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Snarky Brides
future.mrs.roy
member
Facebook/email is not the phone!
Needed to vent...
Our wedding is this weekend. On Sunday, my FH received an email from a friend of his - something family related came up (in a week?) and he won't be coming after all. I thought it was a little rude, but, whatever.
The next day, my friend sent me a Facebook message to say she and her husband were also not coming now, for financial reasons. She got married last summer (and we attended her wedding), so I know she knows how I must be feeling. Seriously? Facebook? She said she'd tried to call multiple times - no missed calls on my end, so she must have just looked at the phone. I waited a day, cooled off a bit, and said I understood but wished she would have called.
Today, my AUNT sent me a Facebook message, saying my teenage cousin couldn't get off from work and isn't coming either. The same cousin who REFUSED to come unless he could bring his girlfriend, who I begrudgingly invited, RSVP'd that she was coming, and then they broke up.
Is this normal? I thought maybe one or two people would have an emergency and not make it, but I'm getting a "message" a day. Isn't rude to not call someone who has spent a lot of money for you to attend their wedding when you're not coming at the last minute?
Our budget was tight, and our guest list was as well. There were a lot of friends my FH and I wanted to invite, but couldn't. These people, who have shown much more enthusiasm about our wedding than the people who have suddenly declined, will be sitting at home while we have half empty tables.
Any ideas as to how I can not stress about this, or get it out of my system? I'm just feeling....GRR!
Our wedding is this weekend. On Sunday, my FH received an email from a friend of his - something family related came up (in a week?) and he won't be coming after all. I thought it was a little rude, but, whatever.
The next day, my friend sent me a Facebook message to say she and her husband were also not coming now, for financial reasons. She got married last summer (and we attended her wedding), so I know she knows how I must be feeling. Seriously? Facebook? She said she'd tried to call multiple times - no missed calls on my end, so she must have just looked at the phone. I waited a day, cooled off a bit, and said I understood but wished she would have called.
Today, my AUNT sent me a Facebook message, saying my teenage cousin couldn't get off from work and isn't coming either. The same cousin who REFUSED to come unless he could bring his girlfriend, who I begrudgingly invited, RSVP'd that she was coming, and then they broke up.
Is this normal? I thought maybe one or two people would have an emergency and not make it, but I'm getting a "message" a day. Isn't rude to not call someone who has spent a lot of money for you to attend their wedding when you're not coming at the last minute?
Our budget was tight, and our guest list was as well. There were a lot of friends my FH and I wanted to invite, but couldn't. These people, who have shown much more enthusiasm about our wedding than the people who have suddenly declined, will be sitting at home while we have half empty tables.
Any ideas as to how I can not stress about this, or get it out of my system? I'm just feeling....GRR!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Facebook/email is not the phone!
Everything the light touches is my kingdom.
Everything the light touches is my kingdom.
[QUOTE]WOuld you prefer they didn't let you know at all?
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]
I'm with J&K on this one. Yes, it sucks to have last minute declines, but getting yourself all worked up over the way in which they notify you is just a gigantic waste of energy.
Facebook wall post? No.
Facebook message? Sure, why not. Email in all its iterations is a perfectly valid form of communication.
And ditto J&K's parenthetical aside.
I dunno, I don't really fault people for sending emails or facebook messages. There are many ways to reach people, and if you have email, facebook, and a phone, you can trust that people will choose what method they like best to contact you. If I didn't want people to notify things to me via facebook, and I mean this: I'd delete my facebook. That way they'd have to call me. Besides, some people just don't like calling.
Have a glass of wine with dinner tonight. Instead of worrying about who can't attend your wedding and how they choose to notify you as such - concentrate on getting your last minute details figured out. Your wedding is in a couple days! That's exciting!
"Whatever East. You're just mad I RSVP'd "lame" to your pre-wedding sleepover."
[QUOTE]WOuld you prefer they didn't let you know at all?
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]
Yeah this. I consider FB messages to be almost exactly the same thing as emails. They get sent to places where I have to log in on the internet. It's just really not that important to me how people communicate with me, so long as they do it. Unless it's to tell me one of my friends or family members has died. That requires a phone call.
Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
No sense in stressing just for the sake of stressing! but the glass of wine is an excellent idea!
[QUOTE]Thanks, everyone for the quick feedback. It does put things in perspective that it's better to have the heads up than not know at all, and that technology is just a part of life. I think when it comes to weddings, I think of the ettiquette side of things, and that's where I thought a phone call was appropriate. No sense in stressing just for the sake of stressing! but the glass of wine is an excellent idea!
Posted by future.mrs.roy[/QUOTE]
Good attitude. Now, go have that glass of wine, and enjoy your wedding this weekend, with the people who were awesome enough to RSVP "yes" AND come ;)
Everything the light touches is my kingdom.
but yea, I don't mind facebook messages- much prefer them actually. I don't like talking on the phone either.
rescue powered by
[QUOTE]Thanks again, everyone!! This has definitely helped chill me out, and now I'm able to focus on the fact we're getting married on Sunday, and no one and nothing is going to stand in our way - or put a damper on our day!
Posted by future.mrs.roy[/QUOTE]
If you have already accounted for the number of people with the caterers and vendors, of these people that aren't showing up, maybe use it as an opportunity to invite a couple of the people you really wanted to be there but just couldn't have due to the guest list constraint. I'm sure if they are a close enough friends they understand your situation and not take is as a "oh, so I'm last resort getting an invite". Although, just a couple days out from the wedding, I can totally understand why you wouldn't even want to start in on that.