which isn't an issue you should push, that's about all I can come up with. 
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
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    edited January 2013
    How is the Best Man's bout different?  Could you do something with her bouquet to include those flowers?  That's what we did for my husband and I. His bout had a calla lily and curly wilow and my bouquet had a few callas and curly willow, whereas my bridesmaids did not. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • She is standing next to you. That makes her visually stand out as MOH. Boom. Done.
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  • I'm of the "is it really important to do something if she don't care?" bandwagon, but if you're insistent, what about a hair clip/necklace/bracelet/some other piece of jewelry? There's really not a whole lot else to change if you want it unless you're going to insist all the BM dye their hair a separate color from the MOH or something...(if the sarcasm there isn't apparent, that was sarcasm :) )
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  • I know you already mentioned making her bouquet bigger.  Is it possible to make her bouquet a different shade of your wedding colors (or course, this depends on the colors since some colors don't have a lot of shade flexibility).  But, for example, if your BMs are wearing powder pink dresses with light pink bouquets, could your MOH have fuschia flowers incorporated in her bouquet?

    The only other suggestion I have is some sort of flower for her hair.  She'd have to be comfortable wearing it, of course, but you could add a pop of whatever your second color is and give her something that stands out at the same time.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:a8a6ecf2-eae2-48f3-8319-1ee4cd60b689">Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress) : I don't feel like I 'HAVE' to but I really want to. She is special to me and my fiance and I just think she deserves to stand out just a little extra. I thought of different color shoes but they all decided on a long dress.
    Posted by cdteal[/QUOTE]

    Maybe have her carry different flowers?
  • I agree with you I also want my MOH to stand out. I do not feel that this is neccesary but I would like to make her feel special. My girls also all liked the same dress. That being said, my MOH is having a slightly different bouquet and she is wearing a jeweled hair comb in her hair to make her stand out a little. I think it's cute and if you want to do it you should.
  • You could add a brooch onto her dress.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:12726705-7fa2-4c5f-b76c-d5f7a2ba786e">Re:Making my MOH different? No sash, No different color dress</a>:
    [QUOTE]You could add a brooch onto her dress.
    Posted by tlc35[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>I love this idea. It's a a one shoulder dress, do you have any suggestions on the best place to put it?
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:713ffa7e-3f0f-49f5-9056-415f3dfa39e2">Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)</a>:
    [QUOTE]I MOH is wearing a jeweled hair comb in her hair to make her stand out a little. 
    Posted by VickiK17[/QUOTE]

    <div>I have a question about this, and I'm not knocking it or trying to be snarky. I genuinely want to know. I see a lot of this recommended as a way for an MOH to stand out. Does this mean the other girls CAN'T wear anything in their hair, then?  </div>
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • Um, are you entirely sure that SHE wants to stand out as much as you are insisting on? If I was MOH and had a bunch of stuff to draw attention to me, I'd be SUPER uncomfortable. I'd spend my entire time up there worrying that people think I'm an AW that is trying to outshine the bride. I wouldn't WANT any extra attention, it's not my day. Besides trying to stand out next to a bride practically requires a clown wig and an airhorn. It's super counterproductive and makes you look like as ss if you actually succeed.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:91e7d363-ec7e-464a-9838-cc4a613d1ef4">Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress) : Again I don't feel like I 'have to' I just want to. And she isn't asking me to do so, she is just happy to be there.  And yes our Best Man has a different boutonniere and he has a different color tie with his vest. I originally thought she would pick a different dress but she liked the one all the others did, AND she looked great in it!
    Posted by cdteal[/QUOTE]

    What will your bouquets and bouts look like?  If you are doing ribbon wrapped handles, how about wrapping her bouquet handle in a ribbon that matches the Best Man's tie.  The rest of the bridesmaids bouquet handles can be wrapped in the color the rest of the groomsmen are wearing.  Subtle but it's something.  I don't think there is much more you can or should do.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:accfc3f0-d186-4146-b865-e1f0e42f8c18">Re:Making my MOH different? No sash, No different color dress</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Making my MOH different? No sash, No different color dress : I love this idea. It's a a one shoulder dress, do you have any suggestions on the best place to put it?
    Posted by cdteal[/QUOTE]

    What about instead of a brooch, see if you can have the seamstress she uses sew in crystals or pearl accents into the flower portion of the strap.  Think of a gerber daisy and have the crystal or pearl be the center portion of the flower.

    I think doing the above would be very subtle way to make your MOH's attire different from the others.  And I doubt that adding the crystals would make her feel weird or awkward or like you are putting her on a pedestal, especially if she is not one who likes being the center of attention.

    Of course since she is most likely paying for the dress you will need to check with her to see if she is ok with the addition and of course you will have to pay for the addition as well.

    As for the topic of making the MOH different or stand out a bit more then the others.  I really don't see anything wrong with this.  Many times the difference is just in the flowers or a small change in the dress but it isn't like the OP wants to put the MOH on a pedestal and have a spotlight follow her around all night.

  • My bridesmaids all have a simple pretty headband and my MOH has a headband that is basically a feather fascinator. It's bigger and will definitely make her stand out a bit. I wanted her to stand out too.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:e568ca16-9222-4809-9214-a9b961c7de6e">Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't see how a brooch or a hair clip says "MOH".  I would never think "oh suzie has a rhinestone hairclip in, she must be the maid of honor!".  Besides, a good bride lets her girls do their hair however they like and accessorize to their own tastes, so that makes this even less likely to work for denoting an MoH.
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    <div>Thank you!  That's exactly how I was feeling with my hair question!  I just don't get that!</div>
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:e568ca16-9222-4809-9214-a9b961c7de6e">Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)</a>:
    [QUOTE]make her bouquet match the BM's bout and make it slightly larger than the other girls' bouquets. Done. ETA:  <strong>Also, I don't see how a brooch or a hair clip says "MOH".  I would never think "oh suzie has a rhinestone hairclip in, she must be the maid of honor!".</strong>  Besides, a good bride lets her girls do their hair however they like and accessorize to their own tastes, so that makes this even less likely to work for denoting an MoH.
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    I gave the OP an idea of adding some bling to the MOH dress just because she seemed so hell bent on making her stand out and I figured it was a subtle enough change to make her happy.  But honestly, I am with you.  I don't care what the bride does to make her MOH stand out (different flowers, dress, accessories) the ony reason I know they are the MOH is because they 1) were the last BM to walk down the aisle and 2) they are standing next to the bride.  Other then that, I doubt I would notice any add ons or changes that made them different from the other BMs.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_making-my-moh-different-no-sash-no-different-color-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:c8412262-6bda-4d7a-bfde-2a876068165bPost:29d7210f-d1ca-4a45-964f-a89ca6a17b0f">Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress)</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Making my MOH different? (No sash, No different color dress) : I have a question about this, and I'm not knocking it or trying to be snarky. I genuinely want to know. I see a lot of this recommended as a way for an MOH to stand out. Does this mean the other girls CAN'T wear anything in their hair, then?  
    Posted by AddieL73[/QUOTE]
    That's a really good question! Maybe hers can be bigger or different? She has really short hair, chin length so a comb might be a good idea.
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