As most of you know I am a Pharmacist and the profession pays decently.I am a recent grad about 2 years and I still have an insane amount of money owed on student loans . I do sometimes worry about money and stress out about it.Fi always tells me not to worry and he says that if I need any money to just ask him and he will give it to me.I have not asked him for money yet but I may need to ask him soon,I am worried sick! I hate asking for money, we do not live together but he still reassures me that we are going to be a family and that is what they do....Am I being crazy about worrying??
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Re: Money question (advice)
I would say ask for the money, but that is how my relationship is. It really would be hard for us to tell you what you should do because you know the comfort level and context these issues come up in. If he is offering, why not? I wouldn't see it as a blemish on your independence but a credit to the willingness to support each other as family. You would do the same for him, right?
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[QUOTE]Worrying about what, exactly? Money in general? Most people worry about finances. If you're worried about asking your FI for money, then I say don't. He's right. I ask H for money if I'm tight that month to cover a bill or my half of rent, and vice versa.
Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]
<div>Ditto Sesh. Don't feel bad about asking for a little help. I know my FI has pounded it into my head that we're a family and it's OUR money now. FWIW, he has a lot of student loans as well, and I have no problem with the money I'll be earning going towards paying that off. The faster it's paid off, the closer we are to having a house, being able to afford a baby, etc.</div>
He's my husband, and he wants me out of debt as much as I do, so that I can put the money I earn towards something more productive, like savings.
I get where you are coming from, but I know where he is coming from too. Bite the bullet if you need to.
[QUOTE]I'd be worried if I didn't have a<strong> long-term loan repayment plan</strong> and things of that nature. I agree that it's natural to worry about finances. But that's on a huge spectrum, because you also have people who worry about not having enough money to buy food or enough oil for winter. I don't know anyone who doesn't worry to some degree, regardless of their situation.
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]
This what he tells me..... He says " if you feel so bad about the money then just pay me later or put it towards the wedding account or whatever"....
FI helped me when I had a huge medical bills from a time I spent in the hospital when we weren't even together. My insurance sucked and I had to cover about 30% of total cost. It took me about 2yrs to pay off.
I felt uncertain about it at first since he wasn't even in the picture when it happen,but he said to me that we are family now and whatever issue or problems I am going through he is too.
[QUOTE]Fi always tells me not to worry and he says that if I need any money to just ask him and he will give it to me.I have not asked him for money yet but I may need to ask him soon,I am worried sick! I hate asking for money, we do not live together but he still reassures me that we are going to be a family and that is what they do....Posted by rxjen[/QUOTE]
If you get to where you need to borrow money, you could do the whole (informal) promissory note. It just makes it a little more businesslike. Then you won't feel like you're taking advantage of your FI. I've had to borrow from my dad and since my brother burned him, I had no problem doing a promissory note. I paid him back X dollars per month and we both knew what was expected. I know it sounds impersonal, but maybe that's what you need to alleviate your worries.
The advice helps, I just wanted an outsider opinion! I am going to ask him next week...
You just have to find a transition that works for you. It'll become easier once you are living together and the finances start getting muddled.